95+ Headache Puns & Jokes: Guaranteed Relief or Your Migraine Back!

ByRabia Noreen & Team

👋 Hey there, fellow headache sufferers! 😩 We all know the feeling: that pounding pain in your head that makes you want to crawl into a dark hole and disappear. 🤕 But fear not, because laughter is the best medicine! 😂 (Well, laughter and maybe some ibuprofen…). We’ve compiled a list of the best headache jokes, puns, and funny anecdotes – some clever, some for kids – that will hopefully lift your spirits… or at the very least, distract you from the pain. 😅 Get ready for some serious humor! 💯

Top Headache Jokes – Best Picks

  1. My doctor gave me such a long list of headache triggers, it gave me a headache! I guess you could say it was a self-fulfilling prescription.
  2. How do trees in crowded forests deal with headaches? They go see a branch manager.
  3. Why are fish so good at handling headaches? They’ve got schools of aspirin!
  4. I went to the doctor about my headache, and he said, “You need to think less.” That’s when the real headache started.
  5. My headache medicine is like a bad employee. It keeps saying it’s going to work, but nothing ever gets done.
  6. I told my doctor I get a headache every time I try to learn a new language. He said, “Sounds like a migraine-lingual problem.”
  7. My headache has been so bad, I’ve been having suicidal thoughts. Then I remembered: “Kill the headache, not yourself.”
  8. You know what they call a headache in Germany? A “Kopfweh”. Don’t worry, I don’t get it either.
  9. My friend keeps telling me his new job is a real headache. I told him, “Maybe you’re just not using the right tools.”
  10. What did the aspirin say to the headache? “I’m here to split!”
  11. I used to think my smartphone caused my headaches. Turns out, it was just my head in the phone all the time.
Ultimate collection of Best Headache Jokes and Puns, One-liners, Dad Jokes, Funny Quotes, and Captions - Discover engaging and humorous content at PunnyHub.com

Clever Headache Puns – Best Picks

  1. My therapist told me to visualize my happy place whenever I get a headache. Now I just see a blank page with the words “Error 404: Happy Place Not Found.”
  2. Why did the headache go to the party alone? It couldn’t find anyone to take it with a grain of salt.
  3. I started a band called Migraine. We mostly play in dimly lit basements.
  4. My doctor told me I have a tension headache. I told him I wasn’t tense, just incredibly suspicious of everyone in the room.
  5. Headaches are like bad roommates; they show up unannounced and overstay their welcome.
  6. I tried to write a song about my headache, but the chorus was just me groaning softly for 4 minutes.
  7. I’m thinking about naming my headache. Any suggestions? I’m leaning towards “Steve.”
  8. You know you have a real headache when even your hair hurts.
  9. My head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton wool. I guess I have a “head-cold.”
  10. Headaches: proof that even our brains need a break sometimes.
  11. What do you call a headache that refuses to leave? A headstrong-ache.
  12. My headache is so bad, I can’t even think straight. Or maybe I never could, hard to tell at this point.
  13. I’m not saying my headache is bad, but I’m starting to hear colors and see sounds.

Funny Headache One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Headache Jokes

  1. I went to the doctor for my recurring headaches, turns out it was just a pain in the neck… literally.
  2. My friend said his headaches were gone thanks to essential oils. I guess you could say he’s really frankin-scents.
  3. You know what they call a headache in Germany? A kopf-ache!
  4. My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. Now I have a headache, because it came back with a vengeance… and a lawyer.
  5. Headaches are a real pain… in the head.
  6. I used to think my computer gave me headaches, then I realized it was just my monitor holding me back.
  7. My doctor said my headaches stemmed from my unhealthy obsession with clocks. I guess you could say I’m always wound up.
  8. I told my friend my therapist thinks my headaches are from bottled-up anger. He suggested I let it all out. Now I have a bigger headache and I owe him a new keyboard.
  9. Dealing with a headache is like trying to understand JavaScript, it’s a real head-scratcher.
  10. My friend told me he gets rid of headaches by banging his head against the wall. I guess it works because he’s always got a smile on his face… or maybe that’s just the concussion.
  11. What do you call a headache that just won’t quit? A real pain in the neck-uitis.
  12. I went to a seminar on how to avoid headaches. Turns out, I should have just stayed home.
  13. My therapist told me to visualize my happy place to get rid of my headache. Now I have two problems.
  14. I tried to explain to my headache that I needed it to leave, but it wouldn’t listen. It must have been a migraine-communication issue.

