145+ Cell Puns & Jokes: You’ve Gotta Be Kidneying Me!
Get ready to LOL 😂 because we’ve got the best cell puns and jokes about cells that are guaranteed to make you laugh! 😉 This hilarious list of humor is perfect for kids and adults alike. From clever wordplay to positively funny observations, prepare to discover the wittier side of science. So, get your funny bone ready, because these jokes about cells are absolutely bursting with laughter! 🎉
Top ‘Cell Jokes’ – Best Picks
- Why don’t cells get along? They have too much static.
- What’s a cell’s favorite movie? “The Silence of the Lambdas.”
- You know you’re spending too much time studying cells when… you start arguing with your plants.
- What did the cell say when he ran into the table? “Mitosis!”
- Why did the cell get in trouble at school? For dividing in the hallway.
- A cell walks into a bar and orders a drink. As he’s paying, he drops a penny. He looks down and says, “Oh darn, I’ve lost my cytoskeleton!”
- Why did the cell cross the microscope? To get to the other slide!
- What’s the most important part of a plant cell? The cell-abration when it divides!
- If you were a cell, what instrument would you play? The trom-bone marrow!
- What did the dad cell say to his daughter cell when he was mad? “We need to have a little cytokinesis!”
- Why do biologists look forward to casual Friday? They get to wear genes to work!
- What’s a cell’s favorite type of clothing? Designer genes!
- I went to a party full of cells last night, and it was amazing! It was totally mitosis!
- What did one cell say to his friend who was feeling down? “Hey, don’t worry. We all go through phases.”
- You must be a red blood cell… Because you really make my heart pump!
- My biology teacher told me to make a cell model… But I accidentally made a prison cell instead!
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Clever ‘Cell Puns’ – Best Picks
- Why did the cell get sent to the principal’s office? It kept throwing nuclei at the other cells.
- What’s a cell’s favorite movie? “The Mitosis Impossible” franchise.
- I tried starting a cell phone company for ghosts… I couldn’t get any signal.
- My cell is so vain, it just divided… Now it has two phones.
- What’s a cell’s favorite type of music? Anything but heavy metal.
- I tried to call a cell on my phone, but it went straight to voicemail. Turns out, it was a eukaryote.
- The cell was arrested for stealing DNA. He claimed it was all just a genetic predisposition.
- Why did the cell cross the microscope? To get to the other slide!
- My friend asked me to name three things that were small. I said… “Your attention span, a bacteria, and that pun you made about my height.”
- What’s a cell’s favorite rapper? Cyto-c.
- You must be a stem cell… Because you’re really something special.
- I walked into a cell phone store and asked for something small and simple. The sales guy pointed at the flip phone and said, “This one’s prokaryotic.”
- What did the Golgi apparatus say to the protein? “You’re looking great, but I think you need to go through one more processing step.”
- What does a cell wear to a party? A semi-permeable membrane.
Funny ‘Cell One-Liner Jokes’ – Short & Funny Cell Jokes
- I tried calling the lost and found, but it went straight to the holding cell.
- My phone battery lasts about as long as a prisoner’s phone call.
- Why did the red blood cell fail biology? It kept getting things confused with the plant cell.
- My friend said his new phone was indestructible. I told him, “Don’t get cell-satisfied.”
- I tried to explain mitosis to a toddler. Turns out, it’s a tough cell.
- Prison must be a great business opportunity. They’ve already got built-in cell towers.
- Never ask a cell to keep a secret, they’re always dividing and gossiping.
- What’s a vampire’s favorite type of phone? A cell phone, of course.
- I walked into a store that only sold cell phone cases… I was floored by the selection.
- I told the jail warden my cell was too small. He said, “Well, that’s just your cell-f image.”
- What data plan do monks use? They rely on cell-service.
- The most rebellious blood cell is the one who refuses to carry oxygen. It’s a real re-bell.
- My phone charger has trust issues. It’s always asking me, “Where have you been all my cell?”
- My doctor told me to increase my fiber intake for better cell production. Guess I need more bars in my diet.
- I wanted to open a prison-themed restaurant, but I couldn’t think of a good cell-ery option for the menu.
- I dropped my phone in the toilet. Now it’s a cell…phone in a cell.
