135+ Monday Puns & Jokes: A Case of the Mondays
Get ready to laugh away those dreaded Monday blues! 😂 This is where the fun begins! 🎉 We’ve compiled the best list of Monday puns and jokes about Monday that are sure to turn your frown upside down. 😄 Whether you need some humor to survive Monday morning or a dose of positive vibes for Motivational Monday, we’ve got you covered. 😉 This funny collection has something for everyone, even jokes about Monday for kids! Get ready for some clever wordplay and side-splitting punchlines! 🤪
Top ‘Monday Jokes’ – Best Picks
- Why did the calendar keep slapping itself? Because it was Monday through Friday!
- My boss asked me, “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?” I said, “Sir, this is a Monday, maybe try a Zoom call?”
- How does a computer programmer celebrate Monday? They start their week on a Tuesday!
- I hate it when people say, “Cheer up, it’s almost Friday!” First of all, it’s Monday. Second of all, it’s Monday.
- I used to hate Mondays. Now I go to the gym, grab a coffee, and come home to my loving family. My therapist says I’m making progress.
- Mondays are like sequels to movies nobody wanted. They just keep coming back, even though we all know they won’t be good.
- What did the Monday say to the coffee? “Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.”
- My doctor gave me some bad news today. He said I’m allergic to work. I told him, “Especially on Mondays!”
- I don’t have a problem with Mondays. It’s the 24 hours attached to them that I can’t stand.
- What’s the difference between a coffee and a Monday? I actually look forward to my coffee.
- Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life. Unless you’re a dog, then every day is tail-wagging good.
- They say “dress for the job you want.” So, if I show up to work in pajamas on Monday, does that mean I want to be asleep?
- I put my phone on airplane mode this morning, but it still doesn’t seem to be taking me away from Monday. What gives?
- Why are Mondays always so tired? They’ve just had a weekend-long party!
- What’s the only thing worse than a case of the Mondays? Realizing it’s Tuesday and you were too delirious to enjoy the weekend.
- Monday motivation: I’m not lazy, I’m just highly motivated to do absolutely nothing.
- Employer: “Why do you deserve a raise?” Me: Gestures broadly to the calendar
- Mondays are like alarm clocks. They’re loud, annoying, and constantly reminding you that you have responsibilities.
Clever ‘Monday Puns’ – Best Picks
- Feeling very “Mon-deh” today. Like someone replaced my coffee with decaf tears.
- Mondays are like a blank canvas. Unfortunately, I’m feeling more like a crumpled paper bag.
- This Monday is so dreadful, even my coffee needs a motivational speech.
- I tried to explain to my boss that I’m suffering from a severe case of the Mondays… turns out it’s not a valid excuse for missing work.
- My brain on Monday morning is like a browser with 20 tabs open, three of which are frozen, and I have no idea where the music is coming from.
- I don’t need a therapist, I just need it to be Friday. Oh, and maybe a nap. And a million dollars. Okay, maybe I do need a therapist.
- Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
- The only thing I “Mon-do” better on a Monday is procrastinate.
- My goal this Monday is to move… preferably from my bed to the couch.
- “Challenge accepted,” I whispered to Monday morning. As I promptly went back to sleep.
- Mondays are like a math problem. Add coffee, subtract sleep, multiply by stress, and divide by zero motivation.
- What’s the difference between a zombie and a person on a Monday morning? One craves brains, the other just wants coffee.
- Just found out that “I can’t adult today” isn’t a valid reason to call out of work on a Monday. Disappointed, but not surprised.
- Mondays should come with a warning label: “May cause extreme drowsiness, excessive caffeine consumption, and a strong desire to disappear.”
- If each day is a gift, then on Mondays I’d like to speak to the manager about this faulty present.
- Don’t worry, be happy! …said no one ever on a Monday morning.
- My to-do list for today? Survive Monday.
- Monday: The day I contemplate becoming a hermit who lives in the woods and only speaks to squirrels.
- This Monday has me feeling like I need to win the lottery… or at least find twenty dollars in my pocket.
Funny ‘Monday One-Liner Jokes’ – Short & Funny Monday Jokes
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes… so I’m calling in sick on Monday.
- I tried to explain to my boss that I have a chronic case of the Mondays, but he just gave me the Tuesday look.
- Mondays are like alarm clocks, if we didn’t need them, they wouldn’t exist.
- What’s the difference between a coffee and Monday? I don’t remember the last time I hugged a coffee and yelled, “Get out of my life!”
- My goal this week is to be as productive as a Monday meme on a Tuesday morning.
- People who say “It’s Monday, but it’s a new week!” clearly haven’t checked their emails yet.
- Monday is a great day to pretend you know what you’re doing at work.
- I put the “pro” in procrastination every Monday morning.
- My brain on Monday is like a web browser with 20 tabs open, 3 of them frozen, and I have no idea where the music is coming from.
- Monday: The day I start planning my weekend escape.
