98+ Concussion Jokes & Puns: You’ll Faint From Laughter!
π€π Get ready to laugh (but not too hard, we don’t want any more concussions!) because we’ve got the ultimate list of concussion jokes and puns! This collection of the best brain-tickling humor is perfect for kids and adults alike. π€ From clever wordplay to silly one-liners, get ready for some seriously funny puns. This isn’t just a random list of jokes – we’ve handpicked the most hilarious and clever concussion-related humor around. So put on your thinking caps (or maybe not π) and dive in!
Top Concussion Jokes – Best Picks
- Why did the doctor recommend a memory foam pillow after the comedian’s concussion? He wanted to cushion the blow to his material.
- I went to a psychic who said she could communicate with my future self after my concussion. Turns out, she’s got the wrong number.
- Heard about the football player who got a concussion from a high five? Talk about a head-slapping play!
- Why did the scarecrow win an award after his concussion? Because he was outstanding in his field… literally.
- Why don’t they let concussed owls deliver mail anymore? They kept forgetting hoo they were supposed to deliver to.
- My doctor told me my concussion symptoms might include sudden bursts of energy. So I asked, “When does that start?”. He said, “Right now!”.
- What do you call a sheepdog with a concussion? A little ruff around the edges.
- Whatβs the difference between a concussion and a good idea? I donβt remember, I have a concussion.
- Did you hear about the clumsy ghost who got a concussion? Turns out, even passing through walls has its drawbacks.
- How can you tell if someone is a professional juggler with a concussion? They keep dropping the ball⦠on their head.
- What do you call a group of brain cells trying to remember something after a concussion? A mind-boggling mystery.
- What did the doctor say to the patient who asked how he got a concussion? “I can’t tell you right now, you wouldn’t get it.”
- My doctor said my concussion was so bad, I might start seeing double. I guess he was right, Iβm seeing two of him right now!
- My friend asked me what I’ve been up to since my concussion. I honestly couldn’t tell himβ¦ I have no current events to share.
Clever Concussion Puns – Best Picks
- I went to a seminar on head injuries. It was very concussive. It really made an impact.
- Heard about the football player who failed his concussion test? He just couldn’t get ahead of the game.
- What do you get if you cross a concussed comedian with a broken pencil? No point.
- A doctor told a musician he had a concussion. The musician said, βI want a second opinion.β The doctor replied, βYou are also a terrible banjo player.β
- My friend asked if he could use my head injury to make a pun. I said, “knock yourself out.”
- What do you call a concussed judge’s decision? A headstrong verdict.
- I walked into a wall today and got a concussion. At least now I’m a head of the curve.
- I should have seen that concussion coming, but I guess I had my head in the clouds.
- The brain surgeon said my concussion wasn’t serious. He must have been losing his mind.
- Someone stole my concussion support group pamphlets. Now I have nothing to go on.
- Having a concussion is like a rollercoaster… full of ups and downs, and you’re never sure which way is up.
- My doctor said my concussion was minor. I guess he didnβt think it was a big deal.
- Why did the concussed student get bad grades? He had trouble remembering the lesson plans.
- Never argue with a concussed person, they always have a splitting headache.
Funny Concussion One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Concussion Jokes
- I told my doctor I got a concussion today… he said, “When did this happen?” I said, “What doctor?”
- My friend got a concussion after walking into a wall. I guess you could say he wasn’t all there.
- Having a concussion is such a headache, literally!
- My doctor said I have amnesia and a concussion. I said, “Good thing I can’t remember anything because that sounds expensive.”
- Always wear a helmet! It’s better to have a head full of padding than a head full of nothing.
- My doctor suggested memory exercises for my concussion. I said “Great, what kind?” He said, “How about starting with paying your bill?”
- Someone threw a dictionary at my head. I only have myself to blame, I should have seen the vocabulary coming.
- My doctor asked me to describe my concussion symptoms. I said, “I’m seeing stars!” He said, “That’s not good… this is a clinic, not an observatory.”
- I got hit in the head with a boomerang today. I’m hoping it doesn’t come back to me.
- Concussions are no laughing matter. Unless, of course, you can’t remember the punchline.
