92+ Castle Jokes & Puns: You Can’t Keep Quiet About!
Get ready to storm the laughter gates with the ✨best✨ castle jokes and puns! 🏰 This list of clever and funny jokes is perfect for kids and anyone who loves a good chuckle. 😂 From knights who say “Ni!” to moats with bad attitudes, we’ve got enough humor to fill a royal banquet hall. 🍖 So pull up your drawbridge, grab your jester hat, and prepare for some pun-derful fun! 🥳
Top Castle Jokes – Best Picks
- What do you call a castle that’s always under construction? A work-in-progress!
- Why did the ghost refuse to haunt the castle? He heard the Wi-Fi was terrible. 👻
- What’s a royal’s favorite board game? Chess-tle!
- How did the prince fix his crumbling castle? He used a knight-time adhesive!
- Why are castle walls so strong? Because they never give in to peer pressure!
- Did you hear about the castle that always lost its keys? It had a moat-ivational problem!
- Why was the castle so cold? It had a bad drawbridge!
- Where do knights park after a long day at the castle? In the knight-club!
- How did the enemy knights know the castle was about to be attacked? Someone blew the wall-et!
- What’s a castle’s favorite music genre? Anything but heavy metal!
- Why was the knight afraid to enter the abandoned castle? He heard it was dragon-free!
- What do you call a castle with lots of plants growing on it? Totally over-grown!
- How did the queen get down the stairs after she sprained her ankle? She used the royal rampart!
Clever Castle Puns – Top Picks
- Why did the knight get lost in the castle? He took the moat traveled path!
- What’s a castle’s favorite board game? Chess, of course!
- This castle is really drafty. It must be haunted by the ghost of wind-ston Churchill!
- I wanted a moat around my castle, but it was too expensive. Now my dreams are just moat point.
- This castle’s WiFi is terrible! I guess the router’s in another dungeon.
- What do you call a castle that’s always under construction? A work-in-progress! (Get it? Works in progress… like defensive walls…)
- Did you hear about the castle that turned into a library? It now has story time in its highest turret.
- I used to be a knight, but I gave up the lance and shield. Now, I’m a freelance dungeon master.
- Be careful not to wake the baby dragons! They’re having a fire-breathing contest later.
- What’s a king’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good moat-town beat!
- This castle is so old, even the ghosts are tired. I guess you could say they’re low spirits.
- I wanted a drawbridge for my castle, but it was a bridge too far. Now I have to settle for a regular old door.
- What do you call a castle made of cheese? A cheesy fortress!
- I heard the king is looking for a new court jester. Think I’ll throw my hat into the moat.
Funny Castle One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Castle Jokes
- I tried to start a dating app for castle enthusiasts, but it turns out it’s all about keeping.
- What do you get if you cross a castle and a cow? A fortified milkshake!
- Did you hear about the ghost who got banned from the castle? They said he kept raising the drawbridge at inappropriate times.
- My friend said he wanted to live in a time where castles were common. I told him to quit living in the medieval ages.
- I’m building a castle out of spare car parts. I call it my “Ford-ification.”
- A king’s life is like a castle… always surrounded by squares.
- Having a drawbridge really elevates a castle’s curb appeal.
- Always be nice to your castle’s dungeon keeper. You never know when you might need a favor from the keymaster.
- What’s a castle’s favorite board game? Chess.
- My dog is part terrier, part gargoyle. He’s the official guard dog of my sandcastle.
- This castle is so old, they still have dial-up internet.
- What’s a ghost’s favorite room in a castle? The wailing room.
- I used to be afraid of heights, but then I conquered my fears. Now, I own a bouncy castle empire.
- I accidentally set off the alarm at the medieval castle. Turns out it was a knight bell.
- Never play hide and seek in a castle. Too much room for dungeonry.
Castle QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Castle
- Q: Why did the ghost refuse to move into the castle? A: He heard it had terrible spirits.
- Q: What do you call a castle that’s always cold? A: A brrr-lin!
- Q: How did the knights get to the castle so quickly? A: They took the moat shocking shortcut!
- Q: Why did the king ban round-table discussions at the castle? A: Too much knight shifting!
- Q: Where do royal bees live? A: In a honey-castle!
- Q: Why did the artist leave his job painting the castle walls? A: He felt creatively walled-in.
- Q: What do you call a castle under construction? A: A work-in-moat-ress!
- Q: Why was the castle always losing its keys? A: It had too many drawbridges!
- Q: What do you call a castle guard who always falls asleep on duty? A: A knight-mare!
- Q: What’s the most important subject in knight school? A: History, they say it’s full of great tales!
- Q: Where do they keep the royal potatoes? A: In the spud cellar, of course!
- Q: Why are castles so good at keeping secrets? A: They’re experts at stonewalling!
- Q: What do you call a castle filled with bakers? A: A castle-roll factory!
- Q: Why did the dragon move next to the castle? A: He heard the knights were having a fire sale!
- Q: What do you call a castle made of cheese? A: A cheesy fortress! Now, brie careful not to eat it!
Dad Jokes About Castle: Pun-Filled Quips
- Why did the king build his castle out of paper? He wanted a drawbridge!
- Did you hear about the castle that was always losing at poker? Apparently, it had a bad moat!