- I don’t have a case of the Mondays, Mondays have a case of me.
- My relationship with Monday is like that of oil and water. They just don’t mix.
- Weekend: Hold my coffee, Monday’s coming.
- You know it’s Monday when even your coffee needs a coffee.
- Dear Monday, I think it’s time we see other people.
- I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but I’d definitely file a restraining order against them if I could.
- Found a dollar on the ground this morning. Still not enough to make me excited about Monday.
- I love the smell of fresh starts… said no one ever on a Monday.
- Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday so close to Monday? It’s a conspiracy, I tell you!
Monday QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Monday
- Q: What do you call a Monday that’s gone really well? A: A myth!
- Q: Why did the calendar page fall in love with Monday? A: It could never turn the page fast enough!
- Q: What’s the only thing worse than a Monday morning? A: Realizing it’s actually Tuesday, and you’ve been off by a day!
- Q: Why are Mondays like traffic lights? A: They always seem red when you’re already running late!
- Q: Why are Mondays so good at hide and seek? A: Because nobody wants to find them!
- Q: What did the calendar say to Monday? A: “Ugh, you again? Please tell me it’s a leap year and you have a twin.”
- Q: What motivational speech do Mondays need? A: None, they just need to “latte” be!
- Q: How do trees get on the internet on Monday mornings? A: They log in!
- Q: Why was Monday feeling insecure? A: It had a serious case of the Sunday scaries!
- Q: How do we know Mondays and printers are related? A: They’re both notorious for causing unexpected problems!
- Q: If Monday had a superpower, what would it be? A: The ability to multiply, creating even more Mondays!
- Q: Why was Monday feeling under the weather? A: It had a bad case of the “Mondays”!
- Q: Why don’t scientists trust atoms? A: Because they make up everything, especially excuses for not working on Mondays!
- Q: Why did the employee bring a ladder to work on Monday? A: They heard it was a “climbing the corporate ladder” kind of day!
- Q: What did the coffee say to Monday? A: “Don’t worry, I got you covered… or should I say, brewed.”
- Q: How do you make a Monday more bearable? A: Add a “Tues” to it!
Dad Jokes About Monday: Pun-Filled Quips
- I wanted to buy a car named Monday… but they only had one on Mon-Daytona.
- This Monday is off to a great start! Well, at least it’s not Moan-day.
- What did the calendar say to Monday? “Just another week, hang in there!”
- I almost didn’t recognize my coworker this morning… It’s like he transformed over the week-end.
- Monday morning commute is like a game of chess… except the pawns are cars, and everyone’s trying to be the king.
- I used to hate Mondays… then I retired. Now I live for them! More time with my favorite people (you guessed it, me!).
- Don’t worry, this Monday can’t last forever… it’s only 24 hours long.
- I tried to explain to my boss that I’m more productive on Tuesdays… he didn’t buy it. Guess I’ll just Mon-delay the work.
- My wife asked me what my plans were for Monday morning… I told her, “Same as yours, dear. Pretend to be enthusiastic.”
- My doctor told me to avoid anything stressful… so I’m skipping work on Monday.
- I don’t understand why everyone complains about Mondays… more pancakes for me!
- Why are Mondays so tired? They had to work all week-end!
- My motivation on Monday mornings is like a unicorn… mythical.
- I used to hate shaving on Mondays, but then it grew on me.
- What’s the difference between a coffee and a Monday? I don’t need my coffee to tell me to go away.
- I put my phone on airplane mode this Monday morning… now it can finally experience a weekend getaway.
- I asked my son what he learned at school about Monday… he said, “That it’s a holiday for teachers!”
- You know what they say… “Mondays are for fresh starts!” Or, you know, just hitting the snooze button a few times.
Monday Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the student eat his homework on Monday? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
- What did the Monday say to the Friday? “Weekend’s over! Time to get back to school!”
- What’s a spider’s favorite day of the week? Fly-day… but they like to catch up on their webs on Monday!
- Why is Monday like a letter? Because it’s always followed by Tues-day!
- What’s a teacher’s favorite drink on Monday morning? Tea-cher’s tea!
- How do you know Monday is tired? It’s always yawning! 😴
- Why do fish hate Mondays? Because they have to go back to school in their school of fish!
- What does a Monday clock say to a Friday clock? “See you next week!”
- What’s a cat’s favorite day of the week? Caturday… but Mondays are a cat-astrophy!
- Why do Mondays always come back so quickly? They must be in a hurry to see their friend, Tuesday!
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Monday. Monday who? Monday happy to see you again!
- Why did the calendar page refuse to turn to Monday? It was feeling week!
- What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra who got a sunburn on Monday!
- What did the pencil say to the paper on Monday morning? “Looks like we’ve got a lot of work to do this week!”
- Why did the computer get sent to its room on Monday? It had too much screen time over the weekend!
- What did the Monday say to the grumpy kid? “Cheer up! It’s a brand new week to have some fun!”
