145+ Guitar Puns & Jokes: Strumming Up Some Laughter
Get ready to strum up some laughter because you’re tuned in to the best guitar humor on the web! 😂 This isn’t just some chord progression of mediocre puns – we’ve assembled a list of clever jokes about guitars that’ll have you roaring (or at least chuckling). 😉 Whether you’re a seasoned musician or just starting out, these funny puns and kid-friendly jokes are sure to strike a chord. 🤘 Get ready to unleash your inner comedian with these positively hilarious guitar jokes! 🎸
Top ‘Guitar Jokes’ – Best Picks
- Why did the guitar go to the doctor? Because it had a fret!
- You know you’re a bad guitarist when… even your dog covers its ears.
- What do you call a guitar that’s always out of tune? A string theorist’s nightmare!
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a tuna fish? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish.
- Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor!
- What do you call a group of guitarists who can’t stay in sync? A string quartet… just kidding!
- Why are guitars so loud? Because they’re always amped!
- My wife told me to take the spiderwebs off my guitar… I told her, “No way, it’s vintage!”
- What’s a guitarist’s favorite drink? Anything with a good pick-me-up!
- Why don’t they let electric guitars into church? They’re too heavy metal!
- My guitar gently weeps… mostly because I keep playing the wrong chords.
- How do you get a guitarist to play quieter? Give them a sheet of music!
- I wanted to learn to play guitar, but my fingers are too short. I guess I’ll just have to stick to air guitar for now.
- Why did the bassist get lost on his way to the gig? He took a wrong turn at the fretboard!
- You know you’re obsessed with guitars when… you name your kids Fender and Gibson.
- What kind of guitar does a grizzly bear play? A beargitone!
- Why are guitarists bad dancers? Because they always step on their wah-pedals!
- My dog ate my guitar pick. Now he’s a… Chew-ner!
Clever ‘Guitar Puns’ – Best Picks
- What do you call a guitar that’s always getting into trouble? A gui-tar-rible influence.
- Why was the guitar so tired after the concert? It left it completely fretted.
- Did you hear about the guitar that went to art school? It specialized in string art.
- My guitar’s been feeling a bit under the weather. I think it’s got a touch of the blues.
- I tried to write a song on a broken guitar. No strum, no cry.
- I’m starting a dating app for guitars. It’s called “Fender bender.”
- What’s a guitar’s favorite type of cheese? String cheese!
- My guitar is so out of tune, it’s offensive. It’s playing a-salt to my ears.
- I took my guitar to the doctor. Turns out, it just needed to be re-strung.
- Why did the guitar cross the road? To get to the gig on the other side.
- Don’t tell secrets near a guitar. They’re always listening with their sound holes.
- My guitar is starting to think it’s a drum. It keeps saying, “Beat it!”
- I walked into a guitar store. It was music to my ears.
- You know your guitar playing is bad when… …the audience starts playing air-mute.
- My dog ate part of my favorite guitar songbook. Now it’s just got chew-nes.
- I wanted to learn to play acoustic guitar, but it was too expensive. So I got a loan instead.
- My guitar only knows one song. But boy, can it play the strings out of it.
- I tried to explain to my guitar how I was feeling. But it just wouldn’t pick up what I was putting down.
- What’s a guitar’s favorite color? Blues!
- My guitar is my therapist. It lets me spill my guts without interrupting.
Funny ‘Guitar One-Liner Jokes’ – Short & Funny Guitar Jokes
- What do you call a guitar that’s always out of tune? A fretful instrument.
- My guitar gently weeps, usually when I try to play it.
- You know you’re a guitarist when your idea of a balanced diet is a beer in each hand.
- Why did the guitar teacher break up with the drummer? Because they couldn’t find their rhythm together.
- I used to be addicted to the guitar, but then I realized I could just pick it up anytime.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish!
- My guitar is so old, it remembers when ‘Stairway to Heaven’ was just a fire hazard.
- Life is like a guitar solo – it’s all about the bends and not the frets.
- The guitar is a great instrument. Pick one up today.
- I told my wife she was like my guitar; I loved playing with her. She didn’t find it very romantic.
- Did you hear about the guitarist who was always in trouble? He had too many strings attached.
- Why did the guitar go to the doctor? It kept losing its voice.