- Never underestimate the power of a good helmet. It’s the difference between “ouch” and “who am I?”
- My doctor told me my concussion was very severe. I was like, “Wow, I can’t believe it’s that bad.” He said, “You said that five minutes ago.”
Concussion QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Concussion
- Q: What do you call a psychic with a concussion? A: A short-circuited seer.
- Q: Why did the doctor recommend a memory foam pillow to the concussion patient? A: He heard it could really jog their memory.
- Q: Did you hear about the football player who got a concussion from thinking too hard? A: Yeah, it was a real brain-teaser.
- Q: What did the doctor say to the detective with a concussion? A: “Looks like you’ve got a case of the head-scratchers.”
- Q: Why is it so hard to argue with someone who has a concussion? A: They always forget what point they were trying to head-butt.
- Q: What’s the most common side effect of a philosophy textbook concussion? A: Existential dread-ache.
- Q: How can you tell if a ghost has a concussion? A: It keeps forgetting to say “boo.”
- Q: Why did the comedian with a concussion bomb at his show? A: His timing was all knocked loopy.
- Q: What did the lightbulb say to the concussion? A: “Hey, I know how you feel, I get hit on the head all the time!”
- Q: Why did the computer get a concussion? A: It had a serious hard drive failure.
- Q: What’s the worst part about getting a concussion in a food fight? A: Having to take things one mashed potato at a time.
- Q: Why did the amnesia patient refuse to believe he had a concussion? A: He claimed he hadn’t hit his head in years!
- Q: Did you hear about the scarecrow who won a Nobel Prize after a concussion? A: Turns out, he was always brilliant; he just needed a little rattling.
- Q: Why do they call it a ‘concussion’? A: Because ‘brain-wobble’ just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Dad Jokes About Concussion: Pun-Filled Quips
- I went to a seminar about concussion awareness… it really knocked some sense into me!
- My doctor said I shouldn’t play contact sports until my concussion heals. Now I can’t tell if he’s joking or not. Guess I’ll just have to play it by ear.
- Why did the football player get sent to the principal’s office? He got caught using his head in class… for a concussion.
- Someone stole my “Get Well Soon” balloon after my concussion. I guess you could say they really raised the bar for bad behavior.
- After my concussion, the doctor asked me to repeat a simple phrase: βNo ifs, ands, orβ¦β I forgot the rest. Guess it slipped my mind.
- Whatβs the leading cause of a concussion in a glass of water? Thinking too hard about it.
- The doctor asked if I knew what caused my concussion. I said, “To be honest, it’s a bit of a blur.”
- You know, you canβt actually give someone a concussion by talking about itβ¦ unless you throw a dictionary at them. Then, you might have a head case on your hands!
- My friend said after his concussion, all he could see were dollar signs. Sounds like he got hit where it counts!
- What do you get when you cross a concussion with a bad pun? Head-scratching humor!
- Ever heard of the head injury support group that meets in an elevator? Yeah, it’s on the up and up!
- My wife asked me to describe my concussion symptoms, so I said, “I’m seeing stars.” She said, “That’s not a concussion, that’s this restaurant.”
- What do you call a group of brain cells trying to remember something after a concussion? A think tank running on empty.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award after his concussion? Because he was outstanding in his field!
- My doctor told me to take it easy after my concussion. I told him, βDon’t worry, Iβll try not to lose my head!β
Concussion Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the soccer ball get sent to the principal’s office? It got a head-start on causing a concussion! π€β½οΈ
- What did one plate say to the other plate that bumped into it? “Hey! Watch your head, I don’t want you getting a dish-cussion!” π½οΈπ₯
- How can you tell if a sheep has a concussion? It starts seeing stars…and little lambs! ππ«
- Why did the bicycle helmet break up with the head? It said, βThis relationship is heading for a concussion!β π²ππ€
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Concussion. Concussion who? Sorry, I forgot what I was going to say… π
- What do you get if you cross a head injury with a tropical fruit? A Concus-sion melon! ππ€π
- My friend said he got a concussion from playing the cymbals. Sounds kinda fishy to me! ππ₯π€¨
- Why did the teacher send the bouncy ball to the nurse? She was worried it might have a “ball-cussion”! πΎπ©ββοΈ
- What happens when a ghost gets a concussion? It gets boo-boos all over! π»π€
- What did the doctor say to the crayon who bumped its head? “Hmm, looks like you’ve got a case of the color-cussions!” ποΈππ€
- What board game are concussions really good at? Memory… or lack thereof! π€π²
- Why don’t they let concussions drive? They’re always getting lost in thought… or completely forgetting where they’re going! ππ¨π€
- My friend told me she was hit with a brilliant idea… I hope she wasnβt standing too close when it hit!π‘π€π
- Where do concussions sleep? On a memory foam pillow, of course! π΄βοΈπ§
Concussion Jokes and Puns for Elders
- My doctor said I have a mild concussion. I guess you could say it’s a… thinking man’s injury.
