145+ Grape Puns & Jokes: You’ve Heard of Wine Not? 🍇😂

Get ready to laugh your🍇 off because you’ve stumbled upon the best list of grape puns and jokes this side of the vineyard! 😂 This post is bursting with juicy humor, packed with clever puns, and overflowing with funny jokes about grapes – perfect for kids and adults alike. So grab a bowl of this positively punny goodness (and maybe some real grapes too 😉) and get ready for a grape time!

Top ‘Grape Jokes’ – Best Picks

  1. Why did the grape get lost in the supermarket? It couldn’t find its raisin for being there!
  2. What’s a grape’s least favorite music genre? Anything with too much whine!
  3. Did you hear about the grape who became a detective? He was always trying to unravel mysteries!
  4. Why was the grape embarrassed at the fruit stand? Because he knew everyone was looking at his juicier assets!
  5. How do grapes travel? They take the wine and dine train!
  6. What did the grape say to the raisin? “Hey! You look familiar, haven’t we met before?”
  7. I tried to make grape juice in the microwave… Turns out, it was a bad vintage.
  8. What do you call a grape that’s been knighted by the queen? Sir Chardonnay!
  9. How do you communicate with a grape? You have to speak their vine language!
  10. I went to a grape farm last weekend… It was vine-tastic!
  11. Why are grapes so bad at hide-and-seek? They always get caught in the bunch!
  12. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
  13. What’s a grape’s favorite type of candy? Anything sour!
  14. What does a grape use to surf the internet? A wine-fi connection!
  15. Why did the grape get fired from his job at the bank? He kept raisin the interest rates!
  16. You know, I used to hate grapes… But then it just hit me: let it be.
  17. My friend said he was starting a grape farm, but I was skeptical… I told him, “I need to see it to be-leaf it!”
  18. What’s a grape’s favorite book? The Grapes of Wrath!
Ultimate list and collection of Best Grape Jokes and Puns, One-liners, Dad Jokes, Funny Quotes, and Captions - Discover engaging and humorous content at PunnyHub.com

Clever ‘Grape Puns’ – Best Picks

  1. I tried to make grape juice, but I couldn’t quite concourd it. (Conquer/Concord grape)
  2. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little whine.
  3. Did you hear about the grape that went to art school? It drew a still vine. (Still life)
  4. What does a grape use to surf the internet? A dial-up vine.
  5. Don’t tell secrets in a vineyard, the walls have ears of corn… and the grapes have eyes.
  6. I was going to make a salad with grapes, but it just felt too grape expectations.
  7. Never underestimate a grape, it’s always up to wine-ing ways. (Winning/wining)
  8. You know what my favorite music genre is? Anything grape-hop. (Hip-hop)
  9. What’s a grape’s favorite dance move? The grapevine.
  10. Those grapes are up to something, I can feel it in my vine-t. (Gut/vint)
  11. Life is like a box of grapes, you never know what you’re gonna get… but it’s probably delicious.
  12. That grape is so dramatic, it’s always making a big scene… or should I say, a big vineyard scene?
  13. I’m starting a band called “The Grapes of Wrath.” We’re a little sour.
  14. What do you call a grumpy green grape? A sour puss… or should we say, a sour pus-grape?!
  15. I was going to write a book about grapes, but I couldn’t think of a good plot… or should I say, a good vine-yard?
  16. What’s purple and goes “Thump, thump, thump”? A grape rolling down a hill.

Funny ‘Grape One-Liner Jokes’ – Short & Funny Grape Jokes

  1. I tried to make wine from my neighbor’s grapes, but it turned out he’s got a real sour disposition.
  2. Breaking news: Local winemaker arrested, police say he’s the ringleader of a grape conspiracy.
  3. Did you hear about the grape that went to drama school? It really blossomed on stage.
  4. I’m feeling grapeful for automatic grape peelers, they save me a bunch of time.
  5. My grandpa used to say, “Life is like a box of grapes, you never know what you’re gonna get.” I think he just really liked grapes.
  6. Just saw a sign that said “Caution: Falling Grapes.” Seems like a bunch of baloney to me.
  7. Dating a raisin is tough, they’ve got so much baggage. You could say they’re stuck in the grape past.
  8. I wanted to write a song about grapes, but I couldn’t find the right chardonnay.
  9. What does a grape say when it gets stepped on? Nothing, it just lets out a little whine.
  10. Don’t be such a sour grape, things could be worse! You could be a raisin.
  11. My dream job? Wine taster. It’s just my grape-itude for good drinks.
  12. I’m starting a grape-themed band called “The Wine-Nots.” We’re gonna be huge!
  13. My kid refused to eat his grapes. What a missed jam session, if you ask me.
  14. You know what they say: “When life gives you grapes, make grape soda!” Or, you know, wine.
  15. I saw a grape wearing a helmet and knee pads earlier. He looked really prepared for a roll down a hill.
  16. Some people collect stamps, I collect grape soda bottles. It’s a pretty niche hobby.