- A guitarist walks into a library looking for books about paranoia. The librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
- I saw a sign that said “Guitar for Sale – Cheap. No Strings Attached.” I thought, “That’s useless!”
- My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. So, I took it to a guitar lesson.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a tuna sandwich? You can’t tune a tuna sandwich.
Guitar QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Guitar
- Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested? A: He got caught fingerpicking!
- Q: What’s a guitarist’s favorite font? A: Times New Roman-tic.
- Q: Why did the guitar go to the doctor? A: It had a fret!
- Q: Why don’t they let electric guitars gamble in Las Vegas? A: They always go all in with their pickups!
- Q: Why did the guitar string get bad grades in school? A: It kept getting played during class!
- Q: How do you make a guitar more aerodynamic? A: Take off the whammy bar!
- Q: Why did the guitar blush? A: Because it saw the bass player checking out its curves!
- Q: What’s a guitarist’s favorite type of cheese? A: String cheese, of course!
- Q: What’s the most popular guitar in Korea? A: Seoul-o!
- Q: Why are guitarists such good storytellers? A: They know how to spin a yarn.
- Q: Why was the guitar out of tune with the rest of the band? A: It was always marching to the beat of its own drum!
- Q: What kind of guitar does a vampire play? A: A 12-string…because it’s always got bats in the belfry!
- Q: What do you call a guitar that’s always late? A: A procrast-in-tune-ator.
- Q: Why did the guitar teacher bring a ladder to the lesson? A: To reach the high notes!
- Q: What did the classical guitar say to the rock and roll guitar? A: “You rock, I’ll roll with it!”
- Q: Why did the guitar cross the road? A: To get to the gig…what else?!
- Q: What’s a guitarist’s favorite drink? A: Anything he can play “Tequila Sunrise” with!
- Q: What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? A: You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish!
Dad Jokes About Guitar: Pun-Filled Quips
- Why did the guitar go to the doctor? It had a string of bad gigs.
- My son asked for a guitar for his birthday, so I got him a ukulele. I told him, “Don’t worry, it’s just a little fret-board.”
- You know what’s even harder than playing a twelve-string guitar? Tuning it… Strums air guitar dramatically
- What’s a guitarist’s favorite type of tea? Anything with a good pick-up!
- A guitarist walks into a library. What does he say? “Can you turn the volume up? I can barely hear the books!”
- What do you call a guitar player who only knows one chord? A music critic!
- Why are guitars so good at keeping secrets? They’re excellent at holding frets!
- Did you hear about the guitar that was always plugged in? It had serious commitment issues.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can’t tuna fish. Winks
- I used to play guitar in a rock band, but we were always flat broke. Guess we were just tone deaf to financial advice.
- What do you get when you drop a guitar down a mineshaft? A flat minor. Shakes head sadly
- I tried to write a song on a fretless guitar. No matter how hard I tried, there were just no boundaries.
- Why don’t they let electric guitars gamble? They always raise the stakes!
- My wife hates it when I crank my guitar amp. She says it’s all treble.
- Why did the guitar teacher get arrested? He got caught fingering a minor!
- You know, learning guitar isn’t that hard. It’s getting others to listen that’s the real challenge.
- My friend tried to sell me his old guitar, said it was “vintage.” Turns out, it was just old and out of tune.
- If you rearrange the letters in “acoustic guitar” you get “coat is urging.” …Coincidence? I think not.
- What’s a guitarist’s favorite drink? Anything on tap! Taps head knowingly
Guitar Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why did the guitar teacher have so many students? Because he was always fretting about getting new ones!
- What’s a guitar’s favorite drink? Anything stringed together!
- Why did the guitar go to the doctor? It needed to be re-strung!
- Why did the guitar wear sunglasses? Because it was a rock star! 😎
- How do you make a guitar lighter? Pick off the heaviest strings!
- What do you call a bear that plays the guitar? A bear-itone!
- Why was the guitar afraid of the stage? It had stage fright!
- My guitar used to be in a rock band, but it got kicked out… …for being too acoustic!
- Why are guitars such bad liars? You can always see right through them!
- What kind of guitar does a spider play? A web-tuned guitar!
- Why did the guitar teacher bring a ladder to class? To reach the high notes!
- What’s a guitar player’s favorite fruit? A string-bean!
- Where do guitars sleep? In a band camp!
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can’t tuna fish!