- I went to an antique auction and saw a first edition “Gray’s Anatomy” signed by the author. I thought, “That’s a steal!”, reached for my wallet, and then… well, let’s just say I have a newly acquired appreciation for head trauma.
- My neurologist told me to avoid any strenuous activity for a while… so, naturally, I asked him to clarify how long βa whileβ is in doctor years.
- I told my wife my short-term memory is getting worse. She said, “When did that happen?” I replied, “See?! You understand!”
- The doctor asked if I’d had any recent head injuries. I said, “I can’t remember.” He chuckled and said, “Classic.” I laughed and said, “I love that movie!”
- Getting old is like a constant state of dΓ©jΓ vu. Except I can never remember if I’ve done something or just thought about doing it.
- I’m at that age where “having a senior moment” is starting to feel redundant.
- I got into a heated debate about healthcare with a millennial the other day. He kept arguing we should rely on essential oils and crystals. I just shook my head and said, “Kids these days… they haven’t hit their heads enough yet.”
- I wouldnβt say I have a split personality after my accident… more like a fractured one.
- Used to be, a night out meant cocktails and dancing. Now it’s remembering to take my pills and avoiding shag carpeting.
- Never thought I’d say this, but I miss the days when the only thing I had to worry about forgetting was where I put my glasses.
- My grandkids got me one of those brain training apps for my phone. Now, if I could just remember what I did with my phone…
- My therapist suggested I keep a journal to track my cognitive exercises. Personally, I think writing on the walls is more my speed.
Concussion Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- I told my doctor I got a concussion today from playing music. He asked, “Was it a heavy metal concert?” I replied, “No, I just walked into a cymbal.” π₯π₯
- My friend said his memory has been a little spotty since his concussion. I told him, “Don’t worry, it comes and goes.” He said, “What does?” π€ͺ
- Just saw a sign that said “Concussion Clinic Ahead.” Seemed a bit forward…they hardly know me! π§π
- What do you call a sheep with a concussion? A baaaaad idea that needs to see a doctor immediately. ππ€π
- My doctor told me to avoid any stressful activities after my concussion. Guess I’ll have to put my career as a bomb disposal expert on hold. π£π€―
- I used to be addicted to collecting vintage clocks, but I got a concussion and everything’s been grandfatherly hazy since. π°οΈπ΄
- What do you call a group of brain cells trying to remember something after a concussion? A think tank running on fumes. π§ β½
- Started a band called “The Concussions.” We’re really good, but nobody comes to our shows twice. π€π«π
- You know you’ve had a bad concussion when you forget how to tie your shoes, but still remember the entire script of “Bee Movie” word for word. ππ§
- I wanted to try that new memory foam pillow, but after my concussion, I’m not sure it’d make a difference. π΄π€
- Tried to make a smoothie after my concussion. Turns out a blender and headache medication don’t mix well. Who knew? πππ€
- My doctor told me after my concussion, “Don’t worry, it’s all in your head.” I was like, “That’s the problem, dude.” ππ€¦ββοΈ
- Life after a concussion is like trying to explain Twitter to your grandparents. Confusing, disorienting, and ultimately pointless. π¦π΄π΅π€―
Head Out Now, Before You Lose Your Head! π
Well, there you have it! A head-spinning list of concussion jokes that’s sure to leave you feeling… well, hopefully not like you need a doctor. If you survived this list with your funny bone intact, head on over to our website for even more hilarious puns and jokes!