109+ FBI Jokes, Puns: You’re Under A-Rest of Laughter!
🕵️♀️ Ever wonder what happens when the FBI gets a little goofy? Buckle up, because we’re about to dive head-first into a world of puns and jokes about everyone’s favorite federal agency: the FBI! 😂 Get ready for a list of the best (and by best, we mean most hilarious) FBI jokes, clever enough to impress your friends and safe enough for kids. Let’s get this pun-party started! 🎉
Clever Fbi Puns – Top Picks
- Just browsing? FBI, probably.
- Feeling watched? Could be the FBI…bye!
- Heard the FBI opened a bakery? They make undercover donuts.
- FBI surveillance van broke down. Now it’s a stake-out wagon.
- FBI agent walk into a bar. You think you have problems?
- My life is an open book. The FBI seems to agree.
- Failed my FBI exam. Turns out I’m not cut out for the bureau.
- What’s the FBI’s favorite snack? Investi-gatorade.
- The FBI is like a good neighbor. They’re always watching.
- FBI party was a blast! Everyone had a warrant-derful time.
- Don’t worry, it’s just the FBI. Said no one ever…
- FBI motto: We’re on the case, just in case.
- Job interview at the FBI: “We’ve been expecting you.”
- The FBI always gets their man… eventually.
- “Your browser history is troubling.” -Sincerely, the FBI (probably).

Top Fbi Jokes – Best Picks
- Why don’t FBI agents ever play hide and seek? They’re always finding people.
- What’s an FBI agent’s favorite snack? Investi-gateaux.
- An FBI agent walks into a library. He whispers to the librarian, “I’m looking for books about paranoia.” The librarian whispers back, “They’re right behind you!”
- Why did the FBI agent bring a ladder to the surveillance stakeout? They heard the suspect was going to be “climbing the walls.”
- What do you call an FBI agent who’s really bad at their job? Find Bureau Inept.
- How many FBI agents does it take to change a lightbulb? None, that’s classified information!
- Why was the FBI agent suspicious of the restaurant’s special sauce? Because they couldn’t figure out its “secret ingredients.”
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? FBI. FBI who? FBI-ing you from outside your window!
- I used to work for the FBI, but I had to quit. Turns out, I couldn’t handle the bureau-cracy.
- What did the FBI agent say to the suspect who claimed he could escape anything? “We’ll take that as a challenge.”
- Did you hear about the FBI agent who was really into fitness? He always wanted to get to the bottom of things…literally, at the gym.
- I saw two FBI agents chasing a runaway donut. I shouted, “Hey! Is that frosted?” One agent yelled back, “It’s confidential!”
- Why don’t FBI agents ever get lost? Because they always have a warrant to find their way!
- What do you call a group of FBI agents who are really good at singing? The Surveillance Choir.
Funny Fbi One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Fbi Jokes
- The FBI is always watching. Especially when I’m about to eat the last donut.
- I always feel like the FBI is onto me…probably because they’re following me.
- The FBI walked into my house and said, “We’ve got some questions.” I replied, “Shouldn’t you be asking Google?”
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. The FBI then showed up and said, “We’ve been waiting for you.”
- I applied to the FBI, but I guess my skills were a bit…undercover.
- I wonder if the FBI gets tired of everyone saying, “The FBI is watching.” Probably not.
- You know you’ve messed up when the FBI shows up to your Zoom meeting.
- My love life is like the FBI—always watching, never interfering.
- The FBI is hiring motivational speakers. They’re looking for someone to talk some sense into their suspects.
- I’m writing a book about all the times I avoided the FBI. It’s a very short story.
- Apparently, “FBI Open Up!” is not a socially acceptable pick-up line.
- My New Year’s resolution was to be less paranoid about the FBI. It’s not going so well… they’re already onto me.
- I think the FBI is reading my mind…or maybe it’s just this darn tin foil hat slipping.
Fbi QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Fbi
- Q: Why did the FBI agent bring a ladder to work? A: He heard there was a web site they needed to take down!
- Q: How long does it take the FBI to watch your internet history? A: Nanosecond. They’re already here.
- Q: Why don’t FBI agents ever play hide and seek? A: They’re just too good at finding people!
- Q: What do you call an FBI agent who forgets their badge? A: Sir! Please come back! I swear I’m important!
- Q: What’s the difference between the FBI and a toddler? A: The FBI knows when you’re only pretending to sleep.
- Q: What do you call a lazy kangaroo in the FBI? A: Pouch potato!
- Q: What’s an FBI agent’s favorite snack? A: Stake-out fries!
- Q: Why did the FBI agent get lost in the library? A: He was looking for books by Tom Clancy, but they were all checked out!
- Q: Why did the coffee go to the FBI? A: It got mugged!
- Q: What’s an FBI agent’s favorite board game? A: Clue! (Or is it Risk…?)
- Q: Why did the FBI agent get a job at the bank? A: He wanted to be undercover.
- Q: What happens when an FBI agent laughs in their sleep? A: They get a code name!
- Q: What’s an FBI agent’s favorite type of music? A: Anything with a good beat… to tap their foot to while they’re watching you.
- Q: What did the judge say to the noisy FBI agent in court? A: “Order in the court, or I’ll have you surveilled!”
- Q: Why don’t FBI agents ever need to ask for directions? A: They have ways of making you talk!
Dad Jokes About Fbi: Pun-Filled Quips
- I tried to join the FBI, but they said I was too literal. I told them, “Don’t judge a book by its cover.”
- Why did the dad tell his kids about the FBI surveillance van down the street? He liked to keep them informed.