Grape QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Grape

  1. Q: What’s a grape’s favorite type of music? A: Anything with a good beat…and vine! 🎶
  2. Q: Why did the grape get lost in the supermarket? A: It couldn’t find its way back to the bunch! 🛒
  3. Q: What do you call a grape that’s been knighted by the Queen? A: Sir-acha! 👑🌶️
  4. Q: Why did the grape get sent to the principal’s office? A: For starting a food fight…it was a real grape-vine brawl! 🍇💥
  5. Q: How does a grape answer the phone? A: Yellow? It’s grape! 📞
  6. Q: What’s a grape’s favorite dance move? A: The tango! They’re always up for a little grape-tivity! 💃🍇
  7. Q: What do you get if you cross a grape with a dog? A: A berry, berry good boy! 🐶🍇
  8. Q: Why are grapes such bad liars? A: Because they always let the cat out of the bag…of grapes! 🤫😸🍇
  9. Q: What do you call a grape that loves to sing in the shower? A: A shower grape-er! 🎤🚿🍇
  10. Q: How do grapes make important decisions? A: They have a com-pote to discuss things! 🤝🍇
  11. Q: What’s a grape’s favorite game show? A: Price is Grape! 💰🍇
  12. Q: Why did the grape get a job at the library? A: It heard they had a grape-vine collection of books! 📚🍇
  13. Q: What do you call a group of grapes that are always getting into trouble? A: A bunch of bad seeds! 😈🍇
  14. Q: How do grapes apologize after an argument? A: They say, “I guess I was wine-ing too much!” 🍷😔🍇
  15. Q: What do you call a grape that’s really good at math? A: A calcul-grape! 🧮🍇
  16. Q: What’s a grape’s favorite board game? A: Sorry! They always land on the “sour grapes” space! 🍇🎲
  17. Q: What did the grape say to the apple when it fell out of the tree? A: “Looks like you’ve got a core issue there, buddy!” 🍎🍇
  18. Q: Why don’t grapes like to share their toys? A: They’re always a little grape-ty! 🍇🧸
  19. Q: What’s a grape’s favorite type of car? A: A grape-mobile! Beeeep Beeep! 🚗🍇

Dad Jokes About Grape: Pun-Filled Quips

  1. I just saw a truckload of grapes in a ditch! It was grape-ful nobody was hurt.
  2. My wife told me to take the grapes out of the freezer. I said, “But honey, they’re already frozen grapes!”
  3. What do you call a grape that’s a sore loser? A sour grape!
  4. What’s purple and flies through the air? A grape-ellant!
  5. I tried to make grape juice in the microwave… It turned into wine! I guess I grape-set my expectations.
  6. What does a grape say when it gets stepped on? Nothing, it just lets out a little whine!
  7. I used to work at a grape juice factory, but I got canned… I couldn’t con-centrate!
  8. I went to a grape-themed art exhibition. Turns out it was just a bunch of still wines.
  9. If you step on a grape, does it become wine? No, but it’ll definitely leave a stain!
  10. Why did the grape get lost in the supermarket? He couldn’t find his raisin d’être!
  11. My son asked me, “Dad, are grapes made of rubber?” I said, “No, son. That’s pre-posterous!”
  12. I tried to make grape jam last night, but I didn’t strain the seeds. Now it’s just a bunch of grape jelly-conspirators.
  13. What did the daddy grape say to the baby grape who was afraid of the dark? “Don’t worry, there’s nothing to wine about.”
  14. If two grapes get married, what music do they play at the reception? Anything but heavy metal – they like their music grape and mellow!
  15. I tried to write a song about grapes, but I couldn’t get past the first measure. Guess I hit a sour note.
  16. What did the police say to the stolen grapes? “We’ve got you surrounded, it’s time to raisin your hands!”
  17. A grape walks into a doctor’s office and says, “Doc, I think I’m dying! I’ve got this terrible rash!” The doctor looks him over and says, “Don’t worry, it’s only a wine-flection.”
  18. Why don’t they play poker in the vineyard? Because the stakes are too high!

Grape Jokes and Puns for Kids

  1. What’s a grape’s favorite type of music? Anything berry good!
  2. What did the baby grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
  3. Why didn’t the grape do well in school? Because it kept getting stuck in raisin its hand!
  4. What do you call a grumpy grape? A sour puss!
  5. How do grapes travel on water? They sail on wine-derful grape ships!
  6. Why did the grape get lost in the forest? It followed a winding path!
  7. Knock knock! Who’s there? Grape. Grape who? Grape to see you!
  8. Why are grapes so good at basketball? They’re always dribbling!
  9. What did the mama grape say to her kids? “Behave or you’ll turn into raisins!”
  10. Why don’t grapes tell secrets? Because they always wined up getting out!
  11. What do you get if you cross a grape and a lion? I don’t know, but I wouldn’t want to wine about it!
  12. What’s purple and likes to sing in the shower? A grape-a-oke star!
  13. Why did the grape cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken!
  14. What did the ocean say to the grape? Nothing, it just waved!
  15. What do you call a grape that’s really good at karate? A black belt!
  16. How do you make a grape juice box? Give it lots of grape expectations!
  17. What did the grape say to the bully? “Leave me alone!”
  18. Why did the grapes go to the party? To have a bunch of fun!
  19. What’s a grape’s favorite dance? The grape-vine!