- I told my son the castle we were visiting was built in 1066. He said, “Wow, they finished it just in time!”
- Why did the knight get lost in the castle? He took the wrong turn-style!
- What’s a castle’s favorite board game? Chess, of course. It’s got all the right moves!
- The castle was having a sale on flags… but they were going fast!
- What’s the most knightly music genre? Medieval drum ‘n’ bass-tion!
- I tried to order a pizza to the castle, but they said, “Sorry, we don’t deliver to moats!”
- This castle is so old, they still use a moat-dem for internet!
- What do you call a castle that’s always under construction? A work-in-progress-ment!
- The king had to fire his royal portrait artist. Turns out, he was only painting water colors of the moat!
- Never tell secrets within the castle walls. They have ears-tones!
- What do you call a ghost’s favorite part of the castle? The moat-scary story room!
- Remember, son, life is like a castle… full of drawbridges that you need to let people down for every now and then.
Castle Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the knight get lost in the castle? Because he took the wrong turn-style!
- What do you call a castle that’s always chilly? A cold-stone castle!
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Castle. Castle who? Castle make a great pillow, said NO ONE EVER!
- What kind of music do they listen to in castles? Anything they moosic-like!
- Why are castles so good at keeping secrets? They have lots of stone walls!
- What do you call a castle made of candy? A sweet retreat!
- Why did the ghost refuse to move out of the castle? He had too much boo-tiful history there!
- Where do baby ghosts sleep in a castle? In the crypts! 👻
- Why did the king ban round tables from the castle? He didn’t like the knight life!
- What’s a castle’s favorite board game? Chess-t! ♟️
- How do knights get to a castle on time? They use their trusty steeds! (steeds/speeds) 🐴
- What do you get if you cross a castle and a dragon? A fire-breathing home security system!
- I went to a bouncy castle at the castle yesterday…. That was a knight out I’ll never forget!
- What do you call a group of ghosts who sing in a castle? A boo-tiful choir! 🎶
- Why did the prince sleep like a log? He forgot to close the drawbridge and someone stole the castle sheets!
Castle Jokes and Puns for Elders
- Why did the elder king refuse to renovate his castle? He believed in aging gracefully, even if it meant a few crumbling walls.
- An elder couple was touring a historic castle. The wife shivered, “Did you feel that draft? This place must be full of ghosts!” The husband smirked, “Darling, that’s just the 14th century air conditioning.”
- Why did the retired knight refuse to leave his castle? He’d finally gotten used to the peace and quiet, no more jousting phone solicitors!
- You know you’re getting old when… climbing the castle stairs feels like scaling Mount Everest.
- I met a ghost from a medieval castle the other day. He was surprisingly chill. Just goes to show, we all mellow out in the afterlife.
- What’s an elder dragon’s favorite part of a castle? The elevation. Getting up there is a real pain in the scales these days.
- Heard about the castle that converted into a retirement home? They have a moat and everything! They say the security is unbreachable.
- What do you call a castle inhabited by philosophers? A think tank.
- My friend told me his family tree is rooted in a castle. I told him, “Sounds like you come from sturdy stock!”
- What’s the one room in a castle they don’t show tourists? The elder king’s chambers, it’s full of “medieval medical marvels.”
- Wife: “Honey, aren’t you a little old to be buying a model castle?” Husband: “It’s never too late to rule your own tiny kingdom!”
- I used to be afraid of ghosts in castles… Then I realized they’re probably more scared of what I represent – the future.
- Bought a castle for a steal! It turns out haunting is not good for property value.
- Heard they found a secret passage in Buckingham Palace. Turns out it leads directly to the bingo hall.
- What’s the difference between a young knight and an old knight? One dreams of conquering castles, the other dreams of a good night’s sleep.
Castle Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- Just saw a ghost riding a bike outside the castle. Guess that’s one way to boo cycle around. 👻🚲
- What’s a castle’s favorite board game? Chess… because they’re always up for a good siege. ♟️🏰
- This castle is amazing! What’s the Wi-Fi password? “Enter the dragon.” Classic. 🐉📶
- Tried to make a reservation at a bouncy castle. They said they were fully booked. I guess that’s how they roll. 🤸♀️🏰
- What do you call a castle that’s always under construction? A work in prog- moat!* 🚧🏰
- Just bought a self-help book titled “Inner Peace in your Fortress of Solitude.” Turns out it was just about castle maintenance. I feel so turreted. 📚🏰
- Why did the king constantly banish people to the tower? He had a captive audience. 👑🤪
- You know you’ve spent too much time online when you start referring to your apartment as a “studio castle.” Where’s my moat when I need it? 💻😭
- Why are castles such bad dancers? They have two left turrets. 💃🕺
- Met a ghost at a castle today. He was surprisingly chatty. Guess you could say we really raised the dead over some tea. 👻☕💀
- My friend told me his castle is haunted. I said “Prove it!” …He’s still working on the evidence. 👻🤨
- My biggest fear? Being trapped in a castle with a ghost who keeps moving my keys. I mean, dungeon even get me started. 🗝️👻🤯
Donjon Worry, Be Happy! Castle You Later! 🏰
We hope these castle jokes and puns have tickled your funny bone and made you feel like royalty. But don’t let the laughter end here! For more jokes that will have you laughing from dungeon to turret, explore the ramparts of our punny website.
