92+ Crustacean Jokes & Puns: Shell-arious Ocean Humor!
🦀 You’re🦀 in 🦀 for 🦀 a 🦀 treat! 🦀
Get ready to laugh your shells off because we’ve got the best crustacean jokes this side of the Mariana Trench! 😂 This list of puns and funny jokes about crabs, lobsters, and their pincer-wielding pals is shore to tickle your funny bone. Whether you’re a kid or just a kid at heart, get ready for some clever humor and fintastic puns. Let’s dive in! 🦞
Top Crustacean Jokes – Best Picks
- Why did the shrimp refuse to share his treasure? He was a little shellfish. 🦐
- What did the ocean say to the crab who got a job at the bank? You’re finally getting some shell-curity! 🏦🦀
- Why did the hermit crab cross the ocean floor? To get to the other tide! 🌴🦀
- How did the lobster afford his new house? He got a home shell-oan! 🏡🦞
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal! 🤘🎸🦀
- Why don’t they allow crustaceans in the orchestra? Too much clapping! 👏🦀
- What do you call a crab that’s a sore loser? A crabby patty! 😠🍔
- Where do sophisticated lobsters go for dinner? The prawn shop! 🦐🍷
- What’s a crab’s favorite brand of jeans? Shell-roith! 👖🦀
- You know, I met a hermit crab once… Pretty impressive guy, he pulled himself up by his bootstraps! 💪🦀
- What did the shrimp say when he was surrounded? We’re in a pinch! 🤏🦐
- I just bought a vintage record of sea shanties sung by a crab… Turns out it’s a really rare claw-ssic! 🎶💿🦀
- How do crustaceans pass their driving test? They just claw their way to success! 🚗🦀
- What’s a crab’s favorite month? Septem-burr! 🍂🦀
- Why don’t crustaceans donate to charity? They’re too shellfish! 🦀😔 (Okay, we had to end with a classic!)
Clever Crustacean Puns – Top Picks
- Why did the crustacean get bad grades? Because he was always shell-shocked in class!
- What do you call a crustacean with an attitude? A crabby patty!
- Did you hear about the crustacean fashion designer? He was known for his cutting-edge shell designs.
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Crab Core!
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite dance move? The pincer-twirl!
- Why did the crustacean cross the ocean floor? To get to the other tide!
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite magazine? Claw-smopolitan!
- Why did the crustacean refuse to share his food? He was being shellfish!
- What do you call a crustacean with a PhD? An intellecrab!
- What did the crustacean say when he saw the ocean liner? “Well, ship happens!”
- How do crustaceans call their friends? On their shell phones!
- The crustacean comedian was a real crowd-pleaser. Everyone was clapping!
- I tried to make a crustacean sculpture, but it just fell apart. Guess it wasn’t very well-crab-ted!
- What do you get when you cross a crustacean and a ghost? A boo-tiful crab!
Funny Crustacean One-Liner Jokes – Short & Funny Crustacean Jokes
- Did you hear about the crustacean who won an award? He was really crabtivated by the honor.
- I’m feeling crabby today. Must be a sign of the zodiac…or maybe I’m just a crustacean at heart.
- My attempt at stand-up comedy went so badly, I think I left the audience shellfish.
- Dating a lobster is complicated. It’s hard to tell if he’s really into you or just lobstering you along.
- I’m not saying I’m lazy, but I relate to crustaceans on a spiritual level. We both love a good shell-abration.
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good shellection!
- Life is like a box of crustaceans…you never know what you’re gonna get. Unless it’s claws, you’re always gonna get claws.
- I’m writing a children’s book about a crab who goes to school. It’s called “The Littlest Crab And The Great Big Shell-ebration”.
- I saw a crab walking down the street wearing a tie. I thought, “That’s one shell of a businessman!”
- My friend said he wanted to be a crustacean for Halloween. I told him, “Don’t be ridiculous, you’re already crabby enough!”
- Why don’t crabs donate to charity? Because they’re shellfish!
- Why was the crab staring at the fruit salad? He heard it had pear-fect claws!
Crustacean QnA Quip – QnA Jokes & Puns about Crustacean
- Q: Why did the shrimp refuse to share his treasure chest? A: He was shellfish!
- Q: What’s a crab’s favorite musical genre? A: Rock and roll!
- Q: Why did the lobster get bad grades in school? A: He kept pulling pranks… he was a real pincher!
- Q: Where do crustaceans go to borrow money? A: The prawn shop!
- Q: What does a crustacean wear to a job interview? A: A business shell-suit!
- Q: What do you call a crab that plays baseball? A: A pinch hitter!
- Q: Why are crustaceans such bad dancers? A: They have two left feet!
- Q: What’s a crab’s favorite month? A: Septemb-claw!
- Q: What do you get if you cross a crab and a lemon? A: A crustacean that’s got you puckering up… in a good way!
- Q: Why did the crab blush in the mirror? A: It saw its shell-fie!
- Q: How did the hermit crab pass his driving test? A: He’s got the moves… sideways!
- Q: Why did the restaurant critic give the crab cakes a bad review? A: He thought they were too shellfish!
- Q: What do you call a lazy crab? A: A procrastini-crab!
- Q: Why don’t crabs donate to charity? A: They’re too shellfish!
- Q: What do you get if you cross a crab and a parrot? A: I don’t know, but if it starts talking, you better listen!
Dad Jokes About Crustacean: Pun-Filled Quips
- Why did the crustacean get bad grades? He was always getting shellfish about his work.
