106+ Crying Jokes & Puns: You’ll LOL, I’m Tear-ibly Funny!

Get ready to laugh until you cry (tears of joy, of course!) 😂 We’ve compiled a list of the best crying jokes and puns that are sure to tickle your funny bone! This hilarious humor is perfect for kids and adults alike – because who doesn’t love a good chuckle? Get ready for some clever wordplay and silly jokes, because this list of knee-slappers is sure to have you in stitches! 😭🤣

Clever Crying Puns – Top Picks

1. Feeling emo? Must be thyme to cry. 🌿
2. Crying over spilled milk? That’s udderly ridiculous. 🐄
3. Shedding tears at the zoo? Those are croc tears! 🐊
4. Crying while chopping onions? It’s a real tear-jerker! 😭
5. Sad movie got you down? Don’t worry, it’s just waterworks. 💧
6. Crying during a breakup? Consider it emotional drainage. 💔
7. Tearful about burnt dinner? Well, that’s a crying shame. 🔥
8. Overwhelmed and weepy? Sounds like a case of the boo-hoos!👻
9. Emotional rollercoaster got you sobbing? Buckle up, it’s a tear-ific ride! 🎢
10. Crying over a sad book? Must be a real page-turner! 📖
11. Tear ducts working overtime? Someone’s feeling the water weight. 🏋️‍♀️
12. Sad song got you down? Time to drown your sorrows…in tissues. 🎶
13. Weeping over bad news? Chin up, it could be a mist-opportunity. 🤔
14. Crying at a wedding? Hey, at least they’re tears of joy! 🎉

Top Crying Jokes – Best Picks

1. I saw a sign that said “Watch for Crying Babies.” So I thought, “That’s ridiculous! Who looks at a crying baby and thinks ‘Ooh, collectible!'”
2. You know you’re a crier if… your tear ducts are listed as a water source on Google Maps.
3. Why did the baby strawberry cry? His parents were in a jam!
4. What do you call a crying motorcycle? A bawl-bearing!
5. My friend tried to tell me my tears meant nothing. I know what you’re thinking, and yes, I cried about it.
6. What’s the difference between an onion and a sad story? Nobody cries when you chop up a sad story.
7. I saw an ad for waterproof mascara. Immediately thought, “Challenge accepted!”
8. Why are ghosts such bad liars? Because you can see right through their boo-hoos.
9. Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny!
10. My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. I’m still hugging that pint of ice cream I ate last night.
11. What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry!
12. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
13. What do you call it when a group of apes starts a singing group? A gorilla choir!

Funny Crying One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Crying Jokes

1. I saw a sign that said “Watch for Crying Babies” – so I started doing an interpretive dance.
2. You know, onions don’t make me cry… calendars do, especially the part where it says “April, May, June…”
3. I met a magician who could make crying babies disappear. Turns out, he’s just really good at hiding in my basement.
4. The ocean is so salty because the land never waves back, get it? I’ll just go cry in the corner now.
5. I used to think I was empathetic… turns out, I’m just lactose intolerant. All that crying over spilled milk was a dead giveaway.
6. My therapist suggested I embrace my mistakes. Now I’m walking around hugging crying babies.
7. What do you call a crying motorcycle? A bawl-bearing!
8. You’re not crying, you’re just… leaking happiness from your eyes.
9. I saw an ad for waterproof mascara that said “Cry all you want.” Sounds like a challenge!
10. I told my friend all my problems. He hugged me and said, “There, there…” I guess he ran out of advice.
11. What do you call a fake noodle who’s really emotional? An impasta! cries in Italian
12. I don’t cry during sad movies. I cry during cooking shows when they cut open an onion. So many layers! 😭
13. Remember, folks: crying is just your eyes sweating out all the sadness. So get your workout on! 💪

Crying QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Crying

1. Q: Why did the onion go to the therapist? A: It needed to work through some deep-seated cries.
2. Q: What do you call a crying mime? A: A silent sob story.
3. Q: Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? A: Too many cheetahs…and you’d hear a lot of cry-noceros if they lost!
4. Q: What did the left eye say to the right eye after a sad movie? A: “Between you and me, something smells.”
5. Q: What do you call an emotional robot? A: A cry-borg.
6. Q: What do you call a sad strawberry? A: A blueberry!
7. Q: Why did the baby ghost cry? A: He couldn’t boo-lieve how childish the other ghosts were being.
8. Q: What do you call a sad cup of coffee? A: Depresso.
9. Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award? A: He was outstanding in his cry-field.
10. Q: What do you call a crying motorcycle? A: A Yamaha-ha-ha… get it? It’s a sad bike.
11. Q: What do you call a sensitive cowboy? A: A cry-baby back ribs.
12. Q: Why are peppers bad at hiding? A: Because they get jalapeno-tears in their eyes!
13. Q: What did the ocean say to the beach at low tide? A: “I’m feeling wave-y today… and not in a good way.”
14. Q: Why don’t vampires like emotional movies? A: They hate seeing all that cry-mson flow.
15. Q: What should you do with a crying alphabet? A: Console it and tell it that “U R loved.”

