101+ Costco Puns & Jokes: A Wholesale Laugh Riot!

Get ready to laugh your carts off because we’re about to dive into the best Costco jokes and puns this side of the sample station! 😂 This list is packed with clever wordplay and Costco humor that’s sure to tickle your funny bone, whether you’re a seasoned member or just along for the ride. Get ready for some wholesome fun that’s perfect for kids and adults alike – because who doesn’t love a good pun? 😉 So, grab a giant soda and a hot dog (or a churro, we don’t judge 😋) and let’s get this pun party started! 🎉

Clever Costco Puns – Top Picks

1. Costcoholic: I plead guilty.
2. Costco-ming: See you there!
3. Just Costco things. shrugs with 50 lbs of mayo
4. Costco: Making bulk buying beautiful.
5. Costco samples: Dinner is served.
6. Costco: Where savings are supersized.
7. Need it? Costco it.
8. Costco cart: Always full, never enough.
9. Costco: Dangerously delicious deals.
10. Lost in Costco? I can relate.
11. Costco: Enter hungry, leave happy (and broke).
12. Costco: My love language is bulk buys.
13. Got my steps in… at Costco.
14. Costco size problems: I have them all.
15. Costco: Come for the deals, stay for the pizza.

Top Costco Jokes – Best Picks

1. Why did the chicken cross the Costco parking lot? To get to the bulk-sized bag of birdseed on the other side!
2. I went to Costco for a gallon of milk… …I left with a gallon of milk, a kayak, and a year’s supply of mayonnaise. I’m not sure what happened either.
3. You know you’re a Costcoholic when… …you consider building an addition onto your house just to store your Costco purchases.
4. What do you call a group of friends who always shop together at Costco? A “bulk buy” club!
5. My therapist told me to take a break from Costco… …So I’m just going to stand outside and stare at it for a while.
6. I’m on a strict budget, so I’m only going to Costco for the samples. And maybe a 55-gallon drum of Nutella.
7. What do you call a Costco employee who’s always trying to get you to sign up for a membership? A “Costco-ercionist!”
8. Breaking news: Local man buys single banana at Costco, instantly becomes a legend.
9. Date a person who looks at you the same way you look at a free Costco sample. Pure adoration.
10. They say money can’t buy happiness… …But it can buy a Costco membership, which is basically the same thing!
11. Costco is like a relationship: You go in thinking you’ll just look around, and next thing you know, you’re committed for a year.
12. Just tried to return a half-eaten hot dog to Costco. It didn’t go well… Apparently, “I wasn’t hungry enough to finish it” isn’t a valid reason.
13. I always get lost in Costco… I think they build it like a maze on purpose so you have to walk past everything.
14. Costco should give out pedometers at the door… …So you can track just how much exercise you get walking through the entire warehouse.
15. I finally figured out why Costco samples are always so small… They’re just testing your willpower to see if you’re strong enough to resist buying the bulk size!

Funny Costco One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Costco Jokes

1. I saw someone steal a pack of Kirkland batteries at Costco. I guess they thought they could get a-way with it.
2. Costco’s free samples are basically just appetizers for the giant food you buy and eat in the parking lot.
3. Costco is the only place where a “sample” can feed a family of four.
4. You know you’re at Costco when you go in for milk and come out with a kayak and a year’s supply of mayonnaise.
5. I lost my dog in Costco once. It took me an hour and a hot dog combo meal to find him.
6. My therapist suggested I go to Costco to work on my impulse control. Not sure how that’s going…
7. Shopping at Costco is a marathon, not a sprint. Especially if you need a bathroom break.
8. Whenever I’m feeling down, I like to wander the aisles of Costco. It’s like a retail hug.
9. I joined a support group for people addicted to Costco. We meet every Tuesday, in the bulk snacks aisle.
10. I finally broke down and bought a new TV at Costco. I mean, it was 50 inches and practically free…right?
11. Dating tip: Take your date to Costco. If they don’t freak out, you’ve found a keeper.
12. I’m convinced Costco pumps oxygen into the air to make their samples taste better.
13. I think my car is starting to judge me for all the Costco trips we make.
14. Costco is a dangerous place. One minute you’re buying paper towels, the next you’re considering a lifetime supply of gummy bears.
15. I’m pretty sure “Costco” is Latin for “You don’t need that, but you’re gonna buy it anyway.”