- What’s a guitar’s favorite type of math? Multi-plywood!
- My guitar is always arguing with the drums… I guess you could say they’re always in a band fight!
- Why don’t guitars ever win races? They’re always slowing down for the pick-up!
- What’s a guitar player’s favorite subject in school? History, because it’s full of strings of events!
- Knock knock! Who’s there? Guitar. Guitar who? Guitar-ing ready to rock! 🎸
Guitar Jokes and Puns for Adults
- Why did the guitar tech go to jail? He got caught fingering a minor!
- You know you’ve been playing guitar too long when… you can tune out your spouse using only three chords.
- I tried to write a song about erectile dysfunction using only my guitar… but I just couldn’t get it up to tempo.
- My wife left me because I love my guitar more than her. I guess you could say it’s officially “unplugged” now.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish…unless you’re a very skilled sushi chef.
- My therapist told me to replace my destructive habits with healthy ones. So instead of chain-smoking, I chain-smoke guitar solos. It’s progress, right?
- I told my wife my dream was to make a living off my guitar playing. She said, “You really need to dream bigger. They have apps for food delivery now.”
- A guy walks into a pawn shop and sees a beat-up old guitar with a sign that says “Talking Guitar – $10.” Intrigued, he asks the pawnbroker, “Does it really talk?” The pawnbroker shrugs and says, “Only when it’s spoken to.”
- Why do guitarists always have to bring all their gear everywhere? Because you never know when you’ll need to impress someone with the size of your amp…and compensate for other things.
- Why was the guitar teacher such a bad gambler? He kept betting on a flat third.
- What’s a guitarist’s favorite pickup line? “Hey baby, I can play you like you’ve never been played before.”
- My friend says he’s reached a whole new level of meditation through playing guitar. He calls it “transcendental shreditation.”
- Why are guitars like metaphors? Because most people don’t understand them until they’re explained…and even then, it’s still debatable.
- I tried to explain to my partner that playing guitar is like making love. They didn’t buy it when I said I needed ten pedals and a wah-wah to get started.
- Why did the guitar go to therapy? It had too many frets.
- My doctor told me I needed to find a way to relieve stress. So I started learning guitar. Now I need to find a way to relieve the stress from my terrible guitar playing.
- They say behind every great man is a great woman. Behind every great guitarist is… a wall full of gear they can’t afford.
- Dating a musician is fun. Every date is like a surprise concert…if you consider off-key renditions of “Wonderwall” a surprise.
- What do you call a guitarist who’s always breaking up with his band? A serial picker.
Guitar Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media
- Why did the guitar go to the therapist? Because it had too many frets!
- You know you’re a guitarist when… your browser history is just different ways to google “how to play Wonderwall”.
- Just saw a guy shredding on a guitar made of stone. Talk about a heavy metal concert.
- What do you call a guitar player who’s always cold? A minor threat!
- My guitar gently weeps, they say. Sounds like a personal problem, honestly.
- I wanted to learn how to play guitar by watching YouTube videos… but I couldn’t find the chords to the internet.
- My bank account is like a guitar solo. Mostly empty with a few high notes.
- What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish!
- I tried to write a song on the guitar using only natural harmonics… it sounded ethereal, but nobody could hear it.
- My neighbor’s guitar playing is like his apartment: Acoustic. You can hear everything.
- Why are guitars such bad liars? Because they string you along!
- My dog is a terrible guitar player. He keeps hitting the paw-ls.
- I used to play bass, but I switched to guitar. Turns out, I prefer being the root of all riffs.
- Just saw a guitar for sale, made entirely of spaghetti. Must be an axe-cellent deal!
- A guitar walks into a bar and says, “Hey, I’m lookin’ for a gig.” The bartender says, “Sorry, we only serve minors.”
- What’s the most metal part of a guitar? The heavy metal strings, duh.
- Life is a lot like playing guitar. You have to learn the chords before you can shred.
- My friend told me his guitar playing was getting better with age. I told him, “Yeah, it’s definitely vintage now!”
- How can you make seven guitars sound like one? Hand them out to beginners!
That’s All, Folks! Tune in Later for More Fretful Fun.
We hope these guitar puns and jokes struck a chord with you! If you’re still feeling fretful for more laughs, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Tune in to our website for a whole orchestra of hilarious puns and jokes that will have you roaring with laughter.