- Did you hear about the crustacean who became a comedian? He really pulled in the crowds with his shrimpressive routine.
- I told my son his new pet hermit crab looked a little crabby. He said, “Dad, be clawful, it’s just adjusting!”
- What does a crustacean superhero wear? A crabby patty!
- Why are crustaceans such good singers? They’re always carrying a tune-a!
- I saw a crab walking down the street in a suit. I thought, “Hey, look at that crustacean executive!”
- Why did the shrimp refuse to share his seaweed? He was shellfish!
- What do you get when you cross a crab and a lemon? A sour crustacean!
- Why did the crab get lost on his walk? He kept taking the wrong tide-turning!
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal! (Because of the shells)
- What did the ocean say to the crab? Nothing, it just waved!
- You know what they say, “Once a crustacean, always a crustacean!” Unless they molt, then it’s a shell-shocker!
- My wife told me to take the spider crab out. I told her I already took it to the movies last week, does it want to go bowling now?
- Why don’t they allow crustaceans on airplanes? They like to pinch seats!
- This morning I saw a lobster walking on thin ice… I thought, “Well, that’s a risky shellfish move!”
Crustacean Jokes and Puns for Kids
- Why don’t crabs share their toys? Because they’re shellfish!
- What do you call a crab who plays baseball? A pinch hitter!
- Why did the shrimp cross the ocean? To get to the other tide!
- What does a crab use to surf the internet? A claw-board!
- Where do crustaceans go to learn? At shrimp-stitute!
- What do you get if you cross a crab and a lemon? A sour crab! (But be careful, he looks crabby!)
- Knock, knock! Who’s there? Crab. Crab who? Crab your coat, it’s cold outside!
- Why did the hermit crab get in trouble at school? He kept pinching everyone’s pencils!
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite song? “Shell Shocked!”
- What’s a crab’s favorite game to play at the beach? Sand-castle capture!
- How do you make a lobster laugh? Give it ten-tickles!
- What do you call a crab that loves to fight? A brawl-ster!
- What’s a shrimp’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat! (Because they have good rhythm!)
- Why are crustaceans such good singers? They have great voices in their shells!
- What do you call a very fashionable crab? A claw-ture icon!
Crustacean Jokes and Puns for Elders
- Why did the retired crustacean refuse to go to the seafood restaurant? He said, “I can’t go in there, those are my old shellmates!”
- What did the elderly crab say when he was asked about his youthful hobbies? “Ach, back then, I was absolutely crabby about rock and roll music!”
- I met a hermit crab the other day who swapped his shell for a dice… Turns out he was a gambling crustacean.
- What do you call a group of elderly shrimp who start a singing group? A prawn-to-be rock band.
- My doctor told me I need more calcium in my diet. I guess it’s time to shell out for some lobster dinners.
- Why don’t lobsters share? Because they’re naturally shellfish!
- Retirement is like being a lobster… You spend most of your time hanging out by the water, occasionally pinching someone who annoys you.
- I tried to explain Bitcoin to a crab the other day… He just kept saying, “Talk about a hard-shelled currency!”
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat…and plenty of claws!
- I saw a crab walking down the beach wearing a toupee… I guess you could say he was feeling a little… shell-conscious.
- How can you tell if a crab is planning for retirement? They start putting money away in their “shell” corporation.
- Why don’t they serve lobster at retirement homes? They’re afraid the residents will keep trying to make a run for it!
- I went to a seafood restaurant that had a string quartet playing… They were surprisingly good…guess you could say they were really “shrimp-ressive.”
- My friend said he was going to start a dating service for crustaceans. I told him, “Don’t bother…they’ll just clam up when it comes to commitment!”
Crustacean Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Social Media
- Why did the shrimp get bad grades? Because he kept pulling pranks on his crustacean classmates! 🦐
- Just saw a crab rave in the ocean. It was off the shell! 🎧🦀
- What do you call a crustacean’s autobiography? A shell-f portrait. 📖
- Why don’t lobsters share? Because they’re shellfish! 🦞
- My friend said he wanted to name his pet crab “Pinchy,” but I told him that was a little crabby. 😌
- Lobster to friend: “Hey man, wanna grab some kelp later? I’m starving!” 🍽️
- Crabs are the ultimate multitaskers. They can walk sideways and carry their homes on their backs! 💪🦀
- What do you call a group of crustaceans that start a band? A shell shock rock band! 🎸
- Dating a lobster is tough. They’re always so crabby about their exes. 💔
- Heard there’s a new seafood restaurant opening up on the beach. They’re calling it “The Crustacean Station.” 🦞🦐🦀
- Why didn’t the hermit crab get invited to parties? He was too shell-shocked from being a homebody. 🏠
- I’m not saying I’m obsessed with crustaceans, but… I did just spend an hour scrolling through crab memes. 😅
- Just saw a sign that said “Free crabs!” Turns out, they were just giving away hugs. I feel so shellfish. 🤗
- What’s a crustacean’s favorite type of music? Shell-shocked rock! 🤘 Bonus Pun: What’s a crustacean’s favorite social media platform? Snap-claw! 👻📸
Shell We Dance Out of Here? 🦀😂
Well, shell we call it a day? We’ve had our fill of crustacean comedy, and it’s time to scuttle on. But don’t worry, there are plenty more laughs to be had! Explore our website for a whole ocean of hilarious puns and jokes that are sure to make you smile (or groan, we don’t judge).