Costco QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Costco

1. Q: What do you call a line of dads waiting for the free Costco samples? A: A Griller Queue.
2. Q: How do you know when you’ve spent too long at Costco? A: Your houseplants start sending you “miss you” texts.
3. Q: What’s a pirate’s favorite store? A: Costc-ARRRRRRR-gh!
4. Q: Why did the rotisserie chicken cross the Costco parking lot? A: To prove he wasn’t chicken feed.
5. Q: What do you get when you combine a dinosaur with Costco’s membership fees? A: Tyrannosaurus Regs!
6. Q: Why did the teenager beg their parents for a Costco membership? A: They heard the food court had free refill-ociraptors.
7. Q: What’s a Costco employee’s favorite game show? A: The Price is Right… on Bulk Items!
8. Q: If you’re lost in Costco, what should you do? A: Just follow the trail of giant teddy bears. You’ll find your way back to civilization (or at least the checkout).
9. Q: What do you call it when you find the perfect parking spot at Costco on a Saturday? A: A Costcomiracle!
10. Q: Why did the Costco hot dog start a blog? A: It wanted to share its condi-mints on life.
11. Q: What did the customer say when they found an entire aisle dedicated to mayonnaise? A: Well, that’s jar-some!
12. Q: Why are Costco shoppers such good negotiators? A: They know how to bargain-hunt in bulk.
13. Q: How is shopping at Costco like running a marathon? A: It’s exhilarating, exhausting, and you need a strategy to survive.
14. Q: What do you call a group of friends who shop at Costco together? A: A Bulk-Buying Brigade!
15. Q: What’s the most dangerous part about shopping at Costco? A: Leaving with your wallet intact.

Dad Jokes About Costco: Pun-Filled Quips

1. Why don’t they sell calendars at Costco? Because they have Cost-Plenty!
2. I saw a guy walking out of Costco with a giant bag of almonds. I was like, “Those are some serious Cost-Knows!”
3. What did the dad say when his kids asked if they could go back to Costco? “We’re not Cost-Going back there. We just went!”
4. I just renewed my Costco membership. They said I was their Cost-Most valuable customer!
5. Just saw someone return a kayak to Costco. They said it just wasn’t Costco-effective!
6. Why did the teddy bear say no to the Costco membership? It was already Costco-zy at home!
7. I wanted to buy a whole salmon at Costco, but I was worried it would Costco-much.
8. Heard they were selling a lifetime supply of bubble wrap at Costco. I said, “Don’t be silly, that’s Costco-posterous!”
9. What do you call it when you can’t decide what to buy at Costco? Costco-fusion.
10. My friend said he saw a sign at Costco that said “Everything Must Go!” I told him, “Well, it is Costco.”
11. Why was the dad impressed by the Costco bakery? They really Costco-vered all the bases!
12. What did the dad say when his kids asked him to buy more stuff at Costco? “Look, I love you guys, but there’s a limit to my Costco-ve. “
13. I asked the Costco employee where the mayonnaise was. He pointed and said, “Costco- aisle 5.”
14. They should call the free samples at Costco “Costco-teasers” because they always make me buy more.

Costco Jokes and Puns for Kids

1. Why did the teddy bear go to Costco? Because they had bear-gains!
2. What’s big, round, and everyone gets excited about at Costco? A pizza sample!
3. My dad calls Costco “The Land of Plenty”. I think he just likes the free samples.
4. What did the little cheese say to the giant cheese wheel at Costco? “Wow, you’re sharp!”
5. I lost my dad in Costco once. Turns out he was in the aisle with the giant TVs. No surprise there!
6. What do you call a pirate who loves shopping at Costco? A treasure hunter!
7. How do you make a small drink last longer at Costco? Buy a giant cup!
8. Why do the shopping carts at Costco look sad? Because they’re always getting filled up!
9. What’s a kangaroo’s favorite thing to buy at Costco? Pouch-sized snacks!
10. Where do crayons shop for school supplies? Cray-s-co!
11. Why did the chicken cross the Costco parking lot? To get to the other tide… of laundry detergent!
12. What’s a ghosts favorite place to shop? Costco! Because they have sheet cake.
13. What kind of fruit do they always have in stock at Costco? Plenty-fruit!
14. I wanted to buy some camouflage at Costco… but I couldn’t find any!