Headache QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Headache

  1. Q: Why did the math book give the student a headache? A: It had too many problems.
  2. Q: What do you call a headache that’s always hanging around? A: A pain in the neck!
  3. Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award for his headache relief invention? A: He was outstanding in his field!
  4. Q: What do you call a headache in space? A: A mete-oar!
  5. Q: Why did the computer get a headache? A: It had a terminal case of information overload.
  6. Q: Why are fish never stressed? A: They don’t take things at face value, they just go with the flow, and they’re always down for a little “sea-esta.” No time for headaches there!
  7. Q: What’s a vampire’s biggest fear during a blood drive? A: Getting a stake through the head… Talk about a splitting headache!
  8. Q: I went to the doctor about my headache, and all he did was give me this weird hat with holes in it and told me to wear it for a week. What gives? A: Sounds like you got the “bucket-over-your-head-itis” diagnosis. It’s very rare.
  9. Q: How do trees in the forest get rid of a headache? A: With asprin-bark!
  10. Q: Why did the bicycle fall over? A: Because it was twoTIRED! And it had a wheel-y bad headache.
  11. Q: My doctor said I need to take this medication on an empty stomach. What should I do with the bottle after I take it? A: I don’t know, that sounds like a headache for future you!
  12. Q: Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? A: Too many cheetahs! And because the elephants always get a trumpeting headache from the noise.
  13. Q: Why did the artist have a headache after painting the barn? A: He used too many strokes!
  14. Q: My headache is so bad, I think I need to see a psychic. A: Don’t bother, they only deal with migraines from the future.

Dad Jokes About Headache: Pun-Filled Quips

  1. You know what they call a headache in Germany? Aachen.
  2. I went to the doctor for my splitting headache. He said, “Try these new pills. They’re excedrin-ally effective!”
  3. My friend said, “My headache is killing me!” I told him, “Don’t worry, it’s probably just ibuprofen-rated.”
  4. What do you call a headache that just won’t quit? A real pain in the neck!
  5. A guy walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia. The librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
  6. Why did the aspirin go to art school? It wanted to be a pain-ter.
  7. My headache medicine isn’t working. Guess I’ll just have to tough it out-side.
  8. What’s the difference between a headache and a drummer? You can tune a drum.
  9. What do you call a cow with a headache? A steak-head.
  10. My wife asked why whenever she has a headache, I don’t seem to care. I said, “That’s a real head-scratcher!”
  11. My friend says, “I can’t believe my insurance doesn’t cover acupuncture for headaches.” I said, “Well, that’s a bit of a needle-ess expense!”
  12. What do you get when you cross a head with a breadstick? A loaf-ache!

Headache Jokes and Puns for Kids

  1. Why did the math book give the student a headache? Because it was full of problems!
  2. What did the teddy bear say to his friend with a headache? “I hope you feel beary soon!”
  3. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was twoTIRED! (and gave everyone a headache!)
  4. What’s the worst thing about getting a ‘splitting’ headache? Knowing you have to share it with yourself!
  5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field… even though all that sun gave him a headache!
  6. What’s a vampire’s worst headache called? A grave migraine!
  7. Why do firefighters never get headaches? They know how to deal with pressure!
  8. What do you call a headache in outer space? A meteor-oid pain!
  9. Why did the music teacher need aspirin? Because her students were all playing out of tune, and it was driving her crazy!
  10. Where do pencils go on vacation when they need to relax? Pencil-vania! They need a break from all that writing.
  11. How do bees get to school? They take the school buzz! It’s a bit bumpy, can give you a headache!
  12. What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A tuba toothpaste! (But listening to it might give you a headache!)

