97+ Brooklyn Jokes & Puns: You Can’t Miss These!

Get ready to LOL πŸ˜‚ with the best Brooklyn jokes this side of the East River! We’ve got a list of puns and clever quips that are perfect for kids and adults alike. This borough may be known for its hipsters and bagels, but our Brooklyn jokes? They’re anything but basic. Get ready for some serious humor and get those Brooklyn smiles ready, folks! πŸ˜„

Top Brooklyn Jokes – Best Picks

  1. Why don’t they play poker in Brooklyn anymore? Because they keep raising the Bridge!
  2. What do you call a fake Brooklynite? A Con-ey Island imposter!
  3. How do you make a Brooklyn smoothie? Start with a bagel and schmear, then add attitude!
  4. A tourist asks a Brooklynite, “How do you get to Carnegie Hall?” He shrugs. “Practice? I dunno, I always take the F Train.”
  5. What’s a Brooklynite’s favorite Broadway show? Avenue Q, duh.
  6. Why was the Williamsburg hipster afraid to cross the Brooklyn Bridge? He only used sustainable transportation methods.
  7. I tried to become a Brooklynite, but I wasn’t borough enough.
  8. My friend moved from Brooklyn to Manhattan and said it was life-changing. Yeah, it’s $10,000 a month.
  9. How do you know you’re in a real Brooklyn pizzeria? They only take cash, and they don’t ask if you want a “slice.”
  10. Why did the bagel cross the Brooklyn Bridge? To get to the other schmear!
  11. What’s the difference between a Brooklynite and a pigeon? The pigeon might actually leave something on your car that you want.
  12. I went to a Brooklyn coffee shop that only served locally roasted, fair-trade, organic coffee. It was awful. They should try roasting it in, you know, a roaster.
  13. What do ghosts call the Brooklyn Dodgers? The Afterlife Dodgers!
  14. What’s Brooklyn’s unofficial motto? We put the “grit” in “great.”
Ultimate collection of Best Brooklyn Jokes and Puns, One-liners, Dad Jokes, Funny Quotes, and Captions - Discover engaging and humorous content at PunnyHub.com

Clever Brooklyn Puns – Best Picks

  1. What did the hipster say when he walked into the Williamsburg coffee shop? “Is this Brooklyn, or am I just rye-diculously happy to be here?”
  2. Why don’t they play poker in Brooklyn Heights? Because the steaks are too high.
  3. What’s the most popular dog breed in Brooklyn? A Flatbush Terrier.
  4. I tried to start a dating app in Brooklyn, but… it Coney failed.
  5. Heard about the bagel shop owner who was arrested? Seems he was caught lox-ing in profits illegally.
  6. My friend from Manhattan moved to Brooklyn for the bridge views. I told him, “Prospect of you changing your mind is pretty low.”
  7. What do you call a pigeon that hangs out in DUMBO? A Bridge Troll.
  8. What’s the difference between a Brooklyn hipster and a pizza? The pizza can feed a family of four.
  9. Why did the artist move to Bushwick? He heard the rent was easel-y affordable.
  10. What’s the most popular baby name in Park Slope? Barist-Olivia or Latte-Leo.
  11. I wanted to open a bakery in Brooklyn, but the competition was croissant out of control.
  12. Why did the tree get kicked out of Prospect Park? For being shady.
  13. I’m writing a book about all the cool neighborhoods in Brooklyn. It’s going to be a real page-turner.
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Funny Brooklyn One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Brooklyn Jokes

  1. I tried to make reservations at the hottest new restaurant in Brooklyn, but they said I’d have to wait a bridge and a lifetime.
  2. Someone told me Brooklyn is the new Manhattan. I told them that’s what they said about Brooklyn last year.
  3. A guy walks into a bar in Brooklyn and orders a million beers. The bartender raises an eyebrow and says, “Whoa, why so many?” The guy shrugs and says, “One for me, and the rest to finally afford rent here.”
  4. Heard there’s a new artisanal oxygen bar opening in Brooklyn. Just $20 a breath, or $50 for the “Williamsburg Whisper.”
  5. I saw a sign in Brooklyn that said “Lost Dog – Answers to Brooklyn.” I thought, “Man, that dog’s got it made.”
  6. What’s the difference between a hipster and a pizza in Brooklyn? The pizza can feed a family of four.
  7. My friend from Iowa visited Brooklyn and asked, “Where’s the cornfield?” I told him, “Sir, this is a beard grooming salon.”
  8. I went to a vintage clothing store in Brooklyn and found a shirt from 2018. The guy behind the counter said, β€œWow, retro!”
  9. My friend said he was moving out of Brooklyn because it was too quiet. I told him, “You must be living in someone’s artisanal sourdough starter.”
  10. Someone tried to sell me a “genuine Brooklyn Bridge brick” for $50. I said, “Hey, for that price, throw in a rent-controlled apartment.”
  11. What’s the most common phrase used by a Brooklynite hailing a cab? “You going to Manhattan?”
  12. How do you know you’re in a real Brooklyn coffee shop? They judge you for ordering a decaf latte with soy milk… and then write a poem about it.
  13. I saw a guy walking his dog in Brooklyn wearing a shirt that said “I Heart Gentrification.” His dog looked embarrassed.
  14. You know you’ve lived in Brooklyn too long when you start considering a $3,000/month studio apartment a “steal.”

