106+ Molly Jokes & Puns: You’ve Officially Been Mollified!
👋 Hey there, humor hunters! 🤪 Get ready to dive into the best collection of Molly jokes and puns this side of the internet! 😂 This is where clever wordplay meets side-splitting humor – perfect for kids and adults who love a good laugh. We’ve got a list of knee-slapping, groan-worthy, and downright funny puns that’ll have you saying, “Holy Molly, that’s a good one!” 🤣 Let’s get this pun party started! 🎉
Top Molly Jokes – Best Picks
Why don’t they play poker in the rainforest? Too many cheetahs… and too much Molly.
I met a girl named Molly at a party last night. She told me she was a collector. “What do you collect?” I asked. “Oh, mostly debts,” she replied.
What did the ocean say to Molly the mountain? Nothing, it just waved.
Why didn’t Molly do well in her history class? She got stuck in the present.
Why did Molly bring a ladder to the party? Because she heard the drinks were on the house!
I used to date a girl named Molly who was obsessed with clocks. A real ticking time bomb, I tell ya.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato…or maybe just Molly.
Why did Molly bring a pencil to every party? In case she needed to draw her own conclusions.
Why was Molly constantly getting lost in libraries? She could never find her place.
Did you hear about Molly the fortune teller who was arrested? Apparently, she was charged with predicting the future… of a police officer’s donut.
What do you call a group of disorganized cats? A cat-astrophy… or maybe just Molly’s house.
What does Molly always say when she answers the phone? “You’ve reached the right person, but I’m not sure what you were expecting me to do about it!”
I told Molly I was reading a book about anti-gravity. She just rolled her eyes and said, “Sounds pretty boring.”
Why don’t they trust atoms? Because they make up everything… especially Molly’s excuses.
Clever Molly Puns – Best Picks
Feeling peckish? You should try my guacamole. It’s the guac to my Molly.
My friend Molly keeps all her money in a shoebox. I guess you could say she has a sole-proprietorship.
Molly started a band called “The Dependent Clauses.” They’re not very popular; they’re always grammatically incorrect.
Molly’s a skilled archer, but she refuses to use carbon arrows. She says they lack Molly-cules.
Ever noticed how messy Molly’s sock drawer is? Yeah, it’s a real molly-strom in there.
Molly made a fortune selling calendars in France. Seems there was a huge demand for the “Molly”-an calendar.
Molly makes terrible coffee. I asked her what her secret was, she whispered, “I add a pinch of salt.” Now I know why it tastes so…Molly.
Molly’s learning to code. She said she wants to create apps that are both functional and stylish. She’s calling it “design with a touch of Molly.”
Molly’s taking astronomy classes. She says she wants to be the first person to discover a new constellation shaped like a rubber duck. She’s calling it “The Molly-llary Constellation.”
Molly tried to make sushi, but it fell apart. She said, “I guess I used too much rice.” I told her, “No, you just need more practice. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and sushi isn’t rolled on the first try, Molly.”
Molly’s a terrible liar. Her poker face is so transparent, you can practically see right through her. It’s like playing with an open book, or should I say, playing with an open “Molly-cule.”
Molly sprained her ankle dancing. I told her, “Well, that’s what you get for trying to break the Molly.”
Funny Molly One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Molly Jokes
Molly said she wanted a pet that really stood out, so I got her a chameleon with a mohawk.
I met a girl named Molly at a tech conference. Turns out, she was a full-stack developer…and a full-stack eater at the buffet.
Molly’s a whiz at solving Rubik’s Cubes…blindfolded. She says it’s all about feel.
Never invite Molly to a poker night. She’s got a real tell…she always smiles when she’s bluffing.
Molly’s dating life is like a game of Tetris…always falling for the wrong blocks.
Molly’s dream job? To be a writer for a fortune cookie company. She’s got a real knack for crafting short, sweet nothings.
“I want to travel the world,” Molly declared. “Good,” I replied, “then we have something in common. Your suitcase is already halfway there.”
Molly’s such a talented artist, she can draw a crowd just by sketching on a napkin.
I asked Molly what her favorite dance move was. She said, “The one where I walk away from drama.”
Someone told Molly she was “two sandwiches short of a picnic.” She just shrugged and said, “More for me then.”
Molly’s secret to success? “Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else.”
Molly’s idea of a perfect date? A night in, binge-watching documentaries about things neither of them understands.
Molly QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Molly
Q: Why did Molly bring a ladder to the library? A: She heard the shelves were stacked with great reads!
Q: Why did Molly blush when the gardener gave her a compliment? A: He said she had the most beautiful flowering thyme!
Q: Where does Molly go for a good laugh on the weekend? A: To the comedy cellar! She heard it’s full of fun-ghi.
Q: What’s Molly’s favorite musical instrument? A: The triangle, because she’s always up for a good chime!
Q: Why did Molly win an award for patience? A: She’s got the waiting game down to a fine art!
Q: Why is Molly such a good detective? A: She always cracks the case!
Q: What do you call a magic trick performed by a sheepdog named Molly? A: A Collie-dastly illusion!
Q: What did Molly say when she saw the price of concert tickets? A: “Well, that’s a bit steep, even for a high note!”
Q: Why did Molly bring a pencil to the art museum? A: She wanted to draw her own conclusions!
Q: How does Molly like her coffee? A: Seriously strong, because she’s got a latte on her plate!
Q: Why don’t they let Molly play cards in the rainforest? A: Because she’s always trying to turn over a new leaf!
Q: Where does Molly go to find her missing keys? A: To the Lost & Keychain!
Dad Jokes About Molly: Pun-Filled Quips
Molly asked me to name two fish that were always together… I said, “Roe-mance isn’t dead, it’s Fin-tastic!”