Costco Jokes and Puns for Elders

1. You know you’re old when a trip to Costco is considered a “big outing.” The excitement of those free samples, though!
2. I used to think Costco was just for bulk buying. Turns out, it’s also for bulk sleeping. Those aisles are like a lullaby after a certain age.
3. Costco: It’s like a game show where the prize is finding your car afterwards. And who can resist those tempting aisles of stuff you’ll never use?
4. I haven’t seen this many seniors in one place since early-bird dinner at the casino. And just like the casino, you always end up spending more than you planned.
5. I went to Costco for a gallon of milk…and left with a kayak, a year’s supply of paper towels, and a new hip. At least the kayak came with a free churro.
6. My doctor told me to get more exercise… so I power-walked through Costco without buying anything. The prize was keeping my wallet intact.
7. Costco: Proof that you can take the senior out of the shopping spree, but you can’t take the shopping spree out of the senior. Who needs grandchildren when you have bulk discounts?
8. I can’t decide what’s more impressive: the size of Costco or the fact that I managed to find my spouse in there. It’s like a “Where’s Waldo?” but with more Kirkland Signature.
9. They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a Costco membership, and that’s pretty darn close. Especially if it includes a slice of pizza and a hot dog.
10. Costco: Where the samples are free, but the digestive issues afterwards definitely aren’t. Worth it.
11. I joined Costco for the savings, but I stayed for the people-watching. Where else can you witness the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat over the last rotisserie chicken?
12. My grandkids think I’m cool because I have a Costco membership. Little do they know it’s just for the cheap gas… and the samples.
13. I never thought I’d need a map and a compass to go shopping, but then I discovered Costco. It’s like a labyrinth of savings and delicious smells.
14. You know you’re getting old when you start planning your social life around Costco’s free sample schedule. “Is it Tuesday already? The mini quiches are calling my name!”
15. Costco: The only place where you can get a hot dog, a sundae, and a new hearing aid all in the same place. Talk about a senior discount!

Costco Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media

1. Just got lost in Costco for an hour. The good news is, I found my calling. ⛪😂
2. My bank account is on a first-name basis with my Costco membership. 💳😬
3. Costco samples are the glue holding my marriage together. 👫🍕
4. Relationship Status: In love with Costco’s return policy. ❤️💯
5. I go to Costco for the savings, stay for the existential crisis in the paper towel aisle. 🤔🧻
6. You know you’re an adult when getting a Costco membership feels like leveling up in life. ⬆️🎉
7. Costco: Where else can you get a flat tire and a rotisserie chicken in the same trip? 🚗🍗
8. Costco should give out dating advice. They know how to make people commit. 😂💍
9. Spent $200 at Costco. I saved so much money, it feels like I got paid to shop. 🤑💰
10. “Do you ever really need 3 gallons of mayonnaise?” – Someone who’s clearly never been to Costco. 🤤
11. Costco: It’s cheaper to buy a new wardrobe than do laundry. 👚👕👖
12. Just saw someone pushing two overflowing carts at Costco. They’re playing life on legendary difficulty. 🛒🤯
13. My ideal date night? Dinner at Costco’s food court, followed by a romantic stroll through the bulk toilet paper aisle. ✨🧻❤️
14. I’m starting to think my dog actually enjoys going to Costco for the free pets from strangers. 🐶🥰

Rabia Noreen: The Punnovator

Hi, I'm Rabia, the lead punster behind PunnyHub.com, alongside my incredible team. With a background in Comparative Literature, I specialize in turning phrases and crafting chuckles. My team and I are committed to delivering humor that not only entertains but enlightens. Every post we share is designed to sprinkle your day with laughter and a dash of wit. Find your Best Puns & Jokes.

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