Brooklyn QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Brooklyn

  1. Q: Why don’t they play hide and seek in Brooklyn? A: Because everyone will keep peeking at the “Brook-lyn” of things!
  2. Q: What’s the most popular type of car in Brooklyn? A: A Park Slope-mobile.
  3. Q: Why was the Brooklyn hipster feeling cold? A: He went too far into Bushwick.
  4. Q: How do you make a Brooklyn smoothie? A: Blend a bagel, a slice of pizza, and a can of PBR.
  5. Q: Why did the Brooklyn Bridge get built? A: No one could sell Manhattan as an island anymore.
  6. Q: What do you call a really crowded day at Coney Island? A: A “Brighton” day!
  7. Q: Why did the comedian move out of Brooklyn? A: He said the rent was getting too steep, even for his “Flatbush” wallet!
  8. Q: What’s the official bird of Brooklyn? A: The crane – there’s always one constructing something.
  9. Q: How do trees in Brooklyn communicate? A: Through Prospect Park-our!
  10. Q: Why did the ghost move to Brooklyn? A: He heard the brownstones were to die for.
  11. Q: What do you get if you cross Times Square with a Brooklyn bakery? A: Times Square bagels – they cost $12 but they’re twice as loud!
  12. Q: What’s the difference between a New Yorker and a tourist in Brooklyn? A: The tourist is the one looking at a map, the New Yorker is the one selling it.
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Dad Jokes About Brooklyn: Pun-Filled Quips

  1. Someone asked me if I knew a good shortcut to Brooklyn. I said, “Sure, take the Brooklynette.”
  2. What did the homesick bagel say? “I’ve had enough of Manhattan, I’m Brooklyn down.”
  3. I met a dog from Brooklyn yesterday. He told me to make myself comfortable, because I was in his Brooklynhouse.
  4. Heard there’s a bakery in Brooklyn that only makes sourdough. Sounds like a real bread-and-Brooklyn establishment!
  5. My friend tried to convince me Coney Island wasn’t in Brooklyn. I told him that was utterly ridiculous.
  6. Why don’t they play hide and seek in Brooklyn? Good grief, have you seen how much Brooklyn space there is?!
  7. Someone stole my pizza right in front of Prospect Park. I guess you could say I was Brooklyn-hearted.
  8. My kid wanted a pet from Brooklyn so I got him a Brooklyn-con. Get it? A Brooklin raconteur? No? Okay.
  9. What do you call a boring event in Brooklyn? A Brooklyn-snore.
  10. I asked my friend from Brooklyn what his favorite book was. He said “A Brooklyncyclopedia!”
  11. Why did the hipster cross the Brooklyn Bridge? To complain about how mainstream it’s become on the other side.
  12. I tried to pay with a Canadian dollar in a Brooklyn coffee shop. The barista said, “Sorry, we only take Brooklyn currency here.”
  13. Why don’t they have fireworks on the Brooklyn Bridge? Because then it would be a Brooklyn-boom!

Brooklyn Jokes and Puns for Kids

  1. Why did the little tree move to Brooklyn? It wanted to be in a cool brough!
  2. What did Brooklyn say to Manhattan? You’re looking Manhattanificent today!
  3. How do you make a Brooklyn smoothie? Start with a brook, then add your favorite fruits!
  4. What’s Brooklyn’s favorite type of music? Anything brook ‘n’ roll!
  5. Why don’t they play hide-and-seek in Brooklyn? Because good luck finding a Brooklyn to hide in!
  6. What’s brown, hairy, and lives in Brooklyn? A Brooklyn coconut!
  7. Why was the Brooklyn Bridge always smiling? It loved connecting people and making them grin!
  8. What happens when it rains in Brooklyn? You get a brook-lyn of puddles!
  9. Where do bees go shopping in Brooklyn? The brook-lyn hive!
  10. What kind of dog do they have in Brooklyn? A Brooklynoodle!
  11. Why did the cookie go to Brooklyn? It wanted to be brook’n into smaller pieces!
  12. What did the ocean say to Brooklyn? Nothing, it just waved!
  13. I took a trip to Brooklyn, but I forgot something important… Oh well, guess I’ll have to brooklyn new one!
  14. What’s a Brooklynite’s favorite board game? Checkers, because they love a good brooklyn jump!
  15. Knock, knock? Who’s there? Brooklyn. Brooklyn who? Brooklyn up, your toys are all over the place!

