90+ Appendix Jokes & Puns: Seriously Gut-Busting Humor!
π Get ready to laugh your appendix off! π Weβve got the best list of appendix jokes and puns this side of the cecum. This ainβt no gut feeling, folks β these jokes are scientifically proven to tickle your funny bone. π¨ββοΈ Whether youβre a kid looking for some potty humor or just someone with a clever sense of humor, this roundup of appendix puns is guaranteed to leave you in stitches! π Ready to get punny? Letβs dive in! π
Top Appendix Jokes β Best Picks
- Why did the appendix get bad grades in school? Because it was always getting removed from class!
- I told my doctor I think I have an appendix. He said, βWell, at least youβre attached to something!β
- Whatβs the appendixβs favorite dating app? Tinderβ¦ theyβre always looking for a connection!
- How do you know your appendix is having a bad day? Itβs a gut feeling.
- What did the appendix say after the surgery? βWell, that was unexpectedly removing!β
- My appendix surgery was a success, but I have to say⦠It was a bit gut-wrenching.
- I went to a doctor who specializes in appendix removal. Heβs a realβ¦cut-up.
- My friend named his appendix Bob⦠He said it was only a matter of time before Bob got the sack.
- You know your health insurance is bad when⦠They cover everything except your appendix.
- Whatβs the opposite of appendicitis? Append-donβt-want-to-see-a-doctor-itis.
- My appendix surgery was so emotional⦠Even the doctors were getting choked up.
- Whatβs an appendixβs favorite type of music? Anything but heavy metalβ¦ they canβt stand the thought of mosh pits!
- I walked into a doctorβs office and asked for an appendix transplantβ¦ The receptionist said, βWe donβt do those here! β¦ Are you sure youβre in the right place?β
- Why donβt they make appendix-shaped stress balls? Because squeezing one would be way too anxiety-inducing!

Clever Appendix Puns β Best Picks
- I told my doctor I thought I had acute appendicitis. He said it was all in my head. Turns out, it was a little lower.
- My friend got his appendix removed and replaced with a thesaurus. It was a synonym for a good time!
- Why did the appendix get bad grades? Because it was always getting removed from class!
- Did you hear about the appendix who went to art school? It was trying to find its true calling.
- What do you call an appendix that thinks itβs super important? ApendiCANT live without me!
- My appendix is writing a tell-all autobiography. He says itβs going to be gut-wrenching.
- Life without an appendix is so confusing! I donβt know what I should and shouldnβt be removing from my grocery list anymore!
- Dating an appendix is rough. They always say they feel attached, but theyβre not sure why.
- This surgery is costing me an arm and a leg⦠well, more like just an appendix, but you get the idea.
- My appendix was removed years ago. Itβs just a footnote in my medical history now.
- Whatβs the opposite of appendicitis? Appendi-donβt-need-an-ice-pack-itis!
- I tried to write a song about getting my appendix removed, but I couldnβt find the right tone.
- My appendix thought it was really cool because it hung out with the colon. Turns out, it was just a toxic relationship.
- You know, I always forget I even HAD an appendixβ¦ until itβs time to make small talk with the surgeon.
- Someone stole the hospitalβs supply of appendixes. The police are looking for someone whoβs clearly up to no gut.
Funny Appendix One-Liner Jokes β Short & Funny Appendix Jokes
- My doctor removed my appendix during surgery, said he was just removing the suspense.
- The appendix is the most extra organ. Itβs like, βIβm not even in the main story, but I can still cause a plot twist!β
- I asked my doctor if my appendix was hereditary. He said, βProbably not, or your parents would have already given you theirs.β
- I told my doctor, βI think I need my appendix removed. Itβs getting really attached!β
- Whatβs the appendixβs favorite font? Times New Roman, because itβs always getting removed.
- You know, having your appendix removed is a lot like a bad infomercialβ¦ itβs completely unnecessary pain.
- My appendix is like that βunsubscribeβ button at the bottom of an emailβ¦ technically there, but nobody wants it.
- I used to think my appendix was useless, then it burst and proved me wrong β now itβs utterly useless AND painful!