- The FBI wanted me to help them crack a code written in emojis… Apparently, I have a knack for figuiring out this stuff.
- I saw an FBI agent talking to a pastry chef. I think they were cooking up some sort of investigation.
- Why don’t FBI agents ever get lost? Because they always know how to find their bearings.
- The FBI always has a good backup plan. It’s called the “Fed-Ex” delivery.
- An FBI agent walked into a bakery and asked for a dozen donuts. The baker said, “Donuts?! That’s an odd request for the FBI.” The agent replied, “We like to dough things right.”
- You know, they say joining the FBI is like riding a bike… Except the bike is on fire, and the ground is on fire, and everything’s on fire because it’s the FBI!
- Heard the FBI is recruiting at the library? Yeah, seems they’re looking for someone with a lot of intel.
- My son asked why the FBI building has such thick walls… I told him it’s to keep the secrets in-side.
- What’s the most confidential part of the FBI building? The briefing room.
- What does an FBI agent put on their pancakes? Federal syrup!
- What’s the FBI’s favorite board game? Clue …naturally.
- I always wanted to work for the FBI, but I’m afraid of undercover work… I wouldn’t last a day without someone recognizing my fedorable face.
- The FBI had a potluck once, and it was a disaster. Turns out everyone brought their covered dishes.
Fbi Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the FBI agent wear sunglasses to the beach? Because he was on a stake-out! 🕶️
- What do you call a group of FBI agents who love to sing? The Federal Bureau of In-Harmony! 🎤
- What’s an FBI agent’s favorite snack? Investi-gatorade! 🐊
- Why did the FBI agent bring a ladder to work? He heard the stakes were high! 🪜
- What’s an FBI agent’s favorite type of music? Case-tro music! 🎶
- Why don’t FBI agents ever get lost? They always have a lead! 🕵️♀️
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? FBI. FBI who? FBI-lieve you forgot to do your homework! 📚
- What does an FBI agent say when they solve a case? “Case closed!” makes zipping motion across mouth 🤐
- Why did the FBI agent cross the road? To get to the suspect on the other side! 🐔
- What do you call an FBI agent with a green thumb? An evidence planter! 🌱
- My friend said he wanted to work for the FBI. I told him he’d have big shoes to FBI. 👞
- What did the teacher say to the student who wanted to be an FBI agent? “I think you have real a-gent-ial!” 🌟
- Why was the FBI agent bad at hide-and-seek? He was always undercover! 🥸
- What’s an FBI agent’s favorite game show? “America’s Most Wanted”! 📺
- How does an FBI agent say “goodbye”? “See you later, gator!” 👋🐊
Fbi Jokes and Puns for Elders
- Why don’t the FBI bother investigating retirement homes? They know those cases are going cold anyway.
- My grandpa started working for the FBI. Turns out it wasn’t a good fit. He kept trying to solve crimes using Morse code and a magnifying glass.
- I applied to the FBI, but they said I was too “set in my ways.” Honestly, at my age, shouldn’t they value a little experience?
- I tried to explain to my grandkids that FBI stands for Federal Bureau of Investigation. They said, “Yeah, yeah, we know – Facebooking Before Internet.” Kids these days…
- The FBI called me about some suspicious activity on my computer. I told them it was probably just my browser history – sixty years of clicking takes a toll!
- They say an FBI agent always remembers their first surveillance van. Mostly because they parked it in 1972 and haven’t found it since.
- The FBI has been watching my neighbor for months. Turns out, he’s just as boring as the rest of us. Disappointing.
- FBI agent walks into a library. Asks the librarian, “Do you have any books on paranoia?” Librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
- What’s the FBI’s favorite type of music? Wire-tap!
- My doctor recommended I join the FBI for the mental stimulation. Apparently, endlessly trying to remember my passwords counts as brain training.
- The FBI wanted me to join their witness protection program. I said, “Why? What will you do with the rest of me?”
- Why did the FBI agent bring a ladder to the stakeout? They told them to look for the highest suspicious activity!
- I hear the FBI has a new recruitment strategy for seniors. Free denture adhesive with every badge!
- What does the FBI use to secure their cookouts? F.B.Relish!
- The FBI asked if I knew anything about illegal gambling in my retirement community. I told them to let me check my bingo card and I’d get back to them.
Fbi Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- Heard the FBI started a bakery? They’re really good at undercover bread.
- I tried to join the FBI, but apparently I don’t qualify as a “person of intrest.”
- The FBI wanted to know why I was looking up “how to disappear completely.” I told them, “Look, this isn’t what it looks like…”
- My friend said FBI work is easy. I told him, “Don’t be a Fed-up about it.”
- The FBI is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna gitmo.
- The FBI’s new recruitment slogan: “The only thing we surveil more than you is your potential.”
- What do you call an FBI raid on a seafood restaurant? A prawn sting.
- What did the FBI agent say to the suspect’s alibi? “Sorry, your story just doesn’t hold water.”
- I told the FBI agent I thought I was a telepath. He goes, “Sir, please step away from the-”.
- You know you’ve messed up when the FBI agent assigned to your case is a bloodhound.
- The FBI had been tailing a group of bakers for months. Turns out, they were part of a massive bread-laundering scheme.
- I’m writing a book about all the times I almost got caught by the FBI. It’s called “Close Encounters of the Fed Kind.”
- An FBI agent walks into a library looking stressed out. Librarian asks, “Can I help you find something?” Agent whispers, “Quiet, I’m undercover.”
- My grandpa always said he worked for the FBI. Found out later it stood for “Fantastic Baker Incorporated.” Still a legend in my book.