Dad Jokes About Crying: Pun-Filled Quips

1. I saw a sign that said “Caution: Crying Babies Ahead.” Sounded like a real wail-way to me!
2. What do you call a crying French pastry? A croissant in despair!
3. My wife told me to take the spider out instead of crying about it. So I took it to the movies. It loved the cry-fi thriller we saw!
4. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs… and because everyone cries ‘jaguar’ when they lose!
5. My friend tried to make tear-shaped pasta from scratch. They were im-pastable!
6. Did you hear about the restaurant that opened on the moon? I heard the food was good, but it had no atmosphere… just a lot of crying babies! (Astronauts have feelings too, you know!)
7. My wife got mad at me for crying at the end of the movie “Titanic”. I told her, “C’mon, it was a tear-jerker!”
8. Why do onions make you cry? Because they’re having a gas… and they don’t care who knows it!
9. Why are babies so good at poker? They have a great cry-face!
10. I tried to explain to my son why we cry when we’re happy, but it just made him more upset. He said, “I’m not crying, Dad, You are!”
11. My daughter told me she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. I told her to start practicing her crying now, because the business is tough!
12. I saw a magician turn water into tears. I think it was a cry-ncidence!
13. Someone stole my mood ring. I don’t know how I feel about it… starts crying uncontrollably
14. You know, they say tears are a sign of strength… I must be the strongest person in the supermarket’s onion aisle.

Crying Jokes and Puns for Kids

1. Why did the baby onion cry? Because it was having a little cry-sis!
2. Why did the ocean cry? It had too much salt water!
3. What do you do with a crying baby pepper? You give it a bib and try to chili it out!
4. What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeno business!
5. What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
6. Knock, knock? Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce Who? Lettuce in! It’s cold out here!
7. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because she was stuffed!
8. Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
9. What musical instrument do babies like? Rattle-drums!
10. What did the math book say to the guidance counselor? “I have so many problems!”
11. Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? To the baa-baa shop!
12. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
13. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!

Crying Jokes and Puns for Elders

1. Why don’t they have crying rooms in casinos? Because they already have slot machines for that!
2. I tried to explain to my grandson what a tear-jerker movie is. He looked at me confused and said, “Grandpa, isn’t that just called ‘The News’?”
3. My wife asked me if I’d cry at her funeral. I told her, “Darling, I cry at commercials, what do you think?”
4. Doctor said I might be lactose intolerant. I said, “So what? Now I can’t cry over spilled milk?”
5. My friend started crying when I told him about my gambling addiction. Turns out, he was my bookie.
6. You know you’re getting old when… You need a good cry, but all you can muster is a dry cough.
7. The toughest part about growing old? Your eyesight goes, your memory fades, and your tear ducts work perfectly.
8. What do you call an onion with a gambling problem? A cry-bet-onion!
9. My friend cried when he finished reading my autobiography. He said it was such a tragic waste of paper.
10. Just saw a sign that said “Caution: Senior Marathon.” I thought, “That’s nothing, you should see me try to open a pickle jar.”
11. Retirement is great… You finally have time to cry about how little money you have.
12. I’m at that age where instead of crying over spilled milk… I just ask someone else to clean it up.

Crying Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media

1. My wallet is always crying poor. Guess it’s got a bad case of the “emp-tees.” 💸😭
2. Just saw a movie about punching clocks. Absolutely brutal. I was in tiers. 😭👊
3. What do you call a crying condiment? A saucy situation. 🌶️😭
4. My phone battery is always on the verge of tears. It’s got major charging issues. 🔋😭
5. Tried to explain to my friend why onions make you cry… It was a moving conversation. 🧅😭
6. I cry every time I do math. It’s just so mean to the numbers. 😭➗
7. Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened… unless it’s your internet, then you have every right to cry. 😭💻
8. What do you call a group of sad trees? A weeping willow family reunion. 🌳😭
9. My bank account is so empty, even the moths are crying. 💸😭
10. I saw a sign that said “Watch for Crying Children.” How can you tell if they’re crying before you hit them? 🤔😭
11. You butter believe it, I cried when I ran out of croissants. It was a real butter-ful moment. 🥐 😭
12. I went to a seafood disco last night… I pulled a mussel trying to cut a rug. 💪🕺😭

Rabia Noreen: The Punnovator

Hi, I'm Rabia, the lead punster behind PunnyHub.com, alongside my incredible team. With a background in Comparative Literature, I specialize in turning phrases and crafting chuckles. My team and I are committed to delivering humor that not only entertains but enlightens. Every post we share is designed to sprinkle your day with laughter and a dash of wit. Find your Best Puns & Jokes.

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