- Why do jail cells have bars? Because a sign would say “No Leaving!” and nobody listens to those.
- What’s the difference between a jail cell and a luxury hotel room? One has bars on the windows, the other charges you an arm and a leg for them.
- Dating apps are a lot like prisons. You spend most of your time scrolling through cells.
Cell QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Cell
- Q: Why did the cell get thrown in jail? A: It had too many bars!
- Q: Why did the cell phone break up with the wifi? A: It said the relationship was too confining!
- Q: What’s a cell’s favorite genre of music? A: Anything but heavy metal!
- Q: What’s a cell’s favorite movie? A: The Silence of the Lambdas! (referring to Lambda phage, a virus that infects bacteria)
- Q: Where do cells keep their money? A: In a cell bank!
- Q: What’s the difference between a cell and a used car salesman? A: One’s a body shop, the other’s a shady lot!
- Q: Why was the cell always in trouble at school? A: It kept getting caught texting during mitosis!
- Q: What do you get if you cross a cell and a computer? A: A know-it-all with a bad connection!
- Q: Why did the cell cross the microscope? A: To get to the other slide!
- Q: What did the cell say when he ran into the table? A: Mitosis!
- Q: What’s a cell’s favorite game to play in the pool? A: Marco-phago! (referencing macrophages, cells that engulf and digest cellular debris)
- Q: Why did the cell fail its history test? A: It studied the wrong organ-elle!
- Q: What do you call a cell that’s always on social media? A: An influ-enz-a!
- Q: Where do hipster cells hang out? A: In the Golgi apparatus… they heard it was really indie.
- Q: What does a cell wear to a fancy event? A: A cyto-plasm tuxedo!
- Q: Why are prison cells always so damp? A: All the convicts keep telling cell-fie stories!
- Q: What did the mama cell say to her daughter cell before a big test? A: Don’t stress, just divide and conquer!
- Q: Why are cells so good at poker? A: They always have a spare ribosome up their sleeve!
Dad Jokes About Cell: Pun-Filled Quips
- What’s a cell’s favorite dessert? Cyto-creampie.
- Hey son, did you hear about the cell who escaped from prison? They’re saying it was an inside job!
- What’s a phone’s favorite type of music? Cell-ebrity pop.
- Why did the cell get lost on its way to the nucleus? It took the cyto-plasm route!
- My biology teacher said I had a bright future studying cells. He said I had real potential.
- Why don’t cells ever win at poker? They always fold under pressure.
- I tried to throw a surprise party for my cell phone. Turned out, I lost signal and couldn’t get in touch with anyone.
- You know what’s even weirder than a talking cell phone? A cell-fish one that never lets you borrow it.
- Why did the cell hate its new apartment? It was cyto-cramped!
- My kid asked me how cells communicate. I told him, they send text messages!
- I thought I had my daughter’s cell phone bill under control. Then I got hit with roaming charges.
- I told my son to be careful not to drop his phone in the ocean. He could lose connection with the real world.
- I asked my phone for some life advice, and it just kept saying, “Go with the flow (chart)!”
- Why was the cell so good at basketball? It had all the right genes.
- Why did the cell cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.
- My phone’s battery life is getting so bad, it’s reached terminal velocity.
Cell Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? Because it had poor cell-ephone reception!
- What’s a jail cell’s favorite TV show? Orange is the New Bars!
- What kind of phone does Dracula use? A cell-ebrity phone!
- Why did the cell phone go to the doctor? It lost all its memory!
- What’s a plant cell’s favorite kind of music? Anything with a good beet!
- Why don’t they play games in prison? Too much cell-ebration when someone wins!
- Where do blood cells go to dance? The vein ball!
- What did the dad cell say to his daughter cell when she was scared of the dark? Don’t worry, I’m cell-ebrating your bravery right here with you!
- Why did the boy bring his cell phone to the bank? He wanted to raise his allowance with inter-cell-t rates!
- What does a cell wear in the winter? A cell-over!
- What’s a bee’s favorite part of a plant cell? The honey-comb!
- What’s a cell’s favorite game to play? Divide and conquer!
- Why did the cell get sent to his room? He was being too cell-fish!
- Where do cells keep their money? In a river bank!
