106+ Molly Jokes & Puns: You’ve Officially Been Mollified!
π Hey there, humor hunters! π€ͺ Get ready to dive into the best collection of Molly jokes and puns this side of the internet! π This is where clever wordplay meets side-splitting humor β perfect for kids and adults who love a good laugh. We’ve got a list of knee-slapping, groan-worthy, and downright funny puns that’ll have you saying, “Holy Molly, that’s a good one!” π€£ Let’s get this pun party started! π
Top Molly Jokes – Best Picks
- Why don’t they play poker in the rainforest? Too many cheetahs… and too much Molly.
- I met a girl named Molly at a party last night. She told me she was a collector. “What do you collect?” I asked. “Oh, mostly debts,” she replied.
- What did the ocean say to Molly the mountain? Nothing, it just waved.
- Why didn’t Molly do well in her history class? She got stuck in the present.
- Why did Molly bring a ladder to the party? Because she heard the drinks were on the house!
- I used to date a girl named Molly who was obsessed with clocks. A real ticking time bomb, I tell ya.
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato…or maybe just Molly.
- Why did Molly bring a pencil to every party? In case she needed to draw her own conclusions.
- Someone stole my mood ring, and I have no idea how I feel about it! On the bright side, Molly stole my calendar, so now I’m living in the moment.
- Why was Molly constantly getting lost in libraries? She could never find her place.
- Did you hear about Molly the fortune teller who was arrested? Apparently, she was charged with predicting the future… of a police officer’s donut.
- What do you call a group of disorganized cats? A cat-astrophy… or maybe just Molly’s house.
- What does Molly always say when she answers the phone? “You’ve reached the right person, but I’m not sure what you were expecting me to do about it!”
- I told Molly I was reading a book about anti-gravity. She just rolled her eyes and said, “Sounds pretty boring.”
- Why don’t they trust atoms? Because they make up everything… especially Molly’s excuses.
Clever Molly Puns – Best Picks
- Feeling peckish? You should try my guacamole. It’s the guac to my Molly.
- My friend Molly keeps all her money in a shoebox. I guess you could say she has a sole-proprietorship.
- Molly started a band called “The Dependent Clauses.” They’re not very popular; they’re always grammatically incorrect.
- Molly’s a skilled archer, but she refuses to use carbon arrows. She says they lack Molly-cules.
- Ever noticed how messy Molly’s sock drawer is? Yeah, it’s a real molly-strom in there.
- Molly’s such a good bowler, she never needs to use the bumpers. She calls it bowling sans frontieres, or bowling Molly-free.
- Molly made a fortune selling calendars in France. Seems there was a huge demand for the “Molly”-an calendar.
- Molly makes terrible coffee. I asked her what her secret was, she whispered, “I add a pinch of salt.” Now I know why it tastes so…Molly.
- Molly’s learning to code. She said she wants to create apps that are both functional and stylish. She’s calling it “design with a touch of Molly.”
- I asked Molly, “What’s your favorite board game?” She said, “Monopoly, but only when I get to be the banker.” Guess you could say she likes to handle the “Molly-opoly” money.
- Molly’s taking astronomy classes. She says she wants to be the first person to discover a new constellation shaped like a rubber duck. She’s calling it “The Molly-llary Constellation.”
- Molly tried to make sushi, but it fell apart. She said, “I guess I used too much rice.” I told her, “No, you just need more practice. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and sushi isn’t rolled on the first try, Molly.”
- Molly’s a terrible liar. Her poker face is so transparent, you can practically see right through her. It’s like playing with an open book, or should I say, playing with an open “Molly-cule.”
- Molly’s going on a trip to Hawaii. She’s excited to try surfing, but she’s a little nervous about the waves. I told her, “Don’t worry, just go with the flow. Ride those waves like you’re riding a giant, blue, saltwater Molly-coaster!”
- Molly sprained her ankle dancing. I told her, “Well, that’s what you get for trying to break the Molly.”
Funny Molly One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Molly Jokes
- Molly said she wanted a pet that really stood out, so I got her a chameleon with a mohawk.
- I met a girl named Molly at a tech conference. Turns out, she was a full-stack developer…and a full-stack eater at the buffet.
- Molly’s a whiz at solving Rubik’s Cubes…blindfolded. She says it’s all about feel.
- Never invite Molly to a poker night. She’s got a real tell…she always smiles when she’s bluffing.
- Molly’s dating life is like a game of Tetris…always falling for the wrong blocks.
- Molly’s dream job? To be a writer for a fortune cookie company. She’s got a real knack for crafting short, sweet nothings.