- What do you call a book about the appendix? A gut-wrenching read.
- The appendix walked into a barβ¦ then decided to leave because it didnβt want to be the appendix burst.
- My friend said his appendix surgery was a piece of cake. I told him, βEasy for you to say, they didnβt remove any of YOUR organs!β
- Youβve got to hand it to the appendixβ¦ it always takes guts to be that useless.
- My doctor said removing my appendix was elective surgeryβ¦ like I had the option of saying, βNah, I think Iβll keep the ticking time bomb in my abdomen.β
- Iβm writing a book about the appendix. Itβs a short storyβ¦ really short, actually. More like a paragraph.
Appendix QnA Quip β QnA Jokes & Puns about Appendix
- Q: Why did the appendix get bad grades in anatomy class? A: It was always getting attached to the wrong things.
- Q: What did the appendix say when it finally graduated medical school? A: βIβm outtie here!β
- Q: Whatβs an appendixβs favorite Shakespearean play? A: βMuch Ado About Nothing.β
- Q: Why did the appendix get fired from the digestive systemβs band? A: It never had a gut feeling for the music.
- Q: What do you call a group of appendixes who start a singing group? A: A βuselessβ quartet.
- Q: How do you know when an appendix is lying? A: Its story doesnβt seem quite right.
- Q: What do you call a tech-savvy appendix? A: An iAppendix.
- Q: Whatβs the appendixβs favorite dance move? A: The worm.
- Q: Where do appendixes go on vacation? A: Nowhere, theyβre always getting taken out!
- Q: Why did the appendix bring a ladder to the surgery? A: It heard it was going to be an βout of bodyβ experience.
- Q: Whatβs an appendixβs favorite type of book? A: Anything but a gut-wrenching thriller.
- Q: What did the appendix say to the surgeon? A: βHey, donβt take me out, Iβm just hanging around!β
- Q: Why did the appendix cross the road? A: To prove it wasnβt chicken. (Even though it came out in the end).
- Q: Whatβs an appendixβs favorite game show? A: βSurvivor.β (But letβs be real, it always gets voted off the island).
Dad Jokes About Appendix: Pun-Filled Quips
- I told my doctor I thought I might have a rare appendix. He just laughed and said, βThatβs appendickulous!β
- My son asked me what the appendix was. I said, βItβs what comes after the dix.β
- Ever heard of the appendectomy-themed escape room? They really take out the fun of it.
- My wife was worried about her upcoming appendectomy. I told her to relax, itβs a gut feeling, but I think itβll all work out.
- Just found out the hospital charges by the appendix in their waiting room magazines. Talk about a rip-off!
- Heard about the surgeon who removed the wrong appendix? Turns out, he was just following doctorβs orders.
- You know, life without an appendix is so much simpler. No appendix, no appendicitis! See what I did there?
- My doctor said I had a textbook case of appendicitis. I guess I should have read the chapter on βavoiding abdominal pain.β
- Why did the appendix get in trouble at school? Because it was always getting attached to things it shouldnβt.
- I once knew a guy who had his appendix removed twice. They said he was a real cut-up!
- What do you call a beeβs appendix? A pollen tunnel!
- I used to think my appendix was useless. Turns out, it was just biding its time.
- Why donβt they teach appendix anatomy in online school? Because itβs a subject that requires a lot of guts to learn!
- The appendix is like the appendix of the human body. Yeah, you heard that right.
- Why are appendix surgeries so expensive? Because they charge you an arm and a leg⦠and an appendix!
Appendix Jokes and Puns for Kids
- What did the doctor say to the appendix at the costume party? βIβve never seen anyone dress up as an afterthought before!β
- Why did the appendix get in trouble at school? Because it was always getting removed from class!
- What do you call a group of singing appendices? A glee-penddix!
- What do you call an appendix thatβs always positive? An append-optimist!
- My appendix is my favorite organ⦠said no one ever!
- What does an appendix use to write a letter? An appen-cil!
- Why did the appendix cross the road? To get to the other side⦠of the body!
- Knock, knock. Whoβs there? Appendix. Appendix who? Appendix the doctor, itβs time for you to go!
