135+ Pencil Puns & Jokes: Have You Heard These?
✏️ Get ready to laugh your pencils off! 🤣 This list of the best pencil puns and jokes is packed with enough humor to make your funny bone tickle. Whether you’re a kid or just young at heart, these clever and positive jokes about pencils are sure to leave you feeling sharp! 💯 Get ready for some seriously punny business – let’s get this graphite party started! 🎉
Top ‘Pencil Jokes’ – Best Picks
- Why did the pencil get a promotion at the bank? Because it was always outstanding in its field!
- What’s a pencil’s favorite genre of music? Anything metal!
- Why did the pencil fail its driving test? It kept going over the write lines!
- What did the artist say to the rebellious pencil? “Hey, don’t get lead astray!”
- Why are pencils always invited to parties? Because they know how to draw a crowd!
- Did you hear about the pencil that was always stressed? It was constantly under a lot of pressure!
- I used to have a job making pencils… But then it got pointed out I wasn’t cut out for it.
- Why are pencils so honest? They always give you their 2B or not 2B.
- What’s a pencil’s favorite type of food? Shortbread! Because it comes with a short, sweet point.
- Why did the pencil cross the road? To get to the sharpener on the other side – it was feeling a bit dull.
- What did the pencil say to the paper when it was falling in love? “I’m falling for you… literally!”
- What do you call a pencil that’s always getting into trouble? A lead-headed troublemaker!
- What’s the difference between a train and a pencil? A train says “choo-choo” and a pencil says “look sharp”!
- How do you make a pencil disappear? Just add a “w” – now it’s a weapon!
- My friend said he was going to write a book with a pencil… I told him to get ready for a long haul!
- What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra with a pencil sticking out of it!
- Why did the pencil lose the court case? It had no point!
- What did the pencil say to the eraser? “I’m sorry, I can’t live without you – I make too many mistakes!”
Clever ‘Pencil Puns’ – Best Picks
- I’m ‘lead’ing’ towards believing this pencil is magic. It keeps disappearing!
- This pencil sharpener really ‘gets the point.’
- What do you call a pencil that can tell the future? A proph-pencil!
- I broke my pencil in half. Guess I’ll have to make it work ‘write’ now.
- Pencils are always getting into ‘point’less arguments.
- You know you’re a true artist when you can make a pencil sketch look ‘graphite.’
- I saw a robbery at the pencil factory today… They made off with the ‘lead’!
- My pencil collection is always ‘growing.’
- What’s a pencil’s favorite genre? ‘Lead’ Zeppelin!
- My friend tried to convince me he’s related to a pencil. I told him, “Don’t ‘sketch’ me out.”
- I’m starting to think this eraser is jealous of my pencil. It keeps ‘rubbing’ it in my face.
- Being a pencil is tough. It’s literally a life of ‘ups’ and ‘downs.’
- You can always ‘count’ on a pencil to help you out.
- The pencil felt ‘drawn’ to the paper, it was love at first ‘write.’
- Don’t tell anyone, but I think my pencil has a ‘crush’ on my sharpener.
- This pencil has been through a lot. It’s got a real ‘story’ to tell.
- That pencil is always so sharp, it must have a ‘point’ to prove.
- I’m not very good at drawing, but my pencil sketches are ‘getting there.’
- Life is like a pencil, you never know when it’s going to be ‘short’ and ‘sweet.’
Funny ‘Pencil One-Liner Jokes’ – Short & Funny Pencil Jokes
- I saw a robbery at the pencil factory today… the suspect took the lead.
- Pencils are always getting into trouble – they’re always getting lead astray.
- You know, I bought this fancy pencil for a dollar… it was a real bargain sale.
- My friend said he wanted a job making pencils… I told him it was easy, he just had to put his mind to it.
- Pencils are like bad habits… they’re easy to pick up but hard to put down.
- Why are pencils always so organized? They know how to stay in line.
- Did you hear about the pencil that went to art school? It’s now a well-drawn out character!
- Always use a pencil for math… because it’s okay to make mistakes.
- Never argue with a pencil, they always have a point.
- Life is like a pencil, you never know when it’s going to be short.
- Pencils are so dramatic… everything is always point of no return.
- Being a pencil is tough… it’s literally all about the lead role.
- I’m writing a horror story about a haunted pencil… it’s full of suspense.