- “I want to travel the world,” Molly declared. “Good,” I replied, “then we have something in common. Your suitcase is already halfway there.”
- Molly’s such a talented artist, she can draw a crowd just by sketching on a napkin.
- I asked Molly what her favorite dance move was. She said, “The one where I walk away from drama.”
- Someone told Molly she was “two sandwiches short of a picnic.” She just shrugged and said, “More for me then.”
- Molly’s secret to success? “Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else.”
- I asked Molly how her diet was going. She said, “It’s going great…if the goal was to become a professional snacker.”
- Molly’s idea of a perfect date? A night in, binge-watching documentaries about things neither of them understands.
Molly QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Molly
- Q: Why did Molly bring a ladder to the library? A: She heard the shelves were stacked with great reads!
- Q: What did Molly say when she opened her bakery? A: “Let’s get this bread, rolling!”
- Q: Why did Molly blush when the gardener gave her a compliment? A: He said she had the most beautiful flowering thyme!
- Q: Where does Molly go for a good laugh on the weekend? A: To the comedy cellar! She heard it’s full of fun-ghi.
- Q: What’s Molly’s favorite musical instrument? A: The triangle, because she’s always up for a good chime!
- Q: Why did Molly win an award for patience? A: She’s got the waiting game down to a fine art!
- Q: Why was Molly so tired after her day at the museum? A: She spent hours in the Ancient Egyptian exhibit saying “Tomb it may concern…”
- Q: Why is Molly such a good detective? A: She always cracks the case!
- Q: What do you call a magic trick performed by a sheepdog named Molly? A: A Collie-dastly illusion!
- Q: What did Molly say when she saw the price of concert tickets? A: “Well, that’s a bit steep, even for a high note!”
- Q: Why did Molly bring a pencil to the art museum? A: She wanted to draw her own conclusions!
- Q: How does Molly like her coffee? A: Seriously strong, because she’s got a latte on her plate!
- Q: Why don’t they let Molly play cards in the rainforest? A: Because she’s always trying to turn over a new leaf!
- Q: Where does Molly go to find her missing keys? A: To the Lost & Keychain!
- Q: What did Molly say when she saw the rainbow? A: “Well, that’s just prism and proper!”
Dad Jokes About Molly: Pun-Filled Quips
- Molly asked me to name two fish that were always togetherβ¦ I said, “Roe-mance isn’t dead, it’s Fin-tastic!”
- You know, Molly makes amazing coffee, but I had to draw the line when she asked if I wanted it intravenously. Talk about a strong brew!
- Molly said she wanted to be a pastry chef, but couldn’t handle the pie-pressure. Now sheβs just rolling along with it.
- Went to a seafood restaurant with Molly. She ordered escargot, but wouldn’t touch the food. Turns out, she only likes snails on the molly-go-round!
- Molly’s got a green thumb, but she cried when her cactus died. Guess you could say she was really feeling prickly.
- Molly’s a whiz in the kitchen. Her secret ingredient? It’s all in the wrist… and maybe a pinch of “molly”-cular gastronomy, haha!
- Molly’s always losing her keys. I tell her she needs a new key-chain… of events! Maybe then she’ll be more careful.
- Molly tripped on a pile of dirt today. I said, “What happened? Did you lose your balance?” She just rolled her eyes.
- Molly said she wanted to learn how to make pottery. I said, “Go for it! It’ll be clay-tastic!”
- Went furniture shopping with Molly. Every time she sat on a couch, I’d say, “That one looks like a keeper, Molly-cule!”
- Molly got a job at a clock factory. Now she gets paid time-and-a-half for working overtime. She’s really cleaning up!
- Took Molly out to a fancy restaurant. She said, “This food is exquisite!” I said, “They must have a great mollusk-cular gastronomy chef!”
- Molly keeps telling me to try this new dance called the Electric Slide. I told her Iβm not sure I have the right moves. Maybe I just need to get amped!
Molly Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the little clam need Molly’s help? Because she was stuck in a tight Mollusc-situation!
- What did the grumpy bear say when Molly asked if he had seen her teddy? “I haven’t seen your teddy, and frankly my dear, I don’t give a Mollycule!”
- What did Molly say when she found a talking frog? “Well, this is un-toad-ally amazing!”
- Why was Molly so good at hide and seek? She had the perfect hiding Moll-spot!
- What did Molly name her pet goldfish? Finneas, because he was always fin-tastic company!
- Why did Molly wear a raincoat to the beach? Just in case there were Molly-cular showers!