- You know, my appendix wants to be an astronaut when it grows up. It wants to travel to outer space⦠or at least out of my body!
- Whatβs an appendixβs favorite game? Operation!
- Why was the appendix feeling down? It knew it wasnβt really essential.
- I told my friend my appendix was removed last week. He said, βWow, get well soon!β I said, βThatβs the least of my worries now!β
- Whatβs an appendixβs least favorite month? Septem-burp! (Because thatβs when they get backed up!)
- I used to have my appendix, but then I had an append-ectomy! Now I have an append-dixie cup!
- What did the appendix say to the doctor? βCut me some slack! Iβm just a little organ trying to find my purpose!β
Appendix Jokes and Puns for Elders
- My doctor said my appendix was about to burst, and I needed surgery immediately. I told him, βHold on! At these prices? Iβll take my chances!β
- You know youβre getting old whenβ¦your idea of a wild Saturday night is staying up to watch the surgery channel. At least they left in the appendix!
- My grandson asked me what my appendix does. I told him, βNothing now! Itβs retired, just like me.β
- My friend just named his appendix βBob.β I said, βThatβs weird. Why Bob?β He replied, βBecause if things go south, itβs βBye-bye Bob!β
- Heard theyβre making appendix-flavored ice cream now. They say itβs not selling wellβ¦ turns out itβs only appealing to a very niche market.
- I saw a sign that said βAppendix Removal: In and Out in 30 Minutes!β I thought, βSounds like my last date night.β
- Retirement is like your appendix. You know you had it, maybe caused a problem once, but now youβre not really sure what itβs doing there.
- My doctor said Iβm healthier than the average person my age. Guess all those years of running from my responsibilities really paid offβ¦unlike that appendix surgery.
- My doctor offered to remove my appendix for free, as part of his βBuy One, Get One Removedβ special. Too bad heβs a dentist.
- Remember when the worst thing we had to worry about was getting our appendix taken out? Now Iβd gladly trade that for a good nightβs sleep and knowing what day it is.
- People with tattoos are hardcore. But you know whoβs really hardcore? People with appendix scars. We survived an organ removal before it was trendy.
- Just found out human appendixes are considered a delicacy in some cultures. Suddenly, that organ I lost in my 20s feels way more valuable.
- My new dating profile says, βScarred but not scared.β Iβm talking about my appendectomy scar, of course. Ladies love a man whoβs survived abdominal surgery.
- They say your appendix is a vestigial organ, with no real purpose. Kind of like that timeshare I bought in the β80s. Lesson learned: donβt trust anything that starts with βapp.β
Appendix Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- Just had my appendix removed. It was an emotional goodbye, we really bonded in the end. ππ
- My appendix surgery went well! Turns out it was just a gut feeling. π
- My doctor said Iβm one in a million. Guess my appendix took that literally. π
- I asked my doctor if my appendix pains were serious. He said, βNah, they appen-dix times a year.β π
- My appendix wanted to be a writer. It always felt like an afterthought. βοΈ
- Breaking news: Local appendix found. Story still developing. π° (Bonus points for adding a ridiculously irrelevant picture!)
- Life without an appendix is kinda boring. Not gonna lie, I app-miss-dix it. π
- I think my appendix is plotting a comeback. I can feel it in my gut. π¨
- My appendix was removed years ago. I guess you could say weβve grown apart. πΆββοΈπΆββοΈ
- My appendix dating profile says βSmall but mighty.β πͺ (Bonus points for creating a ridiculous dating profile screenshot!)
- Me trying to explain to my appendix that itβs not a vital organ. (Insert meme of someone explaining something to a brick wall.)
- Canβt believe I had to pay a hospital bill for my appendix. Talk about an unexpected expense! πΈ (Shareable meme potential with the right βshockedβ reaction image!)
Thatβs All Folks! No More Appendix Punchlines.
Weβre hoping you didnβt find these appendix jokes too gut-wrenching! If youβre ready for more organ-ized humor, be sure to check out the rest of our punny website. Weβve got jokes about everything from your funny bone to your humerus!