Headache Jokes and Puns for Elders

  1. My doctor told me to take these new pills for my headaches. Apparently, they’re cutting-edge technology. I just wish they came with a discount for seniors.
  2. Why did the retired hairdresser refuse to work on the headache? She said, “I don’t do tension anymore, honey, I’m strictly highlights now.”
  3. I used to think my memory was going bad… then I realized I can still remember every single headache I’ve ever had.
  4. My grandkids gave me a stress ball for my headaches, but I don’t think they understand. It’s not like I can squeeze my age-related anxieties away that easily!
  5. I told my doctor I wanted a second opinion on my headache. He said, “Fine, you’re ugly too.”
  6. You know, getting old is a pain… literally. Where did I put that aspirin bottle again?
  7. I went to the library to find a good book on migraines. Turns out, they were all checked out! Must be a real headache for someone else now.
  8. I finally figured out the difference between a good day and a bad day. On a good day, the only thing pounding is my heart.
  9. My doctor suggested yoga for my tension headaches. Apparently, “downward dog” is not a good look for me.
  10. My friend told me I should try acupuncture for my headaches. I told him, “No way, needles are a real pain in the…” well, you get the idea.
  11. My retirement plan? Try to have fewer headaches than hot flashes. So far, it’s a tie.
  12. I think my new hearing aid is giving me headaches. Or maybe it’s just my grandkids blasting that new-fangled music.
  13. I tried explaining to my grandson that my head felt like it was in a vice. He said, “What’s a vice, Grandpa?” Ah, the bliss of ignorance.
  14. You know you’re getting old when… the only thing younger than your headache is the expiration date on your aspirin.

Headache Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media

  1. Just got dumped. My heart says it’s over, but my head…ache. 😔😂
  2. Why did the ibuprofen break up with the headache? Because it couldn’t handle the pressure! 💊💔
  3. I used to think my opinions mattered. Then I realized they were just giving everyone a headache. 🤔🤯
  4. My brain is like Google Maps right now. Can’t find a route to avoid this headache. 🧠🗺️🤕
  5. This headache is so bad, I feel like I’m living in a constant state of “Wait, what was I doing again?” 😵‍💫🤔
  6. You know you have a real headache when even your hair hurts. 😩😩😩
  7. My head is pounding so hard, I think I’m eligible for a drum solo in Metallica. 🤘🤕🥁
  8. Headache: The body’s way of telling you to go lie down in the dark and scroll through memes. 🛌📱😂
  9. Relationship status: It’s complicated. Mostly just a headache. 💔🤨
  10. Me trying to explain to my headache that I have things to do today. 🗣️😠🤕
  11. My brain during a headache feels like popcorn kernels popping…but instead of fluffiness, there’s just pain. 🍿💥🤕
  12. My therapist told me to embrace my inner child. Right now, my inner child just wants its sippy cup and to cry about this headache. 👶🍼😭
  13. Headache: Because adulting is just a series of stressful decisions punctuated by excruciating pain. 😩😭😂
  14. Does anyone else get headaches that are so bad, they have their own theme music? Because mine is definitely heavy metal. 🤘🤕🎶
  15. I tried to fight this headache with positive vibes… It just laughed and pulsed harder. 🧘‍♀️😠🤕

Head On Out, These Puns Are Killer! 😜

Well, we’ve reached the end of our pun-derful journey, and we hope these headache jokes haven’t left you feeling too…achy. If you’re still in the mood for some side-splitting silliness, be sure to check out the rest of our punny website. We’ve got jokes to cure even the worst case of the boredom blues!

Rabia Noreen & Team

Rabia Noreen: The Punnovator

Hi, I'm Rabia, the lead punster behind PunnyHub.com, alongside my incredible team. With a background in Comparative Literature, I specialize in turning phrases and crafting chuckles. My team and I are committed to delivering humor that not only entertains but enlightens. Every post we share is designed to sprinkle your day with laughter and a dash of wit. Find your Best Puns & Jokes.

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