Brooklyn Jokes and Puns for Elders

  1. Why don’t they play poker in Brooklyn anymore? Because the steaks are too high.
  2. An out-of-towner asks a Brooklynite, “Excuse me, is it pronounced Broo-klyn or Brook-lyn?” The Brooklynite replies, “It’s Broo-klyn, but don’t worry, you’ll get used to saying “What?” eventually.
  3. My grandson moved to Brooklyn to become a musician… …or as we call it back home, “unemployed with expensive rent.”
  4. I went to an art gallery in Brooklyn where they were showcasing “invisible sculptures.” Honestly, I was more offended by the prices.
  5. My friend from Iowa thought those new high-rise condos in Brooklyn were beautiful. I had to tell him, “Those aren’t condos, those are rent-controlled apartments from the 70s, and you can’t afford the property taxes.”
  6. Someone offered me a million dollars for my Brooklyn brownstone! I almost fainted… then I woke up. It was 1982.
  7. What do you call a Brooklyn barista who wins the lottery? “Sir.”
  8. Why did the old Brooklyn bakery close down? It ran out of gluten-free nostalgia.
  9. I saw a sign in a Brooklyn coffee shop that said “Free Wi-Fi and Therapy Dog.” Turns out the dog just judges you really harshly while you check your emails.
  10. You know you’re from Brooklyn when… You consider a bodega bagel a gourmet breakfast.
  11. A tourist asks a Brooklynite, “Can you tell me how to get to Carnegie Hall?” The Brooklynite replies, “Practice?” (A classic with a Brooklyn twist!)
  12. They’re building a new luxury condo in Brooklyn called “The Gentrifier.” It comes with a complimentary sourdough starter kit and a year-long subscription to Bon Appetit magazine.
  13. Why is it so hard to get a good night’s sleep in Brooklyn? You can always hear someone’s dream coming true.
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Brooklyn Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media

  1. What did the hipster say when he walked into the Williamsburg coffee shop? “I’m Brooklyn new grounds.”
  2. You know you’ve spent too much time in Brooklyn when… you consider $8 for a cup of coffee a “steal.”
  3. What’s the most popular type of car in Brooklyn? A Park Slope-mobile (play on the expensive car brand “Porsche”)
  4. Heard about the new dating app exclusively for Brooklynites? It’s called “Bumble and Borough.”
  5. My friend from Iowa asked me what the wifi password is at my Brooklyn apartment. I said, “It’s on the bottom of the router.” He said, “You guys have routers?”
  6. I’m opening a bakery in Brooklyn that only sells sourdough and avocado toast. I’m calling it “Dough or Dough Not, There is No Try.”
  7. What’s a Brooklynite’s favorite type of bridge? A Brook-lynk (link) to Manhattan.
  8. Why did the artist move to Bushwick? He heard it was the next big thing.
  9. Someone stole my artisan kombucha from my Brooklyn stoop. I’m absolutely gutted.
  10. You know you’re from Brooklyn when… you get excited about finding a parking spot within a 5-block radius of your apartment.
  11. My friend said I wouldn’t survive a day in Brooklyn without my phone. I told him, “Challenge accepted…but where can I borrow your charger?”
  12. I wanted to rent an apartment in Brooklyn, but it was too small. It was literally just a Prospect Park bench.

That’s All Folks! Brooklyn Outta Puns.

Hope these Brooklyn puns didn’t “bridge” too much on your patience! If you’re still hungry for laughs, trek over to our website for more pun-derful jokes. We promise, they’re absolutely “Williamsburg” it!

Rabia Noreen & Team

Rabia Noreen: The Punnovator

Hi, I'm Rabia, the lead punster behind PunnyHub.com, alongside my incredible team. With a background in Comparative Literature, I specialize in turning phrases and crafting chuckles. My team and I are committed to delivering humor that not only entertains but enlightens. Every post we share is designed to sprinkle your day with laughter and a dash of wit. Find your Best Puns & Jokes.

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