You know, Molly makes amazing coffee, but I had to draw the line when she asked if I wanted it intravenously. Talk about a strong brew!
Went to a seafood restaurant with Molly. She ordered escargot, but wouldn’t touch the food. Turns out, she only likes snails on the molly-go-round!
Molly’s got a green thumb, but she cried when her cactus died. Guess you could say she was really feeling prickly.
Molly’s a whiz in the kitchen. Her secret ingredient? It’s all in the wrist… and maybe a pinch of “molly”-cular gastronomy, haha!
Molly’s always losing her keys. I tell her she needs a new key-chain… of events! Maybe then she’ll be more careful.
Molly tripped on a pile of dirt today. I said, “What happened? Did you lose your balance?” She just rolled her eyes.
Molly said she wanted to learn how to make pottery. I said, “Go for it! It’ll be clay-tastic!”
Molly got a job at a clock factory. Now she gets paid time-and-a-half for working overtime. She’s really cleaning up!
Took Molly out to a fancy restaurant. She said, “This food is exquisite!” I said, “They must have a great mollusk-cular gastronomy chef!”
Molly keeps telling me to try this new dance called the Electric Slide. I told her I’m not sure I have the right moves. Maybe I just need to get amped!
Molly Jokes and Puns for Kids
Why did the little clam need Molly’s help? Because she was stuck in a tight Mollusc-situation!
What did the grumpy bear say when Molly asked if he had seen her teddy? “I haven’t seen your teddy, and frankly my dear, I don’t give a Mollycule!”
What did Molly say when she found a talking frog? “Well, this is un-toad-ally amazing!”
Why was Molly so good at hide and seek? She had the perfect hiding Moll-spot!
What did Molly name her pet goldfish? Finneas, because he was always fin-tastic company!
Why did Molly wear a raincoat to the beach? Just in case there were Molly-cular showers!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Molly! Molly who? Molly, it’s time for dinner! Come on in!
What do you call a happy strawberry? A berry good time, just like hanging out with Molly!
Why did Molly get lost in the library? She took a wrong turn and ended up in the Moll-tiple choice section!
What did the clock say to Molly? Listen carefully because I’m only going to tell you this one-molle-llion times!
What’s Molly’s favorite type of music? Anything but organ music, it’s just not her style!
What’s Molly’s favorite board game? Moll-opoly of course!
What did Molly say to the bee that landed on her flower? Buzz off, this is my blossoming moment!”
Molly Jokes and Puns for Elders
My grandson tried to tell me “Molly” was a type of music festival. I said, “Back in my day, we called those ‘police raids’.”
Doctor told me my cholesterol was high, but I shouldn’t worry too much about it. Guess I’m just living that high Molly life.
Heard they’re making a new dating app specifically for seniors called “Carbon Dating.” I think I’d prefer one called “Molly Matchmaker” – sounds more exciting.
My friend told me I should try yoga for my arthritis. I said, “Yoga? Darling, I’ve been doing poses since before they invented Molly!”
Tried to explain Bitcoin to my bridge group. They looked at me like I suggested we all take Molly and go clubbing.
Remember Woodstock? Now that was a music festival! We didn’t need any fancy Molly… just some… “herbal refreshments.” wink wink
I told my doctor I was feeling my age. He said, “How old do you feel?” I said, “Depends, are we talking chronologically or in Molly years?”
Why did Molly bring a ladder to the retirement home dance? She heard it was going to be “lit.”
Retirement is the perfect time to try all the things you never had time for. Just finished my first rave. Now, where’s that Tums?
I’m at that age where I need a pill organizer just to keep track of my medications. Which section do I put the “Molly” in again? sly grin
What’s the difference between a rocking chair and Molly? I don’t need to find a dealer to get a rocking chair.
My grandkids think they invented partying. Honey, please. Just wait ’til your knees don’t pop every time you get up to dance.
Molly Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
Heard about the kidnapping at the sewing school? Don’t worry, they found her. She was being held for ransom Molly. (plays on “ransom money”)
Why did Molly bring a ladder to the library? Because she heard the books were on shelves, Molly! (plays on “south, Molly”)
Never play poker with a gardener named Molly. They always seem to have the hoe-ly grail of hands. (plays on “holy grail”)
I asked Molly what her favorite Shakespeare play was. She said, “As You Like It, Molly”! (plays on “as you like it”)
Molly’s always the life of the party… even when she’s the designated driver. She’s the ultimate party Molly. (plays on “party animal”)
My dog Molly is learning to code. She’s really good at fetching byte-sized information. (plays on “bite-sized”)
My doctor friend Molly just got back from a conference in the Alps. She’s such a medi-cal climber! (plays on “medical” and “mountain climber”)
Tried to make small talk with Molly at the gym, but she wasn’t having it. Guess you could say she ghosted, Molly. (plays on “ghosting” someone)
Molly started a band called “The Periodic Tables.” They’re always looking for an element of surprise. (plays on chemical elements)
Molly said she wanted a career where she could work from anywhere in the world. I told her, “The world’s your oyster, Molly!” (plays on “the world is your oyster”)
Molly tried to make ramen in the coffee machine… let’s just say it was not very souper, Molly. (plays on “not very super”)
What do you call a motivational speaker who’s also a baker? A real inspiration, Molly! (plays on “inspiration, honey!”)
That’s All, Folks! Molly Outta Here!
Well, there you have it, folks! Enough Molly jokes to turn your chuckle into a full-blown guffaw. If you’re still craving more pun-derful humor, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Head over to our website for a treasure trove of jokes that’ll tickle your funny bone ’til it mollifies!
