90+ Trauma Puns & Jokes: You’ll Feel Better Soon-ish
Buckle up, buttercups, because we’re about to dive into the best list of trauma puns and jokes this side of a therapy session! 😂 Don’t worry, this isn’t some kind of dark humor abyss (or maybe it is, who am I to judge? 🤷♀️). From clever wordplay to knee-slapping punchlines, we’ve got a healthy dose of humor that’s perfect for kids and adults alike! So, get ready to laugh your baggage off because this is going to be therapeutic…ly hilarious! 🤪
Top Trauma Jokes – Best Picks
Clever Trauma Puns – Best Picks
Funny Trauma One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Trauma Jokes
- I told my therapist about my fear of speed bumps. He said it was just a little bump in the road. I told him, “Yeah, well, that’s what caused the trauma!”
- What’s a therapist’s favorite type of tea? Re-traumatizing Chamomile.
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. I’m still holding on to that awkward phase in middle school.
- I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.
- The therapist told me to face my fears. So I deleted my browser history.
- Went to a seminar on dealing with emotional baggage. It was overstuffed and no one could find the carousel.
- A therapist told me to leave my comfort zone. I can’t even find it on a map.
- What do you call a self-help group for kleptomaniacs? A support group that meets in your living room.
- My therapist said I have separation anxiety… from my phone.
- You know you’ve been through a lot when the butterflies in your stomach migrate south and set up a panic room.
- My therapist told me to visualize my happy place. Apparently, the line for refunds was too long.
- My bank account is so traumatized from online shopping, it hides every time I open the browser.
- I went to a fight club for therapists, but it just broke down into a group hug.
- My therapist told me to find my voice. Now my inner critic won’t shut up.
- I’m not saying I have trust issues, but I still haven’t opened that email from 2012.
Trauma QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Trauma
- Q: What did the therapist say to comfort the stressed-out metronome? A: Don’t worry, everything is going to be okay… tick …in time.
- Q: Why did the therapist bring a ladder to their sessions? A: To help their patients unpack their emotional baggage.
- Q: What’s a therapist’s favorite board game? A: Sorry! (Not Sorry!)
- Q: How is a therapist like a sculptor? A: They both help people work through their issues.
- Q: How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just one, but the lightbulb has to really want to change.
- Q: What’s the difference between a psychologist and a magician? A: A magician makes your problems disappear temporarily, a psychologist charges you to tell you it’s all your parents’ fault.
- Q: Did you hear about the therapist who specialized in treating kleptomaniacs? A: Business was stealing!
- Q: What do you call a therapist who’s always tired? A: Emotionally drained.
- Q: Why did the therapist refuse to treat the comedian? A: He said all his problems were just a laughing matter!
- Q: How do trees get over their trauma? A: With some root-ine therapy.
- Q: Why was the therapist’s office always so messy? A: They had a lot on their mind…and their floor…and their desk…
- Q: What do you call a therapist who can speak whale? A: An Orca-therapist!
- Q: What happens at a support group for procrastination? A: Let’s talk about it tomorrow.
- Q: Why don’t therapists ever go crazy? A: They have too many outlets!
- Q: My therapist told me I have separation anxiety… A: … so I hugged them goodbye and never went back.
Dad Jokes About Trauma: Pun-Filled Quips
- Went to a seminar on dealing with childhood trauma. It brought back a lot of bad memories…and I forgot to pay for parking.
- What do you call an emotionally detached therapist? A trauma-remote.
- You know, I used to have a fear of speed bumps… Then I went over one very slowly. Guess you could say it was a very therapeutic experience.
- My therapist says I block out traumatic memories. I guess you could say my childhood is a bit of a blur-ricane.
- Don’t tell my therapist I replaced them with a parrot… but he keeps saying I’m the one who needs to start talking.
- I went to a museum dedicated to Freud’s theories on trauma. It was completely id-yllic.
- Apparently, my therapist thinks I’m making progress. He said I’m starting to sound less crazy and more like a broken record.
- You know you’ve found a good therapist when they tell you to chill out… on the couch.
- Trying to get over my fear of heights. My therapist suggested starting with baby steps. I told him that sounded terrifying from up here!
- My therapist gave me a pamphlet on “Healing Crystals” to help with my trauma. Now that’s what I call alternative medicine!
- My therapist asked me to describe my safe space. So, naturally, I described his office covered in bubble wrap. He didn’t laugh.
- What’s the difference between a psychologist and a magician? A magician pulls rabbits out of hats, and a psychologist listens to you pull your hare-raising trauma out of your past.
Trauma Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the drummer go to the bank? To get his cymbal checked!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
- Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca the suitcase, you load up the car!
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Cows go. Cows go who? No, silly! Cows go “moo”!”
- What musical instrument do you find in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste!
- What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry!
- Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencil-vania!
- What does a cloud wear under its raincoat? Thunderwear!
Trauma Jokes and Puns for Elders
- I went to a seminar on dealing with past traumas. It was incredibly moving… literally, we switched venues three times because they couldn’t find a big enough room. (Plays on the double meaning of “moving”)
- My therapist told me to embrace my past traumas. I gave them a hug, but they didn’t seem too happy about it. (Plays on the literal interpretation of “embrace”)
- You know you’re getting old when the biggest traumas you face are remembering where you parked the car and trying to open those darn pill bottles. (Relatable, age-specific humor)
Trauma Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- I tripped and fell down the stairs carrying a dictionary. I guess you could say it was a traumatic experience. 📚🤕
- Just saw a therapist who specializes in telekinesis. He said, “Tell me about your trauma. No, really, tell me. I can hear you thinking about it.” 🧠🤯
- What do you call a therapeutic massage for someone with emotional baggage? Trauma kneading.💆♀️🧳😂
- My friend’s therapist told him to embrace his mistakes… Now he’s trauma-tized. 🫂😟
- My therapist told me to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. I’m now out of negative thoughts, but the trauma remains the same. 😌🤔
- Never ask a comedian about their childhood… Chances are it was material for their act. 😆🎤
- My therapist said I’m making progress. I told him, “That’s what you said last session! Are you just saying that to trauma-tize me?” 😈
- Started seeing a therapist who’s also a baker. Now our sessions are $200 per trauma-misu. 🍰💰
- My therapist said to journal my feelings. Now my diary is just a collection of trauma-tized scribbles. ✍️😔
- Apparently, self-care is important after a traumatic event. So, I’m heading to get traumatized and tanned. 😎🌴🍹
- My therapist said I needed to confront my past. So I went back in time and gave my younger self a helmet. Safety first! 🪖👶
- Life is full of little traumas. Like that moment you realize you’ve been pronouncing “trauma” wrong your entire life. 🤯 (It’s “traw-ma,” not “trau-ma-ta” 😉)
Okay, but don’t get triggered by the exit.
Well, those jokes were certainly… something to unpack. We know dealing with trauma can be tough, but hopefully, these puns provided a little laughter therapy. If you’re still hungry for more humor, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered! Explore our website for a whole buffet of puns and jokes that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone.