- What’s a pencil’s favorite genre? Anything, as long as it’s well-written!
- Pencils are always getting into trouble… they have such a lead foot.
- I tried to write with a broken pencil earlier… but there was no point.
- That pencil is always getting picked on… guess you could say he’s deeply affected.
- Pencils sure are creative… I hear they’re always coming up with new points.
- I feel sorry for pencils… they’re always getting used and never appreciated. They deserve a hand. Let me know if you’d like me to keep writing! I’m full of lead (pun intended!)
Pencil QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Pencil
- Q: Why did the pencil get a promotion at work? A: Because it was always outstanding in its field!
- Q: What’s a pencil’s favorite type of music? A: Anything with a good beat and lead!
- Q: Why was the pencil always invited to parties? A: It knew how to draw a crowd!
- Q: What did the pencil say to the paper when it was falling in love? A: I’ll never let you go… without a trace!
- Q: Why did the pencil fail its driving test? A: It kept going over the write-off limit!
- Q: What’s a pencil’s worst nightmare? A: A spelling bee!
- Q: What do you get when a pencil goes to art school? A: A well-drawn portrait!
- Q: Why are pencils so creative? A: They’re always coming up with bright ideas!
- Q: What’s a pencil’s favorite genre of books? A: Anything with a gripping plot!
- Q: How do you make a pencil rich? A: Give it lots of lead investments!
- Q: Why did the pencil get sent to the principal’s office? A: It was caught drawing on the desks!
- Q: What did the pencil say when it made a mistake? A: Well, that’s just my point of view!
- Q: What do you call a pencil that’s always getting into trouble? A: A lead-head!
- Q: Why don’t they allow pencils at the bank? A: They’re afraid someone will try to erase their debt!
- Q: How do pencils greet each other? A: With a friendly “write” this way!
- Q: What did the pencil say to the paper after a fight? A: Look, I’m sorry I rubbed you the wrong way.
- Q: Why did the pencil break up with the eraser? A: Because it said their relationship had no future!
- Q: How does a pencil get to work? A: On the graphite-tation!
- Q: What’s a pencil’s favorite sport? A: Golf! It loves getting a hole-in-one.
- Q: What’s a pencil’s life motto? A: “Always make your mark on the world!”
Dad Jokes About Pencil: Pun-Filled Quips
- What did the pencil say to the paper? Looking sharp!
- I saw a robbery at the pencil factory today, but luckily, no one got hurt. They just took the lead.
- Where do pencils go for vacation? Pencil-vania!
- My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. So I took it to the movies and bought it a pencil so it could take notes for its web design class.
- What’s a pencil’s favorite genre? Graphic novels, of course!
- I used to hate writing with a pencil. But then it grew on me.
- I bought a 20-foot pencil the other day. It was quite the write-off!
- You know, I used to be addicted to the eraser on the pencil, but then I got clean.
- Why did the pencil get detention? It was caught lead-ing others astray!
- What did the pencil sharpener say to the dull pencil? “Have you lost your point?”
- Did you hear about the magical pencil? It turned into a plant! Turns out it was a plan-cil all along!
- My son asked for help with his geometry homework. I said, “Sure, just give me a minute to draw on my experience.” He said, “Dad, you can’t use a pencil on experience!”
- Two pencils got in a fight. It was pointless. They should have just drawn their weapons and gotten it over with.
- What’s a ghost’s favorite writing tool? A 2B pencil, because it’s already half-dead!
- I met a pencil today that was feeling really down. It said it wasn’t feeling very sharp.
- I bought a talking pencil the other day. It was amazing! Too bad it only knew how to say, “Hey, put the cap back on!”
- Why don’t they allow pencils at the bank? Because they’re always trying to draw out money!
Pencil Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the pencil get a bad grade in school? Because it was always getting lead out!
- What’s a pencil’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat and lead guitar!
- Why did the pencil break up with the eraser? Because he said their relationship had no point!
- What do you call a happy pencil? A-point-ly in love!
- Where does a pencil go on vacation? Pencil-vania!
- Why was the pencil always invited to parties? Because he knew how to draw a crowd!
- What did the pencil say to the paper? I’m falling for you!
- Why did the pencil get in trouble at school? Because it was caught write-handed!
- What’s a pencil’s favorite game to play? Connect the dots!