- Why did the cell cross the microscope? To get to the other slide!
- Why was the cell phone feeling sad? He had no one to cell-ebrate his birthday with!
- What do you call a tick on a cell phone? A ring worm!
- Why are plant cells so strong? Because they have cell-ulose walls!
- What did one cell say to the other cell when they bumped into each other? Mitosis!
- What’s a bacteria’s favorite type of phone? A cell phone!
Cell Jokes and Puns for Adults
- Why did the cell get a job at the bank? It knew how to divide and conquer.
- Heard about the prison cell that started a podcast? It’s called “Bars to Bars.”
- My phone battery lasts about as long as a celebrity marriage. Always in and out of court.
- You know you’re addicted to your phone when… your therapist uses it to get your attention.
- A cell walks into a bar and orders a drink. Bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve minors.” The cell replies, “Dude, I’m literally billions of years old.”
- Dating apps are like prisons. Everyone’s looking for a match, but nobody wants to admit they belong there.
- What’s the difference between a prison cell and a luxury car? I know a few people who own both.
- My smartphone is so smart, it automatically corrects my grammar but not my life choices. Seems about right.
- Went to a party full of cells the other night. It was… mitochondria be there.
- I’m reading a book about the history of cellular technology. Turns out, it’s all about… reception.
- My phone is so old, it still remembers when “slide to unlock” was a workout.
- What do you call a cell that just got out of jail? Rehabilitated. Hopefully.
- Just saw a commercial for a phone with 5G. Apparently, 4G wasn’t enough to download my existential dread.
- I put my phone in airplane mode, but it still hasn’t left the country. I guess it’s afraid of commitment.
- My therapist says I need to disconnect from technology and reconnect with nature. So, I bought a camouflage phone case. Problem solved.
- I tried explaining to my phone that I need a break from social media. It suggested I download a new app.
- Why don’t cells gamble? Because they’re always dividing.
- My phone is starting to judge my Google searches. I guess it’s tired of my questionable life choices.
- What’s the difference between a jail cell and a relationship? In a jail cell, you get time for good behavior.
Cell Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media
- My friend tried to make a phone out of prison bars. It was a terrible connection, he just got a cell-sy signal.
- What’s a phone’s favorite dance move? The battery cell-y! 💃🕺
- I tried to explain to my phone how I felt, but it just kept autocorrecting “feelings” to “cell-ings.” Seems like we have some communication issues. 😔
- Why did the cell phone go to art school? It wanted to learn how to draw cell-f portraits! 🎨🤳
- What do you call a plant cell that’s always pumped up? SWOLE-plast! 💪🌿
- My phone’s battery life is getting ridiculous. It’s like it’s conducting its own “cell” – out! 🔋😭
- You know you’ve been on your phone too long when you start photosynthesizing. ☀️🧟♂️ #JustPlantCellThings
- My phone’s been acting really weird lately. It’s almost like it’s…cell-aware. 🤖🤔
- What streaming service do jail cells use? Cell-flix! 🍿👮♂️
- Why do biologists look forward to casual Friday? They get to wear genes to work! 🧬👖 #CellFashion
- If you’re ever feeling down, just remember that somewhere a little ribosome is working hard to make some protein…and that’s pretty “cell”-abratory! 😊💪
- My doctor told me I have low blood sugar. Guess I need some “cell” food! 🤤🍔
- What do you call a cell that loves to gamble? A risk-o-some! 🎲🦠
- I’m starting a band called “The Cell Outs.” We’re gonna be huge…ly microscopic! 🤘🎤
- What’s a cell’s favorite type of music? Anything but heavy metal! 🤘😂 #GetIt
- My biology teacher told me I was average…then he looked at me under a microscope and said, “On second thought, you’re pretty cell-eb!” 😎🔬
- You know, life is a lot like a cell. It’s all about finding your purpose and replicating your success. 🤔🏆 #MotivationMonday
That’s All, Folks! No More Cell-ebrations!
We hope these cell puns and jokes didn’t leave you feeling flat! If you had a good laugh (or even a groan-worthy chuckle), don’t let the fun stop here! Head over to our website for a whole lot more punny business. We’ve got jokes about everything under the sun, from history to geography, and trust us, they’re all mitosis-ly funny!