97+ Time Travel Jokes & Puns: It’s About Time!
Buckle up, history buffs and future astronauts, because we’re about to embark on a journey through the best time travel jokes in the multiverse! ⌚🚀 Get ready for a hilarious list of puns and clever quips about time travel that are fun for kids 😂 and adults alike. Whether you’re a fan of dad jokes or just looking for a good chuckle, this collection of time-travelling humor is guaranteed to have you saying “thyme flies when you’re having fun!” 😉 So, prepare for temporal puns and prehistoric punchlines that are sure to tickle your funny bone! 🦴😂
Top Time Travel Jokes – Best Picks
- Why don’t time travelers ever visit the Middle Ages? Too many knights! ⚔️
- I went to a time-traveling antique shop yesterday. I saw a clock that was going for a steal! 🕰️
- What do you call a time traveler who’s always in a rush? A history buff-et! 🏃♂️💨
- I tried to explain time travel to a caveman. His mind was blown… eventually. 🤯
- Just met a time traveler from the future. Apparently, socks disappear in the dryer in 2042, too. Some things never change. 🤷♀️🧦
- Why did the time traveler bring a ladder to his history lecture? He heard it was about the Roman Empire and wanted a high-archy view. 🏛️🪜
- My friend claims he can see into the future, but he works at a bank. I guess he just has foresight. 🏦🔮
- You know you’ve messed up with time travel when… You’re at your own surprise party… twice. 🎉🤯
- What’s a time traveler’s favorite public transportation? The time warp drive. 🚀
- Why did the historian break up with the time traveler? He said she lived in the past. 💔🕰️
- Time travel is a lot like online dating. You never end up where you thought you would. 📲😕
- I think my dog might be a time traveler. He keeps chasing parked cars. 🐶🚗💨
- Just saw a sign that said “Time Travelers Welcome.” Guess it’s about time! 👋😅
Clever Time Travel Puns – Best Picks
- I tried to time travel to the future to steal some technology, but it was all in vein. (Play on “in vain”)
- Time travel is really taking its toll on me. Especially the tolls. (Play on road tolls)
- Don’t get me started on time travel paradoxes. We could be here for eons. (Play on “eons”)
- Ever tried cooking a chronological order? It’s a recipe for time travel. (Play on chronological order of events)
- I went back in time and convinced Edison to use alternating current. Turns out, it was an electrifying experience. (Play on impactful events)
- Time travelers love clocks. They always know what time it is. (Play on obvious observations)
- If you see a time traveler looking lost, just point them to the nearest clock tower. (Play on finding time)
- I wanted to invest in time travel, but it seemed like a risky venture. (Play on financial risk)
- Packing for time travel is so confusing. Do I pack for the past, present, or future tense? (Play on grammar tenses)
- I finally finished writing my book about time travel. It’s about time. (Play on taking a long time)
- Time travelers are always in such a rush. They’re always pressed for time. (Play on being busy)
- Time travel agencies are really taking off. Business is booming. (Play on successful business)
- I’m not sure about this whole time travel thing. It seems kind of counter-productive. (Play on going against productivity)
Funny Time Travel One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Time Travel Jokes
- Time travel is so confusing – I keep meeting myself before I’ve thought about the things I’m saying.
- My time machine broke down and now I’m stuck in a time loop. At least the food’s good – it’s Groundhog Day every day!
- I went speed dating for time travelers last night. It was really awkward trying to make eye contact with myself across the table.
- They say time heals all wounds, but I think my time machine needs a mechanic.
- I’m not saying time travel is dangerous, but I just saw tomorrow and it didn’t look good for me.
- Tired of your boring job? Just invent time travel and then you can finally say you’ve worked on something for centuries!
- Always borrow money from a time traveler – they can’t get their future hands on you.
- If I could time travel, the first thing I’d do is go back and warn myself about the dangers of time travel.
- The worst part about time travel? Traffic jams are brutal, especially in rush hourglass.
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. Time travelers fly like… well, you know.
- My history teacher keeps talking about time travel paradoxes. I think he’s just trying to avoid my questions about my grades.
- Breaking news: Local man claims he invented time travel, but then he disappeared without a trace… or a when.
- Took my dog time traveling—turns out he’s a real tail-wagger in every century.
- Don’t worry about the future. Or the past. Because if time travel is real, someone from the future is already sick of hearing about it.
Time Travel QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Time Travel
- Q: Why did the time traveler bring a ladder on his trip? A: He wanted to see times square!
- Q: Did you hear about the time traveler who got arrested? A: Yeah, it turns out he was charged with stealing… wait for it… the show!
- Q: Why don’t time travelers ever visit the Stone Age? A: The reception is terrible!
- Q: What do you call a time traveler who’s always in a rush? A: A history speeder!
- Q: What’s a time traveler’s favorite snack? A: A chrono-nut!
- Q: What’s a time traveler’s least favorite song? A: Anything by Nickelback… in any decade!
- Q: What did the time traveler say to the librarian? A: “Do you have any books about paradoxes… from the future?”
- Q: Why is dating a time traveler so complicated? A: They’re always saying, “I’ve seen this relationship before, and it doesn’t end well.”
- Q: Why did the time traveler fail his history test? A: He peeked at the future’s section!
- Q: Why did the time traveler get fired from his job at the clock factory? A: He took too many time-outs!
- Q: How do time travelers pay their bills? A: With temporal currency, of course!
- Q: What happens when a time traveler stubs their toe? A: They experience future pain in the present!
- Q: What do you call a dinosaur that’s really good at time travel? A: A Tyranno-saurus Flex!