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Molly! Molly who? Molly, it’s time for dinner! Come on in!
- What do you call a happy strawberry? A berry good time, just like hanging out with Molly!
- Why did Molly get lost in the library? She took a wrong turn and ended up in the Moll-tiple choice section!
- What did the clock say to Molly? Listen carefully because I’m only going to tell you this one-molle-llion times!
- Whatβs Molly’s favorite type of music? Anything but organ music, itβs just not her style!
- What’s Molly’s favorite board game? Moll-opoly of course!
- What did Molly say to the bee that landed on her flower? Buzz off, this is my blossoming moment!”
Molly Jokes and Puns for Elders
- My grandson tried to tell me “Molly” was a type of music festival. I said, “Back in my day, we called those ‘police raids’.”
- Why did Molly refuse to go to the antique auction? She heard things were getting a little too vintage for her liking.
- Doctor told me my cholesterol was high, but I shouldn’t worry too much about it. Guess I’m just living that high Molly life.
- Heard they’re making a new dating app specifically for seniors called “Carbon Dating.” I think I’d prefer one called “Molly Matchmaker” – sounds more exciting.
- My friend told me I should try yoga for my arthritis. I said, “Yoga? Darling, I’ve been doing poses since before they invented Molly!”
- Tried to explain Bitcoin to my bridge group. They looked at me like I suggested we all take Molly and go clubbing.
- Remember Woodstock? Now that was a music festival! We didnβt need any fancy Mollyβ¦ just someβ¦ “herbal refreshments.” wink wink
- I told my doctor I was feeling my age. He said, “How old do you feel?” I said, “Depends, are we talking chronologically or in Molly years?”
- My neighbor got arrested at the bingo hall for dealing… Molly, apparently. Who knew bingo could get so wild?
- What’s the difference between me and this new generation? I got high naturally. Sunshine, fresh air… okay, maybe a little disco dust. winks mischievously
- Why did Molly bring a ladder to the retirement home dance? She heard it was going to be “lit.”
- Retirement is the perfect time to try all the things you never had time for. Just finished my first rave. Now, where’s that Tums?
- I’m at that age where I need a pill organizer just to keep track of my medications. Which section do I put the “Molly” in again? sly grin
- What’s the difference between a rocking chair and Molly? I don’t need to find a dealer to get a rocking chair.
- My grandkids think they invented partying. Honey, please. Just wait ’til your knees don’t pop every time you get up to dance.
Molly Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- Just met a girl named Molly at a tech conference. Turns out she’s an expert in molecular data storage. Guess you could say she’s a real… data Molly. (plays on “data mining”)
- Heard about the kidnapping at the sewing school? Don’t worry, they found her. She was being held for ransom Molly. (plays on “ransom money”)
- Why did Molly bring a ladder to the library? Because she heard the books were on shelves, Molly! (plays on “south, Molly”)
- Never play poker with a gardener named Molly. They always seem to have the hoe-ly grail of hands. (plays on “holy grail”)
- I asked Molly what her favorite Shakespeare play was. She said, “As You Like It, Molly”! (plays on “as you like it”)
- Molly’s always the life of the party… even when she’s the designated driver. She’s the ultimate party Molly. (plays on “party animal”)
- My dog Molly is learning to code. She’s really good at fetching byte-sized information. (plays on “bite-sized”)
- My doctor friend Molly just got back from a conference in the Alps. She’s such a medi-cal climber! (plays on “medical” and “mountain climber”)
- Tried to make small talk with Molly at the gym, but she wasn’t having it. Guess you could say she ghosted, Molly. (plays on “ghosting” someone)
- Molly started a band called “The Periodic Tables.” They’re always looking for an element of surprise. (plays on chemical elements)
- My grandma Molly just got her first smartphone! She’s already sent me 20 selfies and a link to a chain letter. This is gonna be a wild ride, Molly! (plays on “wild ride”)
- Molly said she wanted a career where she could work from anywhere in the world. I told her, “The world’s your oyster, Molly!” (plays on “the world is your oyster”)
- Molly tried to make ramen in the coffee machine… let’s just say it was not very souper, Molly. (plays on “not very super”)
- What do you call a motivational speaker who’s also a baker? A real inspiration, Molly! (plays on “inspiration, honey!”)
That’s All, Folks! Molly Outta Here!
Well, there you have it, folks! Enough Molly jokes to turn your chuckle into a full-blown guffaw. If you’re still craving more pun-derful humor, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Head over to our website for a treasure trove of jokes that’ll tickle your funny bone ’til it mollifies!