- How do bees get to school on Monday morning? They take the school buzz! 🐝
- What do you call a Monday that’s full of surprises? A Fun-day!
- Why are Mondays like magnets? They always attract complaints!
- Remember kids, Mondays aren’t so bad! They’re just a reminder that a whole new week of adventures is about to begin! 😊
Monday Jokes and Puns for Adults
- I tried to explain to my coffee cup that it’s Monday. It went right over the rim. 😔☕️
- Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday is so close to Monday? It’s temporal discrimination, I tell ya! ⏰🤯
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. Guess I’ll just go ahead and hug this Monday, then. 😩🫂
- I put my phone in airplane mode, but it still didn’t take me away from Monday. The deception runs deep! ✈️📱
- My bank account is always so “Monday-vated” to get back to work after the weekend. 💸😭
- Some people chase their dreams. On Mondays, I just try to outrun the existential dread. 🏃💨😱
- Monday is like that ex you blocked on social media but still dream about occasionally. Mostly nightmares, though. 👻😴
- If each day is a gift, can I return Monday for store credit? Maybe exchange it for a Friday? 🎁🔄
- Mondays are like a game of chess. I feel like I’m constantly one move away from getting checkmated by responsibilities. ♟️😩
- “Adulting” is basically just trying to figure out how to make it to the next Friday without losing your sanity. Especially on Mondays. 🧠🤯
- I tried to spice up my Monday by wearing mismatched socks. It didn’t help, but at least my ankles are confused. 🧦🤔
- I put on my “happy face” for work today. It’s amazing what a little coffee and a whole lot of concealer can do. ☕💄
- My boss asked me for a status update on that project. I told him it’s currently experiencing a severe case of the Mondays. 💻😴
- Mondays should come with a warning label: “May cause feelings of overwhelming despair and a sudden urge to become a goat herder in the Andes.” 🐐⛰️
- I don’t need an alarm clock on Monday mornings. My crushing sense of responsibility wakes me up just fine. ⏰💔
- My horoscope said today would be filled with surprises. Little did I know, “surprise” was just a synonym for “Monday.” 🔮🙄
- The only good thing about Monday is knowing it’s one day closer to Friday. Unless it’s a Monday holiday, then it’s basically a crime against humanity. 🗓️😡
- I’m starting a petition to rename Monday to “Respawn Day.” Who’s with me? 🎮🙋♀️🙋♂️
Monday Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media
- “I’m not saying it was a rough Monday, but my coffee pot filed a restraining order.” ☕️🚫
- What’s the difference between a zombie and Monday? One wants brains, the other slowly drains them. 🧟♂️🧠➡️😴
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. I guess I’ll give Monday a big hug. 😬🫂 😩
- Mondays are like sequels. They rarely live up to the hype of the weekend. 🎬🍿😔
- Me trying to be productive on Monday morning. (Insert GIF of a sloth trying to move at normal speed) 🦥💨
- Mondays should come with a “skip intro” button. 😩 #GetMeToFriday ⏭️
- I put my phone on airplane mode this morning… turns out it doesn’t fly any faster to Friday. ✈️🚫⚡️
- Does anyone else pronounce “Monday” like “Ugh-Nonsense-Day”? Asking for a friend. 🤔🤫
- Found my spirit animal. It’s a cat sleeping in a sunbeam on a Monday morning. 🐈☀️😴 #Goals
- “Motivational Monday” is starting to sound like an oxymoron. Like “jumbo shrimp” or “peaceful war.” 🤔🦐💣
- My bank account after the weekend vs. my bank account on Monday morning. (Insert image of a full swimming pool vs. an empty kiddie pool) 🏊♀️➡️👶
- The only thing I get “done” on Mondays is tired. 😩😴 #StoryOfMyLife
- I’m convinced Monday is just the universe’s way of testing our commitment to our jobs. 🤔🌎💼
- Weekend me wouldn’t recognize weekday me. We have very different coffee orders. 😎☕️➡️😨☕️☕️☕️
- “Smile! It’s Monday!” said no one ever. 😐 #JustBeingHonest
- My brain on Monday trying to remember what I even do for a living. (Insert GIF of a hamster running frantically on a wheel) 🐹🤯
- Spent all weekend planning my productive Monday. Monday had other plans. 📅📝➡️🗑️
- If Mondays were shoes, they’d be Crocs. Controversial and nobody actually likes them. 🤔🐊
- Every Monday, I experience a brief moment of existential dread before I remember I don’t actually have my life together. 😬🧘♀️➡️🤪
- Just remembered it’s only Monday. Send coffee and maybe a therapist. SOS ☕️🧠😭
That’s All Folks! Have a Pun-derful Week Ahead!
We hope these Monday puns and jokes chased away your Monday blues, or at least gave you a chuckle to start the week! Don’t let the Monday mood get you down – keep exploring our website for more punny delights that are sure to turn any frown upside down (even on a Monday!).