Dad Jokes About Time Travel: Pun-Filled Quips
- You know what the coolest thing about time travel would be? Going back in time to before “cool” was a thing. Then you’d be ahead of your time.
- I finally invented a time machine! …It’s about time, right?
- Tried to travel back in time to meet Cleopatra. Turns out, she only dates pharaohs, not failures. Apparently, I have a “type” across the centuries.
- Just got back from the future. Spoiler alert: Your kids still ask for money.
- You think Monday mornings are rough? Try having a fight with your wife in a time machine… Suddenly, EVERYTHING is Monday morning.
- Never invite a time traveler to a potluck. They always bring pastabilities.
- Why don’t time travelers ever use public restrooms? They’re always worried about seeing their future selves in there. Awkward!
- Went back in time to invest in the Roman Empire. Total waste. Turns out their stock market is kinda “fall”-ing apart.
- Heard those ancient Egyptians were way ahead of their time. It’s true. I even saw a mummy using a sarcopha-gus!
- Worst thing about time travel? Airline food is STILL bad in the future. Some things never change.
- Met a guy yesterday who built a time machine out of a DeLorean. Turns out, he’s always getting into hot water.
- Just realized something profound about paradoxes. They’re just time travelers having a really bad hair day.
- Me: “I wish I could go back in time and relive today.” Wife: “You mean, without listening to my stories?” 😂
Time Travel Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why don’t time travelers use pencils? Because they always run out of the future!
- What do you call a time traveler who’s always in a hurry? A hasty-ory buff!
- Knock, Knock. Who’s there? A Time Traveler. A Time Traveler who? Knock, knock! (Because they already knocked from the future!)
- What’s a time traveler’s favorite snack? A Time Out bar!
- How do you know if a dinosaur is visiting from the past? He’s got a dino-mite tan!
- Why did the time traveler bring a ladder to the library? He wanted to check out a book from the past!
- What do you call a time machine that’s always breaking down? A real time-waster!
- Why did the time traveler get lost on his trip? He took a wrong turn in the past!
- What happens when you travel to the future for a few seconds and come back? You get future shock!
- What do you call a group of time travelers arguing? A heated debate!
- Teacher: “Can anyone give me an example of future tense?” Little Timmy: “Um… I will be ten next year?”
- What do time travelers use to dry their hair? A time blower!
- Did you hear about the time traveler who went back to meet Cleopatra? He said she was really down to earth!
- Where do pirates park their time machines? At the arrr-chives!
- Why did the time traveler bring a camera to the past? He wanted to take some historical photos!
Time Travel Jokes and Puns for Elders
- Why don’t time travelers use dating apps? They say the lag is unbearable.
- I met a time traveler who claimed to be a ‘Chronological Casanova.’ Apparently, he had romances in every century. Turns out, it was just a clever way to hide his commitment issues.
- Heard about the time traveler who invested in real estate at the dawn of civilization? He’s got a prehistoric portfolio.
- Went to a seminar on time travel, but I left halfway through. The ending was too predictable.
- They say time heals all wounds, but time travel? That just lets you revisit all your biggest blunders in HD.
- My retirement plan? Perfect my time travel machine. Then I can finally tell my 20-year-old self to invest in that little company called “Google.”
- Tried explaining the concept of “Netflix and Chill” to a time traveler from the 1950s. Let’s just say, things got very awkward, very quickly.
- My grandfather, the time traveler, gave me some excellent advice: “Buy low, sell high, and whatever you do, don’t talk to yourself.”
- I think I met a time traveler at the bingo hall the other day. He kept muttering about how we were living in a “golden age.”
- Wife got mad because I bought a time machine before fixing the leaky faucet. “Time waits for no man,” I explained. She said, “Neither does a plumber.”
- You know you’re old when you start reminiscing about the future. “Those were the days,” I’ll tell my grandkids. “Flying cars, robot butlers…and we still hadn’t solved global warming.”
- Doctor: “I’m afraid I have some bad news. You only have 24 hours left to live.” Me: “Can I have two 12-hour shifts instead?”
- Time travel is like a fine wine. Gets more paradoxical and headache-inducing the more you think about it.
- You know you’ve messed up with time travel when… your younger self has already filed a restraining order against you.
Time Travel Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- My time machine broke down and all I got was this lousy T-Rex… Now I have to walk it. #PrehistoricProblems
- People who talk in the movie theater really grind my gears… Guess I’ll go back in time and watch it before they were born.
- Tried explaining time travel paradoxes to my dog… He just stared at me like I was fetched.
- Breaking News: Local man arrested after stealing a DeLorean. Authorities say he’s charged with a moving violation… through time.
- What do you call a time traveler who’s always late? A history re-peater!
- Just met my past self. Awkward much? We had nothing in common.
- They say time travel is impossible… but then how do you explain sweatpants? Fashion mistake or temporal anomaly? You decide.
- Went too far back in time and now my phone charger is considered a weapon of sorcery. This is the real danger of time travel, folks.
- History may repeat itself, but with time travel… It’s more like history gets an angry, incoherent rewrite.
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes… So I built a time machine. Now, who wants their money back?
- You know you’ve time traveled too much when… even your dog gives you a side-eye when you enter a room.
- What’s a time traveler’s least favorite subject? History. They’ve heard it all before.
Time flies when you’re reading time travel puns!
Time flies when you’re having pun, and hopefully these time travel jokes really flew by! If you’re still hungry for more hilarity, don’t be a lazy bones – hop on over to our website for a truly rib-tickling experience. We promise, it’ll be time well-spent!
