101+ Hamilton Puns & Jokes: You’ll Be ‘Satisfied’
Get ready to laugh your breeches off, because this is the best list of Hamilton jokes and puns this side of the Revolutionary War! 😂 We’ve got humor for kids and adults, with enough clever wordplay to satisfy even the pickiest pun enthusiast. 😜 Get ready for a whirlwind of wit – these Hamilton jokes are gonna blow you away! 🌬️💣
Top Hamilton Jokes – Best Picks
I tried to explain to my friend why Hamilton was so popular, but I just couldn’t say… My Shot.
What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite type of cookie? A Macaron-i and cheese cookie!
Heard about the Hamilton-themed escape room? It’s really hard to get out of… “The Room Where It Happens.”
I wrote a rap song about how much I owe on student loans. Turns out, I’m “Helpless” and in debt.
What’s General Howe’s least favorite song from Hamilton? “Yorktown (The World Turned Upside Down).”
Alexander Hamilton’s autobiography was originally titled… “My Shot: An American Hustle.”
I tried to make a Hamilton-themed cocktail, but it was a complete… Burr-asterpiece! (At least I tried, right?)
What did Eliza Hamilton say when Alexander proposed? “Wait for it…” (Just kidding, she was probably head over heels!)
Who’s the most popular hairdresser in the American Revolution? Marquis de Hair-lafayette! He gives a mean powdered wig styling.
What would you call a Hamilton and Hercules Mulligan buddy comedy? “Guns and Ships: The Hilarious Revolutionary Adventures!”
You could say Alexander Hamilton was ahead of his time… after all, he was rapping before it was cool!
Clever Hamilton Puns – Best Picks
“I’m convinced Lin-Manuel Miranda wrote Hamilton just so he could say ‘Hamil-Turn’ and make history punnier.”
“What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite cereal? Cheerio-graphy!”
My friend told me Hamilton was overrated. I said, “Don’t be so Burr-eaucratic about it!”
“I started listening to the Hamilton soundtrack backwards… Turns out, it’s about a rapper who becomes a farmer!”
“My history professor keeps calling Alexander Hamilton ‘Hammy Down.’ Kind of insulting, but also…amazing?”
That awkward moment when you’re trying to write a love song, but all you can think about is Hamilton. Talk about a lyrical dilemma!
I tried explaining the plot of Hamilton to my dog. He just stared at me like I was barking mad.
“What do you call a Hamilton parody performed by cats? The Purr-suasion of a musical.”
“I tried to make a Hamilton-themed pizza, but I accidentally burned the crust. Guess you could say it was… under King George’s rule.”
You know you’ve listened to Hamilton too much when… your dog starts howling along to “Yorktown.”
“Someone keeps leaving Hamilton lyrics on my desk at work. I need to find out who it is… they’re my shot!”
Funny Hamilton One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Hamilton Jokes
I told my friend everything about “Hamilton”… Turns out, he’s already Satisfied.
What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite type of cookie? Burr-bon Pecan.
My friend named his dog after Alexander Hamilton… He’s a real Federalist pup.
I tried to get my dog to audition for “Hamilton”… He threw away his shot – literally.
What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite cereal? General Mills.
I saw a guy dressed as Alexander Hamilton walking a piglet on a leash… I guess he really took the whole “work!” thing seriously.
I’m so obsessed with “Hamilton”, I even named my plants after the characters… Unfortunately, Angelica keeps dying on me.
I thought about writing a sequel to “Hamilton”… but I’m afraid it would just be Burr-ing with mediocrity.
My history teacher keeps referencing “Hamilton”… I guess you could say he’s quite the history buff-ilton.
I went to a “Hamilton” themed party last night… It was revolutionary.
I’m writing a love letter, but I can’t decide who to write about: Alexander Hamilton or Eliza Schuyler… I’m so torn between two lovers.
I’m opening a seafood restaurant inspired by “Hamilton.” It’ll be called “Aaron Burr, Sir… Loved Salmon.”