- What do you call a pencil that’s always making mistakes? A lead-head!
- Where do pencils sleep? In the pencil box, of course!
- Why did the artist give the pencil a hug? Because it was always there to draw-port him!
- What’s black and white and read all over? A newspaper! (But a pencil wrote it!)
- Why did the pencil get sent to the principal’s office? For doodling during class!
- What did the pencil say to the sharpener? “Give me a point, I’m feeling dull!”
- How do you make a pencil disappear? Just add paper and start drawing, it’ll vanish before your eyes!
- What’s a pencil’s favorite sport? Anything with a sharp point system!
- Why don’t they allow pencils at the bank? Because they always try to draw money!
Pencil Jokes and Puns for Adults
- Why did the pencil get fired from the art studio? Because it couldn’t draw the line between being creative and inappropriate.
- You know you’re an adult when you get excited about a new pencil… because it means you have something to write down all the bills with.
- A pencil sharpener is basically a stationery dominatrix. It likes it rough, and always leaves you shorter than before.
- I tried to explain to my pencil what a “midlife crisis” was. It just snapped under the pressure.
- Dating a pencil is tough. It’s all black and white, and there’s no erasing the past.
- They say a picture is worth a thousand words. But a pencil drawing of your ex is worth a thousand restraining orders.
- What’s a writer’s favorite position? Pencil-tration.
- My therapist told me to use my words instead of being passive aggressive. Now I just write snarky comments on sticky notes with my pencil.
- I’m not saying my life is pointless, but… I could use a good sharpening right about now.
- Why did the pencil cross the road? To prove it wasn’t lead-footed.
- My friend said he wanted to be reincarnated as a pencil in his next life. I told him that was a graphite idea.
- I bought a self-help book written entirely in pencil. It said, “You can erase your problems, but you can’t erase your bad decisions.”
- What’s the most dangerous pencil in the world? A lead pipe.
- You can tell a lot about a person by how they hold their pencil. Unless they’re using it to pick the lock on your diary.
- Why are pencils so bad at keeping secrets? They’re always getting lead out.
- My therapist told me to draw what happiness looks like to me. So I drew a giant paycheck and a pencil sharpener that actually works.
- Life is like a pencil. It’s full of ups and downs, but eventually, it gets shorter and blunter. Just make sure you leave your mark.
Pencil Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media
- Just saw a robbery at the pencil factory. The thieves got away with a million lead! 👮♀️🚨
- What did the pencil say to the paper when it was falling in love? I’m falling for you! 🥰📝
- I’m starting a pencil sharpening business… I think it’s got a point. 😉✏️
- Why did the pencil fail its driving test? It couldn’t stay in the lines! 😂🚗
- My therapist told me to draw my problems… Now I just have smaller problems. 😅✍️
- Why are pencils always so broke? They work for peanuts! 🥜😩
- You know you’re a writer when you get excited about a brand new box of pencils. 🤩📦
- What’s a pencil’s favorite genre? Graphic novels! 📚✏️
- I’m not sure how to use this voice-activated pencil… What should I say? 🤔🗣️
- Pencils are proof that even the smallest things can leave a mark on the world. 🌎🙏
- Why did the pencil cross the road? To get to the shading on the other side! 🦓🖍️
- Don’t be afraid to make mistakes… That’s what erasers are for! Just like pencils, we all need a little help sometimes. 💖✏️ eraser
- I’m convinced my pencil has a mind of its own… Every time I try to write a story, it goes lead me astray! 🚶♂️✏️
- Why did the pencil get fired from the bank? It lost all its interest! 🏦💸
- What do you call a pencil that’s always complaining? A lead-belly! 😂😭
- Life is like a pencil: You get shorter with experience, but you also leave your mark on the world. 🌎✍️
- I saw a pencil fight a pen once… It was pointless. 🥊🖊️
- My friend said he wanted a job making pencils. I told him it was pointless. 🤷♀️💼
- Just bought a self-sharpening pencil. It’s looking pretty sharp! 😎✨
Sharpen your humor, these puns really leaded the way!
We hope these pencil puns and jokes didn’t lead you down a dull path! If you’re feeling sharpened for more punny fun, don’t erase this moment from your memory – sketch out some time to explore the rest of our website for a whole drawing board of hilarious puns and jokes!