Grape Jokes and Puns for Adults

  1. Why did the grape get fired from the bank? Because he kept raisin’ the interest rates.
  2. A grape walks into a bar looking for a fight. What does he say? “I heard you were talkin’ ’bout my mama…and my Pinot Noir!”
  3. You know, I tried to make wine out of raisins once… It turned out to be a terrible decision on so many levels.
  4. I met a guy at a winery who swore he was descended from grapes. I told him, “Get a gripe!”
  5. My therapist told me to imagine my problems as grapes. I said, “Okay, but what good will that do?” He said, “Then you stomp all over them!” I told him, “Sounds like my dating life.”
  6. Dating apps are like vineyards… So many options, but you’re probably going to end up with something sour.
  7. Why don’t grapes ever win arguments? They’re always getting crushed under pressure.
  8. Heard about the grape that went to art school? He’s a real fine artist.
  9. Why did the grape break up with the raisin? He thought she was too dried up and wrinkled.
  10. I saw a sign at a juice bar that said, “Grape Expectations.” I guess that’s what happens when you set the bar too high.
  11. My therapist told me to embrace my anger. So I gave it a warm hug and a glass of Pinot Noir.
  12. A grape walks into a doctor’s office and says, “Doc, I think I’m dying! I keep seeing spots!” The doctor says, “Well, first off, quit looking in the mirror!”
  13. Why was the grape so embarrassed at the party? He realized he’d shown up in the same outfit as the punch bowl.
  14. You know you’ve had too much wine when… You start telling everyone you’re a “wine connoisseur,” but you’re really just a “whino” with a thesaurus.
  15. I tried to start a grape smuggling ring… But it was hard to keep it under wraps.
  16. What’s a grape’s favorite genre of music? Anything with a good vinetage.
  17. Why are grapes so bad at keeping secrets? They have a tendency to spill the beans.
  18. I told my date I make wine as a hobby. She said, “Oh, how grape!” I thought it was cheesy too.
  19. Life is like a box of grapes: You never know what you’re gonna get…except for the occasional seed of disappointment.

Grape Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media

  1. Just saw a bunch of grapes on a treadmill… They were raisin’ the bar. 🍇🏃‍♂️
  2. My friend said I couldn’t come up with a grape pun. I told him, “Give me a break, I’ve got tons!” 🍇🤣
  3. What did the green grape say to the purple grape? “Breathe, man! Breathe!” 🍇😮‍💨
  4. I tried to make wine with grapes I found under my couch… Turns out it was just a vintage dust bunny. 🍇🍷🐰
  5. Why did the grape get lost in the supermarket? He took a juice-turn! 🍇🛒
  6. Did you hear about the raisin who went back to school? He wanted to be a grape again! 🍇🎓
  7. My therapist told me to imagine my problems are like grapes… I said, “Okay, so I make wine?” 🍇🍷😌
  8. I used to be addicted to grapes, but I’m raisin’ awareness now. 🍇✊
  9. What’s a grape’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat! 🍇🎶
  10. Why are grapes so good at basketball? They’re always dribbling! 🍇🏀
  11. Never tell a secret in a vineyard… Those grapes have ears everywhere! 🍇🤫
  12. What’s a grape’s favorite dance move? The Grapevine, obviously. 🍇💃🕺
  13. My friend tried to tell me raisin bread is better toasted… I said, “Don’t get me started, it’s a sore subject.” 🍇🍞🔥
  14. Why did the grape get a job at the bank? He was good with his money! 🍇💰
  15. If you’re ever feeling down, just remember… even the sourest grape can become fine wine. 🍇🍷✨
  16. You can tell a lot about a person by their favorite type of grape… It’s true. I read it on the grapevine. 🍇🤭
  17. I’m writing a book about grapes, but I’m having trouble with the ending… I guess you could say it’s… to be continued. 🍇✍️
  18. What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little whine! 🍇🦶🍷

That’s All, Folks! Wine Not Share These Grape Jokes? 🍇😂

We hope these grape puns and jokes have tickled your funny bone! If you’re still feeling thirsty for more laughs, don’t just sit there like a bunch of sour grapes – explore the rest of our punny website! We’ve got a whole vineyard of jokes waiting to be harvested. 🍇😂

Rabia Noreen & Team

Rabia Noreen: The Punnovator

Hi, I'm Rabia, the lead punster behind PunnyHub.com, alongside my incredible team. With a background in Comparative Literature, I specialize in turning phrases and crafting chuckles. My team and I are committed to delivering humor that not only entertains but enlightens. Every post we share is designed to sprinkle your day with laughter and a dash of wit. Find your Best Puns & Jokes.

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