I’m learning the “Hamilton” soundtrack backwards… just in case I ever need to sing it in an alternate universe.
My friend said he didn’t like “Hamilton”… I was like, “You wanna have a rap battle about it?”
Hamilton QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Hamilton
Q: Why did Alexander Hamilton always carry a spare quill? A: In case he needed to write a Hamil-ton of letters! 🪶
Q: What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite type of cookie? A: A Macaron-yon! 🍪
Q: What’s the only cure for a bad case of “Hamilton” withdrawal? A: Seeing it “Hamil-ten” more times, obviously! 😉
Q: Why didn’t King George III like Hamilton? A: He found him too revolutionary and a bit of a rebel rouser! 👑
Q: What did Eliza Schuyler say when Alexander proposed? A: “I’m not throwing away my shot… at love!” ❤️
Q: Why was Angelica Schuyler such a good artist? A: She had a knack for capturing the “Hamil-tones”! 🎨
Q: What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite Broadway show (besides his own)? A: “Spamilton,” of course! 😂
Q: What did George Washington say to Hamilton after a long day of writing? A: “That’s enough, son. You’ve written a “Hamil-ton” today!” ✍️
Q: Why did Hamilton cross the Delaware River? A: To get to the other side… and write another fiery pamphlet! ❄️
Q: What’s Aaron Burr’s favorite board game? A: Anything BUT “Hamil-tonopoly”! 🎲
Q: What do you call a Hamilton fan who can rap every single line? A: A “Hamil-pro”! 😎
Q: What’s the most popular drink at a “Hamilton” after-party? A: “The Hamil-tini” – shaken, not stirred! 🍸
Q: How do you know you’ve seen “Hamilton” too many times? A: You start speaking in iambic pentameter! 🎤
Dad Jokes About Hamilton: Pun-Filled Quips
I wanted to get tickets for “Hamilton” for your birthday… but they were too expensiv-ilton!
Did you hear about the “Hamilton” rap battle in the bakery? It was an all-out dough-nut duel!
Why was Alexander Hamilton so good at writing essays in school? He was always writ-ten-tive in class!
What did Alexander Hamilton say when he walked into the bank? “I’m here to make a deposito-n.”
The other Founding Fathers were jealous of Hamilton’s work ethic. They wished they could be as hamilt-on as he was.
Why was Hamilton such a good singer? He practiced his scales every day on his Hamilt-one system!
King George was jealous of all the attention Hamilton got. He wanted to be the center of the Hamilt-universe!
You think you know everything about “Hamilton”? Don’t test me, I’m practically a Hamil-tonian!
I got a new job writing trivia questions about “Hamilton”. It’s my new Hamil-tenure!
I tripped over a $10 bill today. Talk about a Hamil-ton-fall!
I tried to make a “Hamilton” themed dinner, but I burned the macaroni and cheese. It was a culinary dis-ast-erton.
What do you call a sad Alexander Hamilton? A glum Hamil-ton.
I bought a used car with Alexander Hamilton’s face on it. It was only ten Hamil-tons!
My wife loves “Hamilton”. She blasts it in the car, at home, everywhere! She’s totally Hamil-tone-deaf.
Hamilton Jokes and Puns for Kids
Why did Alexander Hamilton cross the road? To get to the other side…of the revolution!
What did everyone say when they saw little Alexander Hamilton’s handwriting? “Wow, he’s got a way with words!”
Why didn’t King George want to duel Alexander Hamilton? He heard Hamilton was a real shot in the arm for the revolution!
What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite Broadway show (besides his own, of course!)? Anything with Hamil-tons of singing and dancing!
What did Alexander Hamilton say when he saw the $10 bill for the first time? “Hey! That’s my ten-dollar hat!”
Why did Alexander Hamilton love math class? Because he was a Hamil-ten out of ten student!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Hamilton. Hamilton who? Hamilton you coming out to play?
What was Alexander Hamilton’s favorite thing to order at a restaurant? French fries and a Hamil-tonic!
Why was Alexander Hamilton such a good writer? Because he always used his quill-ity materials!
What did they call Alexander Hamilton when he was being silly? A Hamil-goofball!
Where did Alexander Hamilton go on vacation? To Hamil-tonia, of course!
What did Alexander Hamilton sing at his birthday party? “This is the story of my life, and today is my Hamil-birthday!”
Why was Alexander Hamilton such a good leader? Because he was always willing to take the reins…and write about it in the Federalist Papers!
What’s Alexander Hamilton’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat you can Hamil-tap your feet to!
Hamilton Jokes and Puns for Elders
You know, in my day, we had musicals with real singers, not just… whispers “Hamiltonians.”
Back in my day, duels were settled with fists, not… dramatically throws handkerchief “Hamiltons!”
They say “Hamilton” is about the founding fathers. More like the “founding bothers” am I right? All that drama! clutches pearls
I told my grandkids I was going to see “Hamilton.” They said, “Grandpa, that’s so 18th century!”
My hip replacement surgery cost a “Hamilton,” and that’s one founding father I wouldn’t mind taking back.
I’m not sure what all the fuss is about this Alexander fellow. In my day, we had real heroes like… trails off, thoughtfully scratching chin
You know you’re old when the most rebellious thing you’ve done all week is sing along to the “Hamilton” soundtrack.
My hearing aid works great, but I still can’t understand a word they’re saying in “Hamilton.” All that rapping!
I saw “Hamilton” and now I’m inspired to write my own hip-hopera about my life. I call it “Gertrude: Queen of the Early Bird Special”.
“Immigrants, we get the job done.” Except when it comes to understanding all the slang in “Hamilton.” What’s a “burner phone”?
King George in “Hamilton” reminds me of my ex-husband. Always throwing a tantrum and singing about how he’s “not throwing away his shot.”
You think “Hamilton” is long? You should try sitting through my grandson’s violin recital!
Hamilton Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
I’m convinced King George’s favorite dating app was Hamil-Tinder. It’s a shame it didn’t work out – he really got “Burned”. 🔥👑
Tried explaining the plot of Hamilton to my history buff friend. I think I “Yorktown” him out. 🤯📚
Me trying to learn all the lyrics to “Guns and Ships” be like: (•_•) 🎤🐢
Breaking News: Local squirrel claims to have buried 10,000 pages of Hamilton fanfiction. Historians are going nuts. 🐿️✍️
Someone asked me what my favorite song from Hamilton was. I replied, “I am very much ‘Indecisive'”. 🎶🤔
Just saw Hamilton for the 10th time… My bank account is “Satisfied”, but my wallet is not throwing away its “Shot”. 💸😫
My love life is like Hamilton – nonexistent until the last 20 minutes, and even then, it ends in tragedy. 😭💔
Just realized I spend more time thinking about the Reynolds Pamphlet than Alexander Hamilton probably did. 🤫🤭
You could say my obsession with Hamilton is a bit extra. But hey, at least I’m not the one who wrote a whole musical about it. 😌🎤
I’m not saying I relate to Hercules Mulligan, but I also have a knack for gathering gossip and wearing fabulous hats. 💅👒
Me trying to function in everyday life after being emotionally wrecked by Hamilton. (Image of the “And Peggy!” portrait) #Mood
Just found out my history professor hates Hamilton. I guess you could say things are about to get… “revolutionary” in class. 😈🍎
Someone: coughs Me: Did someone say “Helpless”? I can rap that for you. 😉🎶
Me, introducing my friends to Hamilton, knowing they’ll be obsessed too: You’re welcome. 😌🪄
A Hamilfilm a day keeps the doctor away… or at least makes you forget you have an appointment. 🎬🙈
Yorktown? More like Pun-ktown! 🎤 Drop the mic.
And that’s the last word on these Hamilton puns, I’m dropping the mic! But don’t worry, the laughter doesn’t have to stop here. You can be “Satisfied” and explore more hilarious puns and jokes on our website. Go